A Twist in the Myth: Bad Things Coming
by Kashoku1
Summary: With every passing day Kashoku and Kage become closer to their teams, but further away from the things that brought them to Earth. When tragedy strikes the SGC, relationships will shift and Sereclipse will never be what it once was. SEQUEL TO ATITM: Sereclipse
1. Chapter 1

Kashoku's alarm went off in a raging thunder against her ear. Kage must have changed the settings on her phone again, because this was most definitely not her usual alarm tone. With a heavy groan she sat up, flipping her long hair out of her face and reached over to dismiss the obnoxious tune. With silence pleasantly filling the room again she called out, "Daniel?" Looking over her shoulder at the other side of the bed she saw that the sheets were pulled up and the pillows were propped up neatly against the headboard. "You made your side of the bed?" she muttered angrily to herself at the sight. With an agitated huff she flung the covers off of her enough to disrupt the neatness of the other half and hopped out of bed. "Daniel!" On bare feet she padded through the hallway towards the kitchen. The smell of coffee lingered in the air, which was hopeful.

Sure enough, Daniel was there at the counter, fully dressed and bag in hand as if he was ready to walk out the door. He looked up over his travel mug, "Oh, good. You're up. Is it going to take you long to get ready? I have an early meeting I need to get to."

Kashoku bit at her lower lip, trying to keep her frustration at bay. "Why didn't you tell me I needed to get up earlier? Or better yet, why didn't you just wake me up?"

"You were already in bed when I remembered it, and I didn't want to wake you up." He shrugged. "Can you at least wait to put your make-up on in the car?"

That did it. With an angered huff Kashoku flipped her hair over her shoulder and crossed her arms. "Go. I'll see you at work."

Daniel frowned. "How are you going to get there?"

"I'll figure it out! Go!" With a deep breath she added kindly, trying to salvage the situation, "Don't be late to your meeting."

Daniel seemed to hesitate before finally acquiescing. "Alright, bye." Grabbing his keys from the counter he left Kashoku alone in the apartment.

Scrolling down her contacts list on her phone Kashoku found Wells and pressed dial. Although she had recently gotten her license, she didn't yet feel comfortable to have her own vehicle and drive herself around without supervision. Daniel was her ride to work, and she was too emotionally exhausted to continue their fighting.

"What? I'm not late yet!" Wells's groggy voice answered the phone.

It made Kashoku smile. "I'm not calling because of that. I was going to ask if you had left yet, but I'll take your answer as a no."

"Nah, I might have probably just woken up. What's up?"

"I need you to give me a ride. Daniel was trying to be nice and let me sleep thinking it was my day off, so I was late getting up." The lie slipped easily off of her tongue. It had become increasingly easier over the past few months when her relationship with Daniel was brought up with her peers.

"So he left you."

"No, he was going to be late so I told him to go," she rebutted. That part was at least true. Kashoku knew Daniel would have waited had she asked, but the uncomfortable drives to and from work with him lately had her wanting to avoid it at every cost.

"Uh-huh. Yeah, I'll be over there in an hour. Text you when I'm a few blocks out."

"Thanks, Brandon." She hung up the phone and began changing, relieved that she had found a way to work, but still agitated at hers and Daniel's fight from the previous night trickling into the next day. It was childish. With not much time before Wells arrived, Kashoku haphazardly threw on a quick face in the mirror and put her hair up in a messy bun before heading down to the lobby of the apartments. Not a few minutes after receiving his text, Wells pulled up in his sports car.

"I owe you," Kashoku grinned thankfully as she threw her handbag in and settled into the passenger's seat.

"I'll add it to your tab." He winked and shifted the car into gear before it was off again.

They stayed in a comfortable silence for the majority of the trip, too sleep ridden to attempt real conversation. The sun was just now starting to rise on the other side of the mountains. As they began the ascent up the mountainside to the base Wells brought up the topic Kashoku had hoped would not come up.

"So you two are fighting, huh?" He asked casually.

"I never said that," Kashoku responded calmly. "I told you what happened. Why are you questioning it?"

"Because Daniel was part of our brief yesterday for today's mission," he pointed out. "He knew you didn't have the day off."

Oh. Sucking in a deep breath, she decided to simply admit the truth. "We might have had a disagreement last night that could have easily caused us both to forget those minor details."

"About what?" he asked curiously.

Kashoku rolled her eyes at the mere thought of the fight. "Yevon forbid-"

"God," Wells corrected. He and Carr had played huge factors in her assimilation to Earth's culture, and correcting her lingo was their favorite thing to do – especially when it came to trying to add cuss words into her vocabulary.

"God forbid I leave my makeup on the bathroom counter because there is nowhere else to store it with all his artifacts taking up every shelf in the apartment. And I'm not allowed to touch anything anymore after I accidentally broke his stupid African fertility statue!" When Kashoku looked over at Wells, he was giving her the most amused grin. "What's so funny?"

"Seeing you worked up like this." He gave a low chuckle before licking his lips thoughtfully. "But seriously. How long has this been going on?"

Kashoku sunk deeper into the seat, arms crossing. "I don't know. A few weeks I guess?"

"Really? Because this isn't the first time you've asked me to give you a ride. Or Carr. Or Ramirez. I know you've even asked Rodd once because we were all gone. You think that just because you ask different people that we don't all talk and notice something is going on?" Wells raised an eyebrow, waiting for her answer. "I cringe at the thought of you having to call Bentley for a ride."

"That wouldn't happen in a million years," Kashoku assured. She debated on whether or not to continue downplaying the situation with Daniel, but if she knew Wells as well as she thought she did, he was already well aware of their relationship issues. "Fine. It's been…off and on again for probably the past month. Things were going really well when I first moved in. Then…I don't know. Guess you learn a lot more about someone when you live with them."

Wells gave a snort as they cleared security and moved underground to the parking area. "Ain't that the truth. It'll drive you crazy. The makeup thing sounds like a pretty typical argument, but I don't like that he so easily left you to find your way to work. What if one of us can't give you a ride one day?" He put the car in park and turned it off. "It's bullshit, Kash."

"I know, and he would have waited if I had asked," Kashoku groaned in agreement, stepping out of the car. "We're working on it, okay? Can we just go to work now?"

"If he hurts you, I'm obligated to kill him, you know," Wells promised.

"Get in line behind Kage," Kashoku smiled. With that they moved into the comfort of their usual routine, passing through security with the newly added hand scanner after the last lockdown. Kashoku had acquired full clearance the moment she moved in with Daniel, but it never failed that she was still always coming in and out with someone. She and Wells parted ways at the locker rooms and in a comfortable silence she went through the motions of changing into her uniform. Wednesdays were blue days. Hair firmly tied back in a long ponytail she selected the button on the elevator for a few floors up to the mess hall since she had failed to grab herself any sort of meal prior to having to hitch a ride with Wells that morning. Daniel had been pushed to the far reaches of her mind until she regretfully saw him standing in the back of the line she was now approaching.

Sucking in a deep breath through her nose she took up the space behind him with a smile. "Make it to your meeting on time? Was it for an upcoming mission?"

"I did, thanks, and yeah. Mission isn't until tomorrow, but there was a lot to debrief," Daniel responded, hands firmly shoved into his pockets.

It wasn't the right time, but Kashoku couldn't help it. "I'm sorry that I broke your artifact and I'm sorry that I kind of took over the bathroom."

For a moment Daniel looked like he might try to argue, but he closed his eyes apologetically and ran his fingers over his temple. "I know. I just…I don't know. I know you didn't mean it."

Kashoku felt her jaw clench in small irritation at the lack of any kind of real apology, but it was a good start. "Daniel, we barely see each other, even when we live with one another, and when we are together we do nothing but fight. We start out having normal conversations that escalate into arguments. Our rides to and from work hold valuable time we could be spending with one another, but lately it's been nothing but an insatiable silence. It's not fair." Kashoku thanked the server with a smile and she took her tray and followed Daniel to a table.

"Fair?" Daniel's soft face turned back into the harsh lines she had been seeing so frequently of late. "What's fair about you constantly deciding to go out with Captain Wells and Carr instead of coming home and spending time with me? You sneak in at two and three in the morning hoping I don't notice that you smell of booze and smoke!"

"I invite you out every time we go do something and every time you say no!" Kashoku argued back irritably.

"I don't want to hang out with them, Kashoku!" he exclaimed, his voice carrying further than he intended. "I don't even want you to hang out with them! They are bad influences! There are so many dangerous habits – especially when Captain Bentley is involved – that you could pick up from them and you wouldn't know better!"

Kashoku could feel the shock and anger slam into her. "Why are you insinuating that my teammates would purposely expose me to something potentially dangerous and harmful?"

"Because I don't know them, Kashoku, and already they are exposing you to gateways. I'm worried already that they have you drinking way too much!" Daniel continued to argue, trying to show some sort of sense of concern rather than anger, but instead getting some sort of mix of the two that only added to Kashoku's irritation.

"It's called being social, Daniel," Kashoku glared. "We usually only have a few drinks – if that – when we go out. Believe it or not, we are all capable of being adults and controlling ourselves when we do. You are sitting here acting as if I come home blasted every night, incapable of functioning the morning after. You would know that I didn't if you ever bothered to stick around in the mornings! And yes, I go out with them all the time because they want to spend time with me. You never ask to do anything. It's always 'I have too much work to do.' So don't play that game with me!" Sucking in a shaking breath through her nostrils she decided against continuing on with their argument. It wasn't worth it. "I have a mission to get ready for." Leaving her food completely untouched she got up and left.

She needed to see Kage. With determined haste she made for SG-11's office, and was greeted with their usual robust vulgar.

"Well, well, if it ain't 'Five-dolla-love-me-long-time'," Bentley wiggled his eyebrows as Kashoku entered.

Kashoku had never seen the movie the reference was from, but Ramirez had explained it to her once, and it was insulting. Unfortunately, it was part of the SG-11 package, and she had learned over the past few months to tune Bentley out of most conversations. Even more unfortunately, he often made it a point to be noticed by her. Today, however, he seemed content to leave her alone once Kage gave the back of his chair a warning kick.

She had instantly picked up on Kashoku's distress. "Dou shita no?" Taking a good hard look at her friend, her eyes narrowed in anger. "Kare ga naniwoshita?"

"I'm just…" Kashoku sighed as she took a seat on Kage's desk. "I'm tired, Kage."

Kage's body straightened, jaw clenching. "I'll kill him."

Ramirez raised a curious brow from across the office. "Trouble in paradise, puta bonita?" The usual smile that the nickname received was nowhere to be found. Sucking in a breath, Ramirez abruptly announced to the room, "Alright, anyone with a dick needs to go whack one off in the gym."

"Nah, I took care of that a few minutes ago," Bentley replied cheekily.

Ramirez glared murder at him. "Out, asshole. I don't care if you go take a shit or go for round two but fuck off for a bit."

Bentley groaned. "But the gym's so far away! And baby, you know if you aren't there I don't have nothing to whack off to!"

Rafe had to muffle his snort, but he grabbed hold of his teammate's arm and pulled him up. "Come on, man, let's let the ladies do their thing." Bentley gave a whine of protest, but left the office without much fight beyond telling Kage not to open her filing drawer anytime soon.

There was a long disgusted silence where all three of them stared at the drawer in question, even though two of them knew for certain Bentley hadn't actually had the opportunity. Finally, Ramirez rolled her eyes and turned back to Kashoku, deciding to be the one to break the ice. "We've all held our tongues this past month, trying to respect your privacy with Jackson, but this is it. I ain't buying it anymore, puta."

"Oh, god," Kashoku groaned, fighting back the urge to cry. "Does everyone know?"

"No," Ramirez assured, "but we're practically your teammates we work together so much, and if we don't notice these kinds of things we don't deserve that title. You've been coming up with all these excuses why he's treating you the way he is, and I'm done with it."

"Stop," Kashoku said firmly, her fingers gripping tightly onto the edge of the desk. "It's a two-way street, okay? I've played my hand in this just as much as he has."

"Yeah, whatever, puta. I'm not saying you aren't an annoying cunt some days – I totally believe you give as much shit as he does, but you didn't come to us for impartial, fair opinions. I'm obligated to take sides, and his ain't the one I'm taking," she pointed out plainly. "I'm kind of with Kage on the whole 'not liking him' thing."

With a hesitant glance Kashoku looked to her best friend. Kage had a hardened jaw and darkened eyes. It was clear that she was holding something in. Blowing out a hot breath of air through her nose, she caved. "Just say it, Kage. You told me so."

"Yes," Kage agreed quickly, "I did. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't happy it isn't working out. The offer to kick his ass is always on the table, Kashy. In fact, it's really not an offer but a promise. Dump his ass and be done with it."

Kashoku huffed in disapproval. "No, thank you. We're going to work it out, I know it."

"You're all about those second, third, fourth, and fifth chances, aren't you, puta?" Ramirez hummed with disapproval, her weight shifting in her stance as she crossed her arms.

"I traveled millions of light years to be with him. If you did that, wouldn't you do all that you could to make it work?" Kashoku asked, hoping if she told herself that enough that maybe even she would believe it. Although a part of her still honestly believed that things could get better again, that hope had been dwindling with every conversation she and Daniel had.

"Nope," Ramirez answered plainly. "Especially not when that light year travel takes less than a fucking minute. But seriously, sometimes you can't fix what's broke, and you just have to go find a replacement."

Kashoku had come to the two women in hopes of comforting words, but had received the exact opposite. With a determined face she expressed with full certainty, "We are going to make this work." Sliding off the desk she left the office and made for the comfort of her own team. They were slated to head out soon, anyway. Wells and Carr were absent from the room, leaving the southern ginger as the only person in the office. It was actually somewhat relieving. "Morning, Jeremy. How are you doing?"

He smiled from his desk. "Pumped, ma'am. I'm excited to work with the Algorians on their shield system. I haven't really felt useful on a mission in a while."

"Don't kid yourself, you are always useful." She smiled as she put a supportive hand on his shoulder. "You promised me you would invite me over one night and introduce me to NASCAR, your guilty pleasure!"

Rodd responded with a bright smile. "Season hasn't quite started up yet, ma'am. And it is my guilty pleasure. The sport is so often tied to negative connotations for fans, but I grew up right next to a major venue for it. Kind of hard not to expose yourself to it. I promise as soon as the season starts up to invite you over, although watching on TV is nothing like seeing it firsthand."

"Look forward to it!" Kashoku beamed brightly, already feeling better with the mission at hand. "I guess Brandon and Robbie are already getting ready?"

Rodd gave a nod. "The major asked for them beforehand, but then they were headed to the locker rooms. We should probably get going as well."

Kashoku nodded. "Alright then. Shall we?"

Kage hated briefings. They were the bane of her existence. At least this time it was only General Hammond giving the brief. Once scientists involved themselves it was a gun to her temple. Kage had been pulled in on this mission due to the heavy presence of Jaffa. Whatever was on the planet was valuable enough for the SGC to want to get on the people's good side, and that meant helping them with their Goa'uld problem. Apparently, whatever System Lord had claimed Gwarrin hundreds of years ago had never been back to check up on it, leaving the Jaffa to just run amok. It sounded like an easy go in and massacre as far as she could tell. Why they needed to sit here and talk about tactics for an hour was beyond her. She could make quick work of this.

Kage, having spaced off into her own little world, didn't notice the meeting had ended until Bentley kicked her from underneath the table. The instant glare she shot across drew a grin from his smug face. "What. The fuck?"

"Where were you hanging out that entire meeting, because it wasn't in this room?" He grinned.

"I understand the mission: kill. Not much else I need to pay attention to, now is there?" Kage pushed herself out of the chair and rose to her feet.

"Right on," Bentley cheered. "Let's go perform some gratuitous violence then."

"The things that give you a boner," Ramirez huffed.

"Please, Margarita," Bentley drawled, "like snapping a few bones doesn't get your cunt all wet."

"Only if they are yours," Ramirez purred back.

"Shut your traps and get your gear on," Connors finally interjected. "No more of your bullshit. This is a high risk mission and I need all of your heads out of your asses, you hear me?"

"Yes, sir," Ramirez and Bentley responded, their attitudes quickly shifting.

Kage simply rolled her eyes. Whatever. Already in her Warrior sphere she was ready to go. This was going to be her first real mission. She had been on a few others where there had been a threat of violence breaking out, but this was the first time she was going to see real action. Her magic needed the workout, and she was happy to oblige.

Connors could sense Kage's eagerness as he walked through the doors to the bottom of the ramp where Kage waited. His intuition intrigued Kage, and the more she got to know her leader the more she came to have a respect for his skills as a soldier. It was a long way still from even touching the word 'like' with a stick. "Don't get too excited. This isn't a fucking free-for-all," the man warned.

"Yeah, yeah," Kage waved him off. "Give me the target and I'll take care of business, of that I can assure you."

Connors made no further comment as they waited for the rest of their team. Even as the event horizon settled into place, Kage could still sense he was highly unimpressed by her remarks. Popping the crick out of her neck she readied herself and began the march up the ramp and through the wormhole, emerging into what was very predictably a forest. The locals were waiting for them at the bottom of the stairs. Thankfully they were on a fairly similar level to advancement as those on Earth so they wouldn't be completely useless in the fight. SG-4 and 9 had come through earlier to lead the advance.

"Colonel Connors, I am Mira," a woman stepped forward extending her hand in greeting. Though she hadn't spoken it aloud, her uniform and overall bearing definitely seemed to indicate some sort of rank.

"Pleasure," Connors acknowledged. "I understand our other teams have been a great help to you, but you require a little more forceful action." He began following Mira as she motioned them along.

"Yes. We have made a huge dent in the Jaffa forces, but we are having problems penetrating their base. They have technology that has been able to take out our forces by the numbers and they have a shield. We know where the device is and how to disable it, but we cannot get close. I understand there is a member of your team who might be able to assist with this?"

Connors glanced back at Kage. "She might."

Kage smirked. Sounded like a job for Thief. "Tell me where and how, and I'll take care of it for you."

Mira gave an approving nod. "Good. I will go over the schematics with you."

It was rare that Kashoku got to see Rodd like this. He was in a euphoric bliss as the Algorian scientist who had introduced himself as Byyr walked him through their technology. It was some sort of large touch-screen that they were working with that even Kashoku was somewhat infatuated with.

"Like a kid in a candy store," Carr shook his head. "Glad someone is having fun around here."

"For someone who gets to do something everyone on Earth would kill to do, you sure do complain a lot," Ellis groaned, long ago irritated by Carr's comments.

"It ain't an easy job, sir, but someone has to do it and I happily volunteered," Carr replied accompanied with a sarcastic grin.

Kashoku smiled at the friendly bantering between her teammates, but elected not to join in, deciding instead to take the opportunity she had to learn. "How's it going?" she asked Rodd, coming to stand behind his right shoulder.

"Fantastic," Rodd beamed. "It'll take a lot of adjustments to our own technology, but I understand the mechanics and all the engineering behind their computer systems. It's not fancy shields or weapons, but being able to have this interactive system could be really useful with schematics and simulations. I think given some time I could create this back on Earth."

"That's great!" she cheered. "I'll be the first to test it out, right?"

He smiled at her and promised, "It would be no one else."

Kashoku was about to continue the conversation with a question about the models laid out on the screen in front of them when a door burst open with personnel.

"Byyr! The Kyrons have destroyed Point 15! There is a hole in our shields and they are attacking!" the man burst out in panic.

"Kryons?" Ellis questioned, instantly readying his weapons.

"They are our people who were infected with a disease," Byyr explained. "A virus that has caused them to go insane. They feed on their own kind and can pass on the disease to anyone they draw blood on."

"Zombie-pocalypse!" Carr cried in excitement as he, too, readied his weapon.

"Let's Resident Evil this bitch," Well agreed with great approval.

"Kashoku, stay here and keep these two out of trouble while they try and get the shield fixed," Ellis commanded.

Kashoku nodded and turned to Byyr. "Can you do that remotely here?"

Byyr nodded as the rest of SG-15 departed. "Yes. I can divert the power of our shield to cover the hole for a period of time that would allow us to make necessary repairs. Lieutenant Rodd, please assist me. I will begin rerouting the power here on the model," the scientist moved to the panel where a 3D model of their shield systems beamed from the screen. "Monitor the levels and tell me how to adjust."

Rodd nodded and began moving charts and numbers all across the screen, shouting out things Kashoku could not even begin to comprehend. Instead she turned and took a watchful eye on any entry points that the Kryons could come in through. No threat seemed to make themselves known while Rodd and Byyr shouted behind her, her breath holding for that one second danger presented itself.

"Got it!" Rodd bellowed in pride.

Almost immediately their radios began to cackle with Ellis's voice. "Shield is back online, but quite of few of these things made their way through. I think I saw one headed your way. Be advised. They go down easy, but they are quick sons-of-bitches."

Kashoku reached for her shoulder and pressed the appropriate button. "Understood." Without hesitation her SG uniform was replaced with the bright pink and teals of her Gunner uniform.

"Can you protect us?" Byyr questioned, doubt in his voice.

"Better than anyone," Rodd answered confidently.

A spark of pride flared up in Kashoku at the comment, and she only hoped she could live up to the expectations laid upon her by her teammate. A thunderous boom erupted from the door, a human sized dent now shaped in the metal. Kashoku readied her guns at her side. Sucking in a breath she let her magic flow and protective shields were cast on all three of them.

With another few body slams against the door the Kryons were through, and it was more than just the one Ellis had indicated. Kashoku and Rodd were instantly firing away, but Ellis had been right that they were quick. One lunged at Kashoku and she was able to dodge and fire a kick that stunned the creature long enough for her to get her shots out through its skull. Kashoku looked up in time to see one flying towards Rodd. Instinctively the man ducked, but the Kryon only came in contact with the shield illuminating the room in a brilliant blue. Kashoku took the moment to pull the Kryon away by its collar and place a shot between its eyes. It dropped to the floor and she quickly made work of the remaining two.

Satisfied that she had cleared the room of the threat she extended a hand to Rodd. "You okay?"

Rodd blew out a sigh of relief as he took her hand. "Thanks to you."

Kashoku chuckled softly as she helped him to his feet. "You have a weapon, Jeremy. You have to learn to shoot it."

"I know," Rodd groaned in defeat.

"Local military says they were able to contain and have this under control. We are on our way back. Are you guys okay?" Ellis spoke through the radio.

"We're fine," Kashoku responded. "Some Kryons broke through, but threat neutralized and no harm done to us."

"Roger. Be there in a few."

Heart racing with adrenaline Kashoku let her dress sphere dissipate. The scientists brushed themselves off and almost immediately went back to working on the repairs via the computer screen. Rodd was still shaken, even though he paid attention in great detail to Byyr's words. Kashoku just hoped she could always be there to protect him.

It was almost laughable at how easily it was to sneak past all the Jaffa's defenses without being detected. True, SG-11 and several members of the Gwarrin military were providing a distraction, but she was confident that she could have easily done this without it. She wondered how anyone got anything done without the use of dress spheres. There had only been two Jaffa guarding the device and she had swiftly and silently taken care of them without any trouble. Flipping her pony tail over her shoulder she began tinkering with the shield. Honestly, it would have been far easier to just destroy the damn thing, but Mira was wanting to preserve it to use it later, and it wasn't long before the shield was deactivated and the panicked sounds of Jaffa shouting filled her ears.

With satisfaction pouring from her Kage changed to her Warrior sphere and gave her sword a twirl before running full-blast towards the fight. So focused on what was in front of them, the Jaffa were taken by surprise and fell fast and quick under Kage's sword. Knocking the final Jaffa onto his back she raised her sword and rammed it through his gut with fulfillment. Silence fell over the base as Connors's voice called for cease-fire. Kage pulled her sword from the corpse and smugly made her way to her team.

"You did it! Thank you! Your skill was very impressive." Mira praised the Spiran.

Kage gave a nonchalant shrug. "It was kind of too easy. Anymore Jaffa need killing?"

"You may assist your other teams, SG-4 and 9 if you are able to. We would greatly appreciate it," Mira mentioned.

"You get too much pleasure out of killing things, even for me," Ramirez uttered with a raised eyebrow.

"Hey, now, we all have our kinks, Margarita," Bentley defended her, though Kage wasn't sure she really needed that as a defense. The man was already wiggling his brows at Ramirez and continuing salaciously, "Though I'm still waiting to hear more of yours."

Connors rolled his eyes. "Immature little fucks, the lot of you." Turning his gaze to Kage he raised his chin. "Well done. Finally putting all your talents to use. Has to feel a lot better than sitting around the SGC all day."

Kage clenched her jaw. The truth was, she had enjoyed it - immensely. It felt good going out and doing something for once. Not that she was going to admit that to Connors any time soon. "It's not Spira, but it'll do," she said.

There was a glimmer of amusement in his eyes. "Well, let's not disappoint. Might as well give the guys a hand towards the north. We'll be happy to sit back and let you take care of it, if you want."

Kage snorted. "You'll just get in the way if you don't. My finger sometimes tends to slip and I don't notice the difference between friend and foe." Connors simply grinned that toothy grin that irritated the fuck out of her. It was almost scary. Almost.

The debriefing killed any high that Kage had been on from her killing spree. Connors spewed out nothing but words of praise towards Kage and how helpful she had been. Kage had never been one to enjoy being commended for her actions. She was a fear driven person, and would rather people be in awe over her in a negative light. Although this would mean she would more than likely start going on more missions where there was the potential for action, it would also mean she'd start going on more missions where there wasn't.

But it might mean going on more missions with Kashoku and less time spending time in her room by herself. With a frustrated groan she admitted to herself that maybe this was working out. Thoughts swimming in confusion she followed behind Ramirez to head for the showers. Once done she sought out Kashoku who was working on her mission report. It took her a lot longer than the other members of her team, but she had improved greatly over the past few months in her writing abilities.

Kashoku beamed when she noticed her friend. "Hey! How did it go?"

"I pillaged and plundered: what I do best. It was fun, for all five seconds it took me to eliminate the threat. Honestly, Kashy, it's embarrassing to think that Earth has such a hard time fighting the Jaffa," Kage huffed.

"Your face is embarrassing," Carr muttered from his desk area.

Kage gave him a glare while Kashoku chuckled. Kashoku brushed a strand of hair out of her face and smiled. "I'm glad it went well, Kage."

Kage shrugged. "How was your gallivant across the galaxy?"

"Okay," Kashoku mused. "We ran into a local fiend, but it wasn't anything I couldn't handle. We are finally getting the next two days off. That'll give me a day to do something with Daniel."

Kage rolled her eyes at the mention of the archaeologist, but she knew better than to bring the subject up in front of her teammates. "Yes, well, it must be nice to be able to go off base."

Kashoku sighed. "Give it time, Kage. You knew this would happen. Keep doing well on missions and it'll give the Pentagon more of a reason to allow you some freedom."

"Whatever," Kage mumbled as she fiddled with one of Kashoku's pens. "Bentley wanted to introduce me to some of the games they have here, so I'll at least be occupied for a while tonight."

"I'm glad you are getting along with them," Kashoku admitted. "I was worried with all the strong personalities you all might have some issues."

"Oh, there are some issues alright, but it could be way worse. Ramirez and Rafe are alright, and Connors at least knows how useful I can be out there. I am caught between a never-ending battle of wanting to kill or praise Bentley though. There's always such a fine line," she complained.

"Kill. The answer is always kill," Wells piped in.

Kashoku gave another laugh. "Well, either way. In terms of 'Kage' things are going well."

Kage shrugged again. "Meh. Well, I should leave you to your report. I already finished mine." Kashoku gave her a glare as she walked out.

Kashoku was still trying to finish up her report as Wells and Carr began wrapping things up for the day and were ready to head out. Both men had offered to help, but she had refused, wanting to do it herself. Wells asked if he needed to stay to take her home, but Kashoku waived him off, assuring him that Daniel would do so. Things had been rocky between them that morning, but she was determined to make things right on the ride home.

Kashoku hadn't noticed that Rodd had gone out and changed to his civilian clothes when he approached her desk. "Headed out?"

"Uh, yeah," Rodd nodded. "But I…I. I was wondering if maybe you wanted to come to my place and have dinner? Just as a way of saying thank you."

Kashoku gave him a puzzled look. "What for?"

Rodd bit at his lower lip. "For everything. You are the only one who stands up for me against Captain Carr and you encourage me all the time. I mean, our team is far from mean or anything, but I guess I'm an easy target. I just… Thank you for being there for me."

Kashoku could feel her heartstrings being tugged on with a great deal of force. "You don't need to thank me, Jeremy. It's a common courtesy you deserve. You and Major Carter are the smartest people I've ever met."

Rodd's pale skin flushed bright red bringing out the freckles spattered across his cheeks. "I'd still like to make you dinner. I haven't had a good southern meal in a long time. Fried chicken and grits makes too much for me to eat, but no one can beat my momma's recipe."

Kashoku had wanted to spend the evening with Daniel. She had wanted to make peace, but it was a much easier decision for her than it should have been. "I'd love that. I was just sending off this report and then I'll go change. Meet you back here in a few?"

Rodd gave an enthusiastic nod. "Sure. I'll be happy to take you to Dr. Jackson's place when we are done, too."

"Great," Kashoku smiled. She sent off the report to Hammond and then headed to the locker rooms to change. She hadn't worn the best outfit this morning, but she supposed Rodd wouldn't really care.

"Going out?" Daniel called to her as she made her way back to the elevator.

Kashoku turned around, Daniel approaching in his own civilian wear. She felt her heart sink. "Yeah. Jeremy invited me to his place for dinner. Apparently his mother's recipes are the best around." She gave a small laugh as they entered the elevator together. "I'm sorry; I thought you might be working late tonight. I'm not trying to -"

"Don't," Daniel interjected. "You don't need to be sorry. I'm the one that should apologize about my comments earlier. I shouldn't have made those accusations. I know you are getting close to your team, and that's how it should be. They are your family."

A weight lifted off of Kashoku's shoulders with the apology. "At the same time, I need to make more of an effort to do things with you."

"Well, the same could be said for us both," Daniel admitted. "Go. Have fun. Nothing beats a good home-cooked southern meal. I'll catch you later tonight?"

"Of course." Kashoku smiled as the elevator doors opened and she stepped out on her floor. She could feel a new bounce in her step as she approached the office. Beaming she stuck out a hand towards Rodd. "Let's go!"


	2. Chapter 2

Kashoku's relationship with Daniel seemed to finally be going back uphill again. When they were at the SGC at the same time, Kashoku had begun spending the time back in Daniel's office whenever she was able to and with it caused Kage to spend more time with SG-11. Everything seemed to be back on track, and Kashoku finally found herself able to sleep soundly again because of it.

They both had somehow managed to get off early and Kashoku had convinced Daniel to go out and run some errands while she helped do chores at the apartment. Pulling a recipe book from the counter she began flipping through the pages for the one she was fairly confident she could muster up without burning the place down. It was a simple pasta and salad, but she hoped that Daniel would appreciate the effort none-the-less. Setting the water on the stove to boil she headed for their shared room to begin on her next project.

Opening the closest and shuffling through a few of the items had her cringing with embarrassment. She had kind of taken over the entire place. With a longing sigh she began pulling out all the items that were hers and placing them neatly on the bed. She had a lot to do before Daniel got home and not a lot of time to do it in. Thinking about easily she would get distracted she headed back to the kitchen and set a timer for herself before diving into the work.

When Daniel called out his arrival Kashoku had just managed to finish her project and begin setting the table. Daniel walked in with several bags in toe and wide eyes. "Wow, you made dinner! It smells great!" Dropping the bags onto the counter he leaned in for a kiss.

"Thank you," Kashoku beamed. "I just hope it tastes as good as it smells. And look!" She waved her hands out towards the stove, "I managed not to burn anything!"

"I'm proud of you," Daniel admitted proudly. "No one would ever know you came from a different planet."

"Wouldn't go quite that far, but we're working on it." Kashoku reached up into the cabinet to pull down to cups. "It's almost ready. Why don't you go freshen up? I'll pour us some wine."

"Sounds absolutely perfect," Daniel sighed happily as he began shrugging out of his jacket and headed for their shared bedroom.

Kashoku grabbed the corkscrew from the drawer and began making work of the wine bottle. She knew this was one of his favorites, and she was fairly certain he had mentioned something about it going well with this type of food on their planet. She wasn't really sure how certain alcohols went better with different types of food, but it was just another item on the long list of things she had to learn. Just as she was about to grab the glasses to take to the table she was spun around and brought into a forceful kiss. "Unf!" She cried out in surprise, but it was quickly silenced. The kiss was long and deep, leaving Kashoku seeing stars before Daniel pulled away. "Wow," she breathed. "Not that I'm complaining, but what was that for?"

"You cleaned up everything," Daniel stated as if it were obvious. "It's exactly the way I wanted everything."

Kashoku felt herself blush as she tucked a strand behind her ear. "Well…see? I'm trying. I just didn't understand at first."

"You are making me feel like I've been an asshole because if I had just spoken more clearly-,"

Kashoku cut him off, "Don't, Daniel. What's done is done, and we've gotten past it, and things are ok. Let's just keep it that way, neh?" She picked up a wine glass and handed it to him while she kept the other. "Kanpai!"

"Final Round, FIGHT."

The sound of buttons being jammed filled Kage's living quarters. Bentley was propped up on a bunch of pillows next to Kage on the bed as they battled away on the screen in front of them. Rafe was settled in the chair off to the side with his feet propped up on the coffee table.

"Sonya WINS."

"God, dammit!" Bentley threw down his control in anger.

Kage chuckled wildly with a smug smile as she crossed her arms in satisfaction. "How is it that you are so terrible at fighting even in a video game?"

"This isn't fair, man! You can't beat me at my own game!" Bentley whined.

Rafe laughed, "She did. Way more than once. She KO'd your ass."

"This game is fun. We should play again," Kage grinned as she picked up your controller again to choose her character.

"I'm not playing anymore," Bentley shoved the controller at Rafe who took it with a pleased look.

"Humility looks awful on you," he laughed as he began scrolling through his own character selection.

"Hate to break up the party, boys," Ramirez's voice barged in as the door swung open, "But it's time to gear up. Mira from Gwarrin contacted us not too long ago. Says the Jaffa have been regrouping and they need more help. They specifically requested us – mainly Kage."

"Finally, something I'm good at," Bentley spoke hopefully.

Kage gave a snort. "Down, Down, Right, Square doesn't quite have the same effect in real life, Bentley."

"Fuck you!" Bentley growled as he brushed past Ramirez.

"Oh, someone got their dick smashed," Ramirez hummed playfully. "Come on, you can have a re-match of the re-match when we get back."

SG-11 suited up quickly and made it through the gate to Gwarrin. Like before, Mira was there to greet them, although there were a lot more armed forces around than before.

"I apologize, but we must ask for your assistance once more."There was camp of Jaffa that we were previously unaware of until we were informed by one of the prisoners," Mira explained. They had technology that kept them off our radar. We've been able to penetrate through, and know their exact location, but I worry about what we will face when we get there. Kage turned the tide during the last battle, and I wanted her here again in case her services were once again needed."

"We're happy to provide any kind of assistance you need," Connors assured her. "Put us where you need us, and we'll handle business."

Mira nodded. "It is a ways to travel. We have much quicker means of travel, but we are trying to maintain the element of surprise."

Connors nodded in understanding, "It's no problem. We don't mind the trek."

If Kage had known it was really as long as it was, she would have vocally disagreed with Connors big time. They had been walking for almost two hours now with no sign of-Connors held up his hand signaling them all to freeze. Kage smiled to herself. Finally. He waved for them to crouch down behind cover.

Two O'Clock, Connors mouthed. He received several of nods in response as weapons were drawn to the ready. Kage watched as he began using the signals to move the people in the direction he wanted to flank the spotted troops. He looked to Kage and gave her a nod. She knew what it meant. She was to lead the attack. Silently changing to Thief she began moving with haste towards the spotted Jaffa. She didn't know how long she'd have before they took notice, but she would take out as many as she could before it happened.

With one swell swoop of her dagger she slit the throat of the first Jaffa and quickly rammed the other through the chest before he could cry out. The two bodies fell to the forest floor and she quickly moved on to the next group.

"JAFFA! KREE!"

"Go time!" Kage shouted before grinning and charging full force. The fire-fight began raging on around her as she fought, taking them out one-by-one. It was easy to see the Jaffa were outnumbered and they quickly had the Jaffa falling back in retreat. Kage wasn't going to let them leave here alive. She began running after them, grabbing hold of one of them by the armored collar and pulling him back before stabbing him in the chest.

"Kage!" Connors shouted at her. "Stay here!"

"They are retreating! We need to stop them before they bring in reinforcements!" Kage argued.

"I said stay here," he barked angrily. "That's an order, Kage!"

Kage gave a dismissive snort before changing into her Black Mage robes and running after them, picking them off with fire spells as they went. She had no idea how far she had gone tracking them down, but the Jaffa fell effortlessly beneath her magic. There was just one more unaccounted for.

"Kage!"

She turned to see Rafe running up after her. Kage rolled her eyes. "I've got this."

"It doesn't matter," he breathed, coming to a stop to catch his breath. "The Colonel gave you an order, and you didn't follow it. He gives them for a reason, Kage."

Kage crossed her arms in irritation. "Why? I took care of it, didn't I? Now I got all of them." She gave one of the corpses a fierce kick to make her point.

Rafe couldn't help the upward twitch of his lips. "True, but what if it wasn't all of them? They could have been falling back to another group – a trap. You've got to listen, Kage."

"Well it wasn't a fucking-," Kage was halted by the sounds of shots fired, and Rafe's eyes widening as he suddenly fell to his knees clutching his abdomen. "RAFE!" Jaffa surrounded them, their staff weapons firing off in rapid succession. Dodging the shots she grabbed hold of Rafe's vest and dragged him in behind a large tree.

"Bitch, I told you," Rafe coughed, trying to make it sound like a joke as he coughed up blood through a smile.

"Shit, hold on!" Kage breathed, quickly trying to assess the situation. There were a lot more of them, and this time she didn't have the element of surprise or the benefit of more soldiers. Closing her eyes she began focusing her magic through her veins, preparing for an ultimate attack. The sky began to darken and there was a clap of booming thunder. Opening her eyes she focuses all her energy at the Jaffa, "THUNDAGA!" The sky lit up with a blinding light as lightning struck the Jaffa around them. Bodies fell as the light subsided and the sky returned to its normal state. Kage gasped, bracing against the tree as she felt a wave of weakness overcome her.

"Kage!"

Kage opened her eyes and saw her team running for her. "Rafe, he's been hit!"

"Shit!" Ramirez knelt beside Rafe and placed her hand on top of his on the wound. "Don't you dare fucking die on me, sir."

"Wouldn't dream of it, babe," Rafe smiled weakly.

Connors grabbed hold of Kage and lifted her to her feet before slamming her into the tree. "This is why you fucking follow orders!" He shouted angrily, his eyes full of fury. "Heal him!"

"I-I can't," Kage responded, her eyes darting down to her fallen comrade.

"What the hell do you mean, you can't?" Connors growled, digging his arm into her chest.

Kage winced in pain. "I don't do white magic. I can't heal."

"Stupid girl!" Connors let her fall to the ground. "We are hours away from the Stargate and any kind of help! If he dies, it is on you!"

Kage had no response as her team leader ran off asking for Mira. Bentley and Ramirez were glaring at her. "I…I'm sorry."

"Sorry don't cut it, idiota! Putting yourself at risk is one thing, but now Rafe is hanging on!" Ramirez hissed.

Kage flinched at Ramirez's words. As she looked at Rafe's paling face she felt true guilt for the first time in her life towards someone other than Kashoku.

It had been almost three whole weeks in which Kashoku hadn't had to call upon one of her team mates for a ride. The drive that morning was wet and gloomy as far as the weather went, but there was a pleasant chatter between the two as they drove towards the base of the mountain.

"I've got a briefing as soon as we get there," Daniel chimed in. "You can wait in my lab if you want, but I don't really know how long it'll take."

Kashoku shook her head, "No, it's fine. I'm sure I have a few things I could work on in my own office. You should be done by lunch time, right? We could meet up then."

"Yeah, of course," Daniel smiled. "12:30 sound ok? I'll swing by your office."

"Works for me," Kashoku grinned happily. "Let me know if you get caught up. I don't think we have anything going on today really. I'm going to check up on Janet and see how their journey with White Mage is going."

"I'm sure she'd appreciate," Daniel agreed.

They parted ways at the locker rooms as usual and Kashoku headed for the infirmary. It had been fairly quiet there the last week with no major casualties coming through the gate. "Long time no see!"

Janet looked up from her clipboard and smiled, "And it's a good thing, too. I prefer it when I start to forget faces around here. What are you doing here so early?"

Kashoku took a seat on one of the stools by the cart Janet was working by and shrugged. "I was thinking about how we hadn't talked about your magic progress in a while. I just wanted to make sure it was still going well."

"So far so good," the doctor responded gleefully as she flipped the page and began scribbling a few more notes. "A few of us have hit what seems like a plateau, but you did warn that would happen with the higher level magic."

Kashoku gave a firm nod, "It will probably be like that for a while, but keep with it! It'll be worth it."

"Are you kidding? It already has been with all the lives I know we've saved because of Spira's magic. Kind of makes me feel like dishing all that money out for med school was a waste," she jested as she put down her clip board and began firing up the various monitors around the clinic. "So, how are things on your end of the world? Things still going well with SG-15?"

"They are a handful," Kashoku chuckled as she watched Janet work, "but I can definitely call them family. Kage seems to be getting along well with her team. I'm happy. It makes me feel a little more at ease when I'm away from her."

"Well, I haven't had to set any broken bones because of her, so I'll say things are going fairly well. So, what about Daniel?" Janet cast a questioning glance in Kashoku's direction.

The tone Janet had used caused Kashoku to roll her eyes. "What is it with people here thinking they know everything?"

"Because the SGC is like a small town. Everyone knows everything," Janet explained. "Well?" She even made it a point to stop working and wait for an answer.

Kashoku shook her head, but with a smile. "Fine, actually. Better than ever. I'll admit things were rocky for a while, but things have been really good the past few weeks."

"Good," Janet nodded, satisfied. "Well, I hate to kick you out, but we have a team coming back early I need to prepare for."

Kashoku hopped off the stool, "Sure thing. Let me know if you guys need any help!" The office was quiet as far as her teammates went, as some sort of yearly reports were due that all three men were diligently working on. It was nice to see that when they needed to be serious, they could be. It left Kashoku to read more of the book Daniel had given her on Japan's history. She couldn't help but let her eyes wander to the clock every so often in anticipation of her lunch date with Daniel. Unable to contain herself when the clock finally struck noon she opened up the messaging system between members at the SGC and began typing away: We still on for 1230? There was no immediate response, but Kashoku figured Daniel had stepped away or wasn't paying attention to his computer at the time, but as 1225 started to approach she grew nervous.

"Thank GOD," Wells groaned as he stretched up and out of his chair. "Finished with these god-awful things."

"Major Ellis dismissed us for the day as soon as we were done. Lunch?" Carr asked as he too began stretching around in his area.

"Fuck yeah, I'm starving," Wells responded. "Rodd, you in?"

"Sure," he nodded.

"Kash?"

Kashoku looked at the clock. 1228. "I have plans already, but I'm good, thanks," she smiled, hiding the nervousness with a stroke of her hand through her hair. "Have fun."

"Well, you've got at least ten minutes to change your mind," He grinned as popped his back with a few twists before all three headed for the door.

Kashoku watched with a heavy sigh, hoping Daniel would suddenly take their place. But the minutes continued to tick on and there was no response from him on the messenger and no sign of him showing up in the office. There was a brief moment of excitement as she heard someone enter, but it was squashed in disappointment when she realized it was just Carr.

"Phone. Kind of need that," he explained as he walked over to his desk.

Kashoku looked once more at the clock. 12:55. "Hey, Robbie?"

Carr stopped a few feet from the door on his way out, "Sup?"

Kashoku turned in her chair and bit at her lip, contemplating her next string of words. "Um. Is the offer for lunch still on the table?"

His brow furrowed in confusion. "Thought you had a date already?"

Kashoku shrugged, doing her best to play it off, "Rescheduled. No big deal. I won't take long changing."

"Yeah, no problem, we'll wait," Carr assured her.

Kashoku placed her bookmark and closed the cover. "Thanks! I'll meet you in the parking lot!" On her way down she thought better of it, but decided to take a stop by Daniel's office – just in case. Hopeful, she opened the door and stuck her head in. Daniel wasn't there. Closing her eyes with heavy disappointment she closed the door and walked off.

True to their promise, all three men were waiting just outside security for her. "Sorry," she apologized as she quickly made for them. "Had to make a quick stop before coming up here. So, where to?"

"Salsa Brava?" Carr suggested. "I'm craving some indigestion right now something fierce."

"Oh!" Kashoku's eyes lit up. "That's the place with the really good margaritas, the watermelon ones, right? We aren't on duty anymore, so-o-o-o."

"Salsa Brava it is," Wells grinned and opened the passenger side door for Kashoku as they approached his vehicle.

The quaint Mexican restraint wasn't far into the edge of the city coming down off the mountain, so they had frequented it. It was buzzing with a busy lunch crowd, but they still managed to be seated immediately upon their arrival. It was here Kashoku learned of Rodd's fondness of spicy foods to the point his entire face turned a far brighter red than his hair could ever be.

"God, damn, woman," Carr interjected their conversation as he checked his phone again. "She is blowing me up over here. As soon as I told her I had the afternoon off it's been one thing after another."

"So go hang out with her," Wells suggested with an apparent tone.

Rodd took another huge chunk of salsa with his chip. "Do you not want to hang out with her?"

"Not when she wants me to go with her to get a pedicure!" He cried defensively. "She seriously tries to tell me it's ok for guys to get them and that it would make my feet look nicer. No self-respecting man gets a pedicure!"

"What's a pedicure?" Kashoku frowned as she took another sip of her margarita through her straw.

Carr contorted his face into one of disgust. "Blegh, it's a wallet sucking rite of passage for women. You should ask Michelle to take you out for one someday."

"Hmm," Kashoku agreed, curious about what it could possibly be. Suddenly she felt her back pocket begin to vibrate. Setting her drink down she reached around and pulled out her phone. It was Daniel. For a moment she contemplated ignoring it, but she figured she might as well hear his excuse. Maybe it was understandable. She hoped it was. "Moshi Moshi?" However this conversation was going to go, it was not going to be where her teammates could understand it.

"Where are you?" Daniel asked irritably.

Kashoku twitched in surprise at his tone. "At lunch."

"Where? I came looking for you and couldn't find you anywhere."

Seriously? Kashoku couldn't believe he was trying to put this on her. It was almost two hours past when they had agreed to meet already. "Well,Daniel, as 1230 came and went, and you were nowhere to be found, I decided to take up a better offer that was extended to me."

"Why didn't you come looking for me?"

"Yatta!" Kashoku responded angrily, her ability to keep this under wraps quickly failing as her teammates began staring at her in concern.

"Oh…wait, when?" Daniel asked.

Sure, now he started acting apologetic. "I messaged you around noon to confirm, and then I waited almost thirty minutes past 1230 before I came to your office and you weren't there, Daniel! Why weren't you there?"

There was a huge sigh on the other side of the line. "I…lost track of time."

"You forgot," Kashoku corrected.

"I got caught up working on some stuff with Sam."

"Understandable, Daniel, but I thought I made it clear to let me know if you got caught up! I was a phone call away. How hard would that have been?"

"You're right…I'm sorry. I'll make it up to you tonight?"

Kashoku could feel her anger diminishing as she let her body relax out of the tension, but she wasn't quite sure if she was going to let him go that easily. "Maybe. I don't know. But unlike some people, I'll give you a definitive answer. Ja." Hanging up her phone she waited for the bombardment of questions.

"So…," Carr began slowly, but then no nothing else came out of it from anyone before he pulled his own phone back out. "You know, I should call Michelle and tell her you'd love a girls' day out. I can drop you off wherever."

"Actually, getting away from all this testosterone sounds fantastic," she agreed, "No offense."

"I feel the same way most of the time," Rodd commented under his breath.

"Hey, baby," Carr cooed over the phone, "The guys and I kind of already have plans, but Kashoku would love for you to take her out on the town. She just informed me she has no idea what a pedicure is….Uh-huh, I KNOW, right?...Yeah, the one over by Wellington Boulevard? Ok, we can be there in about twenty minutes. Love you!"

"Well, there you go," Wells smiled, "Relax with a spa day." He turned back towards Carr, "So are we going to go do something?"

"Hell yeah, let's go shoot some shit. Rodd needs some practice anyway," Carr grinned.

"You will be nice to him," Kashoku demanded before downing the rest of her drink.

"I was being serious, I'm going to help him, I swear," Carr defended himself.

Rodd gave a sigh. "That is yet to be seen."

"Meet you boys at Dragonman's," Carr said as he pulled out his wallet to pay his bill. Kashoku followed him to his car and they took off. "Don't let Michelle spend all your money. Give her the opportunity and she will," he warned.

Kashoku giggled, "I'll just blame you and make you pay for it all if it comes to that."

Rafe hadn't been the only casualty, and Mira had called in their medical forces that came in means much quicker than foot. They were lucky. The medics were able to stop the bleeding long enough to get Rafe to the Stargate.

Hammond was less than pleased to see one of his people injured. "What the hell happened?" He barked at Connors as Rafe was taken away to the infirmary.

Kage clenched her jaw in anticipation for Connors to start blaming her.

Connors did indeed pay her a glance, but with a deep breath he explained, "Ambush. Thought we had them, but they had another party waiting in the rear for us. The Gwarrins had medics that were able to patch him up until we got him here safely, sir."

Hammond seemed satisfied with the answer. "I want everyone to the infirmary to make sure you are all alright. I want the full report on my desk before end of business."

Connors nodded, "Yes, sir."

Kage swallowed in shock. He hadn't told on her, but she imagined this was far from over as she made to walk away with the others and he grabbed hold of her arm painfully, stopping her in her tracks.

"My office. Right. The Fuck. Now," he growled.

Kage nodded and began following the man on his heels and in silence to his office. When he slammed the door behind her all hell broke loose. He had her backed into a corner quick, and never before had Kage felt so beneath someone.

"Who the fuck do you think you are, girl?" He barked angrily, his face centimeters from hers. "When I give you a fucking order you follow it. You may be used to giving everyone in Spira the finger, but that won't fly with me. This is Earth, and here you are a lowly piece of scum who only does what she is told." He paused, looking intently upon Kage's face. He might have been waiting for her to offer a response, but she gave none. "I should be marching right up to General Hammond's office and telling him every little detail of what happened. Do you honestly think you'd just be sent back to Spira if he knew you were the reason Rafe almost died? You are wrong. Your ass would spend the rest of its immortal life in the deepest, darkest hole in the SGC to rot."

Kage swallowed, "He wouldn't."

"Shall we test that theory?!" Connor asked. He sucked in a heavy breath before taking a step back. Kage did not move. "Too many people die here every year, Kage, and I will never have one of those casualties be from my team because of defiance, do you understand me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?"

"Yes!" Kage hissed.

"This isn't Spira. We don't have white magic and fucking unicorns. Kashoku will not be there to fix all your fuck ups, so you better not have any." Arms crossed he added, "This was your one. Anymore, and I will personally escort you to your eternal damnation, you hear me?"

He waited for no answer before slamming the door and leaving Kage in the darkened office.

Michelle was grinning as she scurried up and engulfed Kashoku in a hug. "Hey! I'm so excited we get to hang out outside of the bar! I couldn't believe it when Robbie told me you've never had a pedicure before." The woman took her hand and began dragging her into the salon. "We need to get two pedicures," she smiled to the receptionist before dragging Kashoku over to a wall with hundreds of bottles filled with color. "Pick out a color!"

"What for?" Kashoku asked, overwhelmed by all the choices.

"Your toes!" Michelle exclaimed as she began searching through the various options.

That's when Kashoku took notice of the few women that were there, their feet soaking in water while the women used the color on their toenails. "Oh!" Now she understood. Going through the rows she finally picked a bright pink polish with glitter in it. Michelle had picked out a dark red and was pulling her towards the chairs. It didn't take long after dipping her feet into the warm water that Kashoku understood why Michelle loved this so much. "This feels amazing," she remarked as her feet were massaged.

"I know, right?" Michelle agreed as she took a sip of her wine. "I bet Robbie would totally enjoy this if he would just come in here, but he feels it would wound his pride too much. Believe it or not, tons of guys come in here!"

"Well, I understand why he wouldn't," Kashoku said as she allowed herself to sink deeper into the massage chair.

"Speaking of men," Michelle sat up straight with a grin, "How are things with yours? Having lots of amazing sex?"

"Actually," Kashoku frowned, "We haven't had sex in well…a while."

"What!?" Michelle shrieked.

"I've never really thought about it until now, but now that I think about it, I realize that we just don't have sex. We're either too busy fighting or trying so hard to make up with each other."

"Uh, make-up sex?" Michelle offered.

Kashoku shrugged, "I dunno, I guess Daniel is just not interested in it. Can I ask you a question?"

"Sure," Michelle nodded.

"You and Robbie have been married a while, right?"

"Almost five years," she nodded.

"Every time I try and ask relationship advice from people they are always predisposed to a biased opinion. Daniel and I have been up and down a lot lately. Our fights are always stupid and seem to last forever, but when we are happy things are great. I mean…I love it when things are great between us. It reminds me why I came so far to be with him, but when things are bad…"

"You wonder if it's worth it?" Michelle finished. "Well, I don't know Daniel personally, and I don't know much about your relationship. What I do know is that a little fighting is completely normal, but if you guys are fighting as often as it sounds like, you need to address the issue. Have you talked with him about it?"

Kashoku shook her head. "We've talked about it once or twice, but not really."

"Well, then you need to start with that. You've been dating long enough to know whether or not this is going to work long-term, you just have to see if you can answer yourself honestly. But enough of this, it's depressing! We're supposed to be pampering ourselves today!" She grinned as she took another sip of her wine. "What should we do next?"

Kashoku gave an unknowing shrug. "I don't really know."

"Oh!" Her eyes lit up. "We should totally do a complete makeover. I mean, with all your traditional up bringing you've probably never really had a transformation. Now that you are branching out into the real world, you should have a new look to show for it!"

Kashoku was intrigued, but had no idea what a makeover entailed. "So, what exactly do we do?"

"Your hair! We should totally get your hair done! My stylist is usually pretty booked, but I totally bet I can call in a favor, hold on." Michelle was quickly reaching for her phone and putting it up to her ear.

Kashoku wondered what exactly Michelle planned to do to her hair. She couldn't ever remember having anything different than what it currently was, but she was curious. There were so many different fashions on Earth that there were endless possibilities. What she ended up with, however, was not what she had expected.

"Come in," Hammond's voice called from behind his office door.

Connors entered, standing at parade rest behind the general's desk. "Sir."

Hammond motioned for him to take a seat. "I hear Major Rafe is doing just fine."

Connors sat and gave a nod. "Yes, sir. Spoke with him a few moments ago. He was being discharged."

"So what's on your mind, son?" He asked with folded hands.

Connors rubbed absently at his chin. "I want clearance for Kage."

Hammond looked away with a soft huff. "Colonel, a few good mission reports isn't enough to get her off-base access."

"I'm not asking for full clearance, sir. I just need a restricted pass. She would always be under full surveillance of the team," he assured.

Hammond straightened out of curiosity. "Why the sudden request?"

"It's no secret that my team is full of hot-heads, sir. We are the delinquents, and sometimes my delinquents tend to stray a little. My methods for team-bonding are somewhat unconventional, but they work," Connors explained.

"And these unconventional methods require off-base access," Hammond continued on for him. Connors simply nodded in response. With an unsure sigh he responded, "I make no promises on what the Pentagon will agree to given her track record."

"I understand, sir," Connors nodded and rose out of his chair.

"I'll let you know when I know, then." Connors turned to leave, but Hammond stopped him. "And Colonel…Is there something that happened on this last mission I should know about?"

Connors lifted his chin. "Nothing that isn't already in the mission report, sir."

Hammond narrowed his eyes in doubt, but nodded. "Dismissed."

Kashoku couldn't stop looking at herself in the mirror. She wasn't even sure she was looking at herself anymore. She had expected a cut, a different style, but this. Instead of cutting her hair they added fake strands to it, giving it fullness and length, and they had changed the color of her hair. That kind of thing was not heard of on Spira. Instead of the honey brown her hair used to be, it was a light blonde. She looked nothing like herself.

"Look at you!" Michelle beamed. "New, hair, new outfit! You look so young and fresh! Daniel won't be able to resist you, now!"

Kashoku had to admit that it did make her feel younger and fresh, and the royal blue of her romper really made everything pop with the shade of her hair. She wasn't even sure if it was possible, but her eyes looked wider than ever. "It's so different! It's going to take a while to get used to it but…" She turned and smiled, "I think I like it!"

"I have the night off, so we should totally get the guys and hang out at McCabe's to celebrate the new you! Invite Daniel!" She suggested.

Kashoku wondered what Daniel would think of her new look. "I don't know. Everyttime I do invite him out he never comes."

Michelle gave a shrug as she crossed her legs on the bench of the dressing room. "Never hurts to try. Today may be the day, right?"

Kashoku supposed it would be a peace offering if she invited him out after their fight from earlier. Running her hand through her long blonde locks she smiled with a nod. "Ok! I'll call and let him know."

"Great!" Michelle grinned. "I'll let the boys know, but first we need a new outfit for me!"

"But of course," Kashoku agreed. Carr had been absolutely right about his wife, but this was the most fun Kashoku had had in a very long time. Hanging out with her team was fun, but there was something to be said for being around another woman. Michelle tried on several combinations before finally settling on one and both women wearing their new outfits out. The sun was almost beneath the horizon when they pulled in to McCabe's. Kashoku hadn't heard back from Daniel, to her disappointment, but she wasn't going to let it ruin her night.

The pub was already buzzing with people, many of whom Kashoku recognized from around the SGC. It really was like their little hangout. Scanning the bar she spotted Wells, Carr, Bentley, and Ramirez around a pool table. Kashoku bumped Michelle's shoulder to get her attention, "There they are!"

"Great! I'll go get us some drinks and meet you over there," Michelle gave her arm a squeeze before heading for the bar.

Kashoku's heart was thumping wildly in anticipation. Would they like it? Or would they think it looked awful? Hands clasped behind her back she approached the table as Wells bent down to take a shot. "Hey guys!"

Wells botched the shot completely. Carr began choking on the beer he had been drinking, Bentley flashed a grin a mile wide before beginning a series of cat-calls, and Ramirez cocked in interested hip with a smirk.

"Well, well, puta!" Ramirez purred. "Look at you, all blonde and fierce."

"And here I thought you couldn't get anymore damn sexy, MHMMM!" Bentley licked his lips before receiving a pool stick to the gut from Ramirez. "Ouch!"

Carr finished with his coughing fit, pounding his fist to his chest a few more times for good measure before putting in his thoughts. "Wow. Michelle went to town on you."

Kashoku laughed, pleased that they all seemed to like it. "She certainly holds nothing back. A new look for the new me!" Her eyes flashed to Wells who hadn't said anything yet. He was in the process of lighting a new cigarette, his cheeks flushed red. She wondered if it was because he had been drinking, or something else. "Well? What do you think?"

He took a long drag of his cigarette before puffing out the smoke in three rings and smiling. "I think you make anything look beautiful."

Kashoku lowered her eyes bashfully before Michelle approached with two drinks and two shot glasses. "Shots?"

"We have catching up to do," she mentioned plainly, nodding towards all the empty glasses.

"Damn, girl, you make that hair work," a smooth voice spoke from across the table.

"There you are!" Ramirez spoke with a huff towards the newcomer, Rafe. "I've been having to play with this asshole since you decided to be late."

"Hey! We almost won…every time," Bentley grinned.

Ramirez rolled her eyes, "You mean every time you sunk the eight-ball in? Yeah. Ok."

"You said we were solids!" He argued back jokingly, purposely trying to irritate her.

Kashoku laughed as she picked up her shot and she and Michelle clunked glasses before downing the liquor. It was fire going down – whatever it was – but she managed not to cringe too much. "Do you play?"

"Me?" Michelle gave an offended snort. "Of course I play."

Not only did Michelle play, but she was almost as good as Wells who was the best player among them. She and Carr had almost beaten her and Wells – not like Kashoku really contributed any. Wells carried them with ease. With another game done Kashoku noticed several of them out of drinks. "I'll go get another round!" She placed her stick against one of the columns and began heading towards the bar. Not paying much attention to where she was going she collided with a large body. "Oh, I'm so-Teal'c!"

Teal'c was beaming down at her with an amused smile. "Kashoku Yoshiko…you have done something with your hair. And when we are off-base, I am known as Murray."

"Murray?" Kashoku laughed. "Well, ok, then. And it might be a little different. Daniel! You came!" Her heart fluttered in excitement at seeing him there, but it quickly slowed back down at his expression. "You don't like it?"

Daniel coughed and shook his head, "Ah-no-no, it's not that. It's just it's really different. I'll just have to get used to it, is all."

Kashoku tried to smile, but there was a clear disappointment in her face. Thankfully, Sam saved the day as she approached with a huge grin.

"Kash! Welcome to the blonde club!" She handed Teal'c and Daniel a beer, O'Neill hot on her heels.

"Thanks!" Kashoku grinned, her spirits bubbling once again.

Even Colonel O'Neill had something nice to say about it after a sip of his beer. "Can never have enough blondes, I always say."

"We're all playing pool, if you want to join," Kashoku offered.

"Oh, I haven't played in a while, that sounds great," Sam agreed.

"Don't let her or Daniel fool you," O'Neill warned, "They are sharks, I tell you. Sharks!"

"Well, Brandon and I have beaten everyone so far, so let's see them give it their best shot," she winked towards Daniel who only cleared his throat.

"You play?" He asked.

"Not well," she giggled. "Brandon kind of does everything. I'm pretty sure he just let's me have a turn so he can have a smoke break. I'm getting better, though. I'm going to get some more drinks and I'll be right over so we can play!" She beamed. Daniel, though, stayed behind.

He had his hands in his pockets and rocked back on his heels. "So…why did you do it?"

Kashoku got a foreboding sense of doom with his words. "I thought it would be fun. Changing hair color isn't really something we do on Spira, so when Michelle suggested it, I did it. Besides, I am trying to fit in here, so what better way than this?" The bartender approached her and she placed her order with a smile.

"You aren't fitting in, Kashoku, you are completely immersing yourself in Earth culture," he frowned disapprovingly.

Kashoku turned her body so that she was facing him, hand on her hip. "Why does that bother you? I thought that was the whole point, Daniel."

"You're completely throwing away your Spira culture!" He explained with tense shoulders behind wild hand movements.

"What?" Kashoku questioned in disgust. "How dare you accuse me of throwing away my heritage! I will always be Spiran, but I am not like Teal'c. I will not be limit myself to the confines of the SGC just to keep my authenticity intact!" The bartender returned with her drinks and she thanked him with a bright smile before shooting a glare back at Daniel. "We aren't fighting. I don't want to fight, Daniel."

"I don't either," he agreed, "but I just don't understand."

"Neither do I! Why are you so upset because I changed the color of my hair?"

"It has nothing to do with your hair, Kashoku, it's about the fact you are making all these life-altering decisions lately without me," he argued back.

Kashoku looked like she had been slapped. "Since when do I have to have your permission to do anything?"

"No! I-," Daniel rubbed his hand across his face. "I'm so bad at this. That's – that's not what I mean, either." Taking in a deep breath he re-collected his thoughts, trying to figure out how to put them together in the right manner. "We were supposed to do all of this together. I was supposed to show you Earth and all its wonders."

Kashoku's shoulders slumped and her gaze fell to the floor. "So that's what it's about. You're upset I'm seeing the world without you."

"Yes," Daniel breathed, finally able to get his point across.

Kashoku felt genuinely guilty, remembering their talks on Spira about it. All the things Daniel promised to take her to go see and do. None of it had happened, and there was never any talk of it now that she was here. "I'm sorry you feel that way, Daniel, I am, but I can't wait around for you forever."

"Do you mean that just for cultural experiences, or relationships, too?"

Kashoku's eyes darted up at him in surprise at the question. Her jaw clenched in irritation at the accusation as she gathered the drinks in her hands, shots in between her fingers. "There's a game to be played." She set the drinks down at the table. She could tell from all the looks they all suspected something, but she tried to put on her best smile to make it think their conversation was of a positive nature. Unfortunately, they hadn't been too discrete at a distance.

"You know," Michelle began as she approached the table. "I always find that the best way for a guy to realize how good he has it, is to make him think he might lose it."

"I would never cheat on Daniel," Kashoku said, shooting down her friend's suggestion.

"I didn't say that," she said defensively. "I'm just saying…guys love blondes. And you know what they say: Blondes have more fun."

Kashoku didn't know they said that, but she wasn't going to bring that up. She didn't want to hurt Daniel, despite their dispute. But…maybe she should remind him how easy it would be to lose her. Flipping her hair over her shoulder she grabbed two shot glasses and strutted over to Wells with a smile, handing him one of the glasses. "To victory."

Wells gave a smug smile, his hand holding the shot snaking around her arm so that they were linked together before taking the shot simultaneously. "To victory."

"You can break," Kashoku smiled towards Daniel, who glared at her behind his glasses.

"We play winner!" Rafe called in quickly before anyone else could take claim.

"Why? So you can lose again?" Kashoku teased as Daniel racked the balls.

"Baby, we ain't gonna lose this time," Rafe promised. "Wells can't carry you forever!"

Wells gave a playful snort. "You wanna put drinks on that, sir?"

"Wells, I know your strategy," Rafe admitted. "You use this pretty little thing as distraction, and I'll admit it works pretty damn well."

"I don't know what you mean," Kashoku hummed as she bent over the pool table, positioning her stick at the cue ball and giving her hips a shake.

"I do!" Bentley raised a hand and then turned towards Ramirez. "Baby, why don't you ever do that for me, huh? I'd do it for you!"

"Go ahead. It'll be easier to ram the stick up your ass that way," Ramirez responded, drawing an eruption of laughter from her peers.

"Oh the EO violations I could report from this," O'Neill hummed.

Sam smiled and gave a nod, "I would say so, sir." Teal'c stood beside her, grinning at the banter between teammates.

"I won't tell if you won't, sir," Carr grinned.

"With the way you all act, you'd think you were enlisted and not officers," he rebutted playfully, having no real intentions of telling on anyone.

"Because some of us were!" Bentley grinned as he held his drink up in cheers.

Daniel was not amused by any part of the conversation, eyes locking with Kashoku before she shot. She didn't make it, but she left very little choice for Sam in the way of play-making.

The game went on, the two teams fairly even. O'Neill had been right in saying Sam and Daniel made a good team. Kashoku had not played much in the way of offense, but had done a good job defensively. It was her shot and her options were well…there wasn't really any. She looked at the table thoughtfully before leaning down and lining up in front of a ball, but she began questioning it. A warm body pressed up against her and adjusted her pole.

"You'll have to shoot it like that to make this shot," Wells told her.

Kashoku pressed back slightly, contemplating it, but realizing it was not a shot she could do. "What about behind my back?"

Wells nodded as he pulled his cigarette from his mouth. "You'll get the easiest angle that way, but it's harder to control the stick."

Kashoku hopped up onto the table and readjusted her stick.

"Hey! One foot on the ground at all times!" O'Neill called out.

"We all agreed she could be the exception," Carr explained. "Otherwise, it would be a little unfair."

Kashoku stuck her tongue out playfully as she crossed her legs and rolled her shoulders back to get her lower back out of the way of the stick. She knew that the position was suggestive, and she looked up at Daniel and then smirked at Wells before sinking the ball with her shot.

"Nice shot!" Sam praised.

Daniel looked like he was holding his tongue as he sucked in a deep breath and looked away from Kashoku. She swallowed, realizing that maybe she was overdoing it. Hoping off the table she began evaluating her next move, her body stiff and straight as she prepared for the next shot. She missed, not to her surprise.

Suddenly, Kashoku wasn't having fun anymore.

It had almost been impossible to catch Rafe alone away from the rest of the team, but two days after the incident, Kage was able to catch him in the gym on his own. He was lifting weights as she hesitantly approached him. "Hey."

He looked over and smiled as he continued to pump out the reps. "Hey, yourself."

Kage placed her hands in her back pockets. "I'm…I'm sorry."

Rafe stopped. Putting down the weights he picked up his towel and wiped at his forehead. "We've all been there."

Kage scoffed. "You've almost gotten someone killed?"

"Sure," Rafe answered with a shrug. "We all have. Why do you think Colonel Connors thought you'd fit right in?"

Kage's eyes narrowed in uncertainly. "So what, Connors thinks he can just tame everyone?"

Rafe laughed, "The Colonel ain't tamed nobody. He just knows how to re-direct. We've all disobeyed direct orders, but we pay the price. You've just got decide if you are willing to pay it." Taking a swing of his water he stood. "You look like you could vent a little. Why don't you take it out on me?"

"So…we're good?" Kage asked cautiously.

Rafe grinned, "Yeah, we good. And don't worry about Bentley and Ramirez. They'll be over it by tomorrow. Come on, I ain't gonna hold out on you this time."

Daniel watched as O'Neill stretched his arms up towards the blue sky of Tullin, breathing in the crisp morning air. They had yet to approach any civilization, but they were walking along a trail that held human footprints. The grass was bright green, and although there were plenty of trees around, they weren't in the middle of a forest which was refreshing.

"Remind me to have one less beer next time," O'Neill muttered as he cracked his neck.

"I attempted to tell you to stop while you were ahead more than once, O'Neill," Teal'c mentioned casually.

"Yeah, yeah," O'Neill scoffed.

Sam laughed. "It was fun last night, sir."

"For some," O'Neill agreed, casting a glance towards Daniel who was seemingly ignoring the conversation. "Daniel?"

"Hm?"

"Not that it's any of my business…,"

Daniel sighed, placing his hands on his hips. "Then why are you asking?"

"Daniel, I expected the two of you to be all over each other last night to the point of making me physically nauseous, and instead you both completely ignore each other. So shoot me if I'm a little more than curious," O'Neill explained.

"Everything between you two ok?" Sam questioned hesitantly.

"As much as I appreciate your concern, it really is none of your business," Daniel shot back.

"Do you want some advice?" O'Neill asked as he casually walked along.

With an irritated sigh Daniel removed his glasses to begin cleaning them. "No, but you're going to give it anyway."

O'Neill grinned before turning serious. "Daniel, I'll be the first to admit that I didn't really approve of the two of you in the beginning, but I think we'll all agree that the two of you had a…connection," he accompanied the word with air quotes. "And I think in some parallel universe that I'm sure Carter could give you coordinates to, the two of you are hitting it off nicely.

"But?"

"But, I think we all expected Kashoku's presence at the SGC would be a lot like Teal'c, and it's not."

Teal'c gave an agreeing incline of his head. "Indeed, Kashoku Yoshiko has shown a high interested in assimilating with your culture, and has succeeded in doing so."

"So what are you trying to say, Jack?" Daniel asked as he put his glasses back on.

"I'm saying that you are a 35-year-old guy who is ready to settle down in his life when he's not gallivanting across the galaxy, and she's someone who has the appearance of a 21-year-old. And what do 21-year-olds like to do, Daniel? They like to drink, and party, and have no attachments," he said. Daniel gave no verbal response, but the slump in his shoulders told it all. "Look, I'm not saying it won't work itself out, but just think about it." He placed a comforting hand on his friend's shoulder.

Daniel gave a nod. "Yeah."

He couldn't stop thinking about it.


	3. Chapter 3

Kage tugged at the band keeping her hair up as she descended the ramp. Bentley called their encounter with the race known as the Jibta a 'minor scuffle' – and maybe it had been for someone who hid in the rear the entire time – but Kage had come away from it a little worse than what she would have liked. It was nothing even a basic white magic spell couldn't cure, but her hair had gotten matted in tangles and it was driving her insane. With one final tug the strands broke free around her shoulders.

"Do you attract trouble or what?" Ramirez teased as she came to a halt next to the other woman.

Kage gave an annoyed huff. "Considering I'm only brought on missions where there intends to be trouble, I'd say that's an unfair assessment." Combing her fingers through her hair she straightened the strands back out and gave a smirk over her shoulder. "But, yes. It does tend to follow me."

"Get yourselves cleaned up and to the briefing," Connors ordered as he swung his weapon off of his shoulder.

There was a collective nod from SG-11 as they began to file their way out into the hallway, but Hammond approached Connors with hushed words before they'd gotten far. The team leader turned to lock eyes on Kage. She swallowed hard, mind racing back towards the mission and what she could have possibly fucked up this time.

"Kage, Hammond's office. He has something he wants to address before the meeting. Let's check our weapons back in to the armory quickly," Connors spoke plainly. There was no hint of anger in his voice, but Kage had learned that instincts meant nothing with him.

Kage gave a nod and followed on her leader's heels to the general's office. The door was not shut behind them as it usually was in such serious conversations, so the Spiran felt her heart ease its wild thumping. "Is everything ok?"

Hammond tilted his head in astonished confirmation. "I'll cut to the chase since I'm sure you're both tired and would like to get cleaned up. Kage, I'm surprised to tell you that Colonel Connors's request for your off-base access was granted – far quicker than Kashoku's."

Kage was shocked. She hadn't even known that Connors had put in the request, let alone that it would come back so quickly. A part of her lit up with hope of finally being able to get out of the dungeon, but there was still heavy skepticism. "Why? It's been easier for me at every turn to be a part of the SGC once the ball got rolling than it ever was for Kashoku. I had to go through similar psyche tests, but from what I can tell, not as many and they were nowhere near as difficult or as invasive as she said hers were. And now you're telling me your government has given me permission to explore your planet without so much as a stutter. Why?"

"I wouldn't exactly say there was no stutter," Hammond hedged, staring at her with veiled irritation. "Your clearance is limited and subject to reevaluation at any moment. I'll give you the paperwork detailing the demands you're to agree to follow in a moment, but for right now I'll just paraphrase: you're not to go off-base without your team present, nor are you allowed off-base overnight. If there are any incidents, you can kiss the sunlight goodbye. Off-base, you are still under employ of the SGC and will act in a dignified manner. Furthermore, there is to be no magic or mentioning at all of anything alien. Your team has no doubt informed you before, but the people of Earth are not in the know of what this program does. Failure to keep this secret will have dire consequences."

"Yeah, yeah," Kage sighed, holding her hand out for the paperwork Hammond was pulling from the folder in front of him. Two copies were given to her and Connors, one left in front of Hammond. "Can I take this and sign it later or do I have to read it now?"

"Now, I'm afraid," Hammond said, having already signed the copy before him. "The paperwork needs to be filed before you can be allowed off-base and I believe your leader already has something planned for you."

Kage darted her gaze over to Connors, but the man didn't bother looking at her, concentrating instead on the paperwork before him. It reminded Kage that she needed to commit herself to yet more promises if she wanted to get off this damn base and if she couldn't take the paperwork to study and exploit later, then she needed to read it carefully so she could remember it all. Once she got down to it, it wasn't all that bad, basically the rules she'd agreed to when allowed to stay on base. Don't attack anyone, don't draw attention to yourself, don't talk about aliens where you'll be overheard, don't blatantly be an alien. Kage snorted, unkindly wondering how Teal'c ever got off base. Then again, the big guy never seemed to be anywhere but on base. The thought made Kage uncomfortable so she quickly scribbled her name on the last page and her initials at the bottom of each of the previous ones, trading with Connors and Hammond so her signature was on each copy. Given how damn many Hammond had, you'dthink he'd have printed her a copy. But no, the man simply glanced them all over, nodded, and filed them away in his folder. It seemed like in his mind the matter was settled. Not so for Kage.

"Now that that's out of the way, think one of you can actually answer my damn question?"

"What question would that be?" Connors drawled beside her, raising a brow. The motion broke loose a scab of dried blood that had trailed down from a cut just under his hairline, the wound minor and already scabbing over but serving to remind her that the both of them were filthy and no doubt getting muck all over the esteemed general's furniture. Kage smirked back.

"The one where I asked you both why the fuck the authority outside this base are practically wetting themselves giving me passes and shit when they made Kashoku jump through more hoops than a prized chocobo. Don't think I didn't notice you changing the subject earlier with the paperwork," she said dangerously. "What's the deal?"

Hammond straightened, his hands folded tightly together. It was obvious to anyone in the room that he was choosing his words carefully. It caused Kage to scoff angrily inwardly. Connors, however, didn't seem nearly as concerned with not hurting feelings.

"It's because you are a weapon," he said simply, eyes deadlocked with hers. "The Pentagon will always fast-track weapons."

Kage raked her tongue across her upper teeth, eyes hardening as she thought that over. "So then why all the fuss about how I wasn't allowed here in the first place?"

Connors laughed, the unfamiliar sound sending chills down Kage's spine after how long she'd spent having him yell or be cool towards her. "It was never the Pentagon that refused to have you here, Kage. It was General Hammond."

Hammond sucked in a breath, but he didn't refute the comment. There was no regret or shame in his posture at all; if Kage had to bet, she'd say the man still didn't want her around. "Colonel Connors is correct. Had I ever mentioned in any report interest to keep you here, they would have jumped on the opportunity."

"But," Connors continued, "the more dangerous the weapon, the quicker they will cut the cord. Kashoku will always have greater leniency than you ever will here, because she is far less dangerous."

Kage had several thoughts and emotions running through her brain. She was unsure whether to be bothered by this classification or – well – be honored. It could, in many ways, be played to her advantage. "Okay," she offered, backing down with a disinterested shrug. "Can I go now? Caked blood is kind of starting to itch."

Hammond looked like he wanted to somehow correct what Connors had said, but instead he waived her off in dismissal. Kage turned on her heel and casually walked out. She could feel Connors right behind her. "If Hammond was the one that refused to have me here, then who convinced him to let me on a team – you?"

"I did," Connors admitted with a grin. "Not long after you almost broke my second in command."

"If I'm such a threat, why risk having me around?" she scoffed. She turned her head to look at him, trying to read something in the taller man's profile, but he seemed as impenetrable as always. There was caked blood and dirt all over his face, enough it had to have been irritating, but she hadn't seen him rub at it even once except when the blood had trailed too close to his eye during the mission. Connors was just like that, she acknowledged, taking the shit life threw on you in stride until it became a problem, and then handling it as efficiently as possible. It didn't escape her notice that his team, with the exception of the generally well-liked Rafe, seemed to comprise of the most annoying marines on the base, and yet they still got shit done and were more often than not the ones called in to bust other teams out of bad situations. Even Kage was beginning to listen to his orders more, and not just because Ramirez and Bentley were still being big enough dicks that she worried she'd kill them if they gave her more shit over disregarding something Connors said. She was beginning to respect the man and, to her surprise, genuinely wanted to know what he saw in her.

"We are all weapons," he answered, unaware of the direction of her thoughts. "It's simply to what degree. Everyone here on this base belongs to the Pentagon and is only here for a special skill set. You're not as different as you think."

They rounded a corner, their pace slowing as to be able to talk to one another. It made sense, what Connors said, but that still didn't really answer the question. "Hammond has seemed dead set since the beginning to never let me on. How did you convince him?"

Connors smiled and folded his hands behind his back, more open the farther they were from his superior officer. "I played the game. You see, that is the key to getting everything you want while maintaining career success around here."

"The game," Kage murmured, thoughts racing. Sounded a lot more like just manipulating people, but if that were really the game she'd be able to learn it quickly, starting with the rules binding her actions off base. They approached the locker rooms and stopped in front of their respective doors. "So, when do I get to have my first outing? Hammond said you had something in mind already?"

"Tomorrow," he responded. "Ramirez will make sure you have all the necessary equipment for the outing."

Kage raised an eyebrow, personally wondering if Ramirez wouldn't 'forget' some part of that necessary equipment out of spite. Getting Rafe hurt had dried up the woman's good will towards Kage, but if it was an official outing, maybe she'd keep herself in line. "What are we doing?"

Connors opened his door with a dangerously toothy smile and ducked inside with a few ominous parting words: "It'll be a surprise."

Great. With a heavy sigh she pushed her way into the locker room and began stripping off her clothing. Once she had scrubbed all the blood off her body and been given an okay by the infirmary and through the thankfully quick debriefing, she headed off towards SG-15's office. Kashoku was at her desk, staring absently at the computer. Her teammates all had headphones in with similar bored looks. Considering what her day had consisted of, the vacant looks were more than a little irritating, but she pushed that aside. "You okay?" she asked bluntly.

Kashoku jerked at the sound of her voice before letting out a breath of relief. "Oh, yeah, I'm fine. How was your mission?"

Kage raised a brow at the lie, but let it slide as she pushed Kashoku's mouse and keyboard aside to settle on the desk. "Bloody. Just how I like it, but everyone came out okay." Kashoku merely hummed in response, starting to stare into space again, so Kage went for broke. "So… I got clearance."

That regained Kashoku's attention, her newly blonde head snapping back up in surprise. "What? That's great!"

Kage shrugged casually. "It's more like supervised prison. I'm only allowed out for certain time periods and it more or less has to be with the entire team at this point, who if you recall are still mostly pissed at me. I'm pretty sure the only time I'll get to go anywhere is for some team-bonding bullshit Connors has planned."

"But, Kage, you get to leave regardless! This is great news! Give it some time and you'll have more freedom soon enough," Kashoku assured. "And as soon as you do, we'll go have some real fun! There are so many places I want to take you."

"As long as that real fun includes alcohol," Kage agreed with a small smile. "I've really missed the taste of that stuff." Kashoku beamed back, until something in her desk drawer buzzed and her face took on a pinched look. Letting out a sigh, Kage folded her arms and looked straight at her friend. "So… How are things?"

Kashoku hesitated. "Um. Things are great. Why?"

Kage kept herself very still and kept her gaze steady on the other woman's face. When the blonde began to fidget a little, she struck. "Kashoku. Don't lie to me."

With a groan Kashoku let her face fall into her hands. "They are terrible. I thought I was doing the right thing last night, but I only made things worse and now… Read this." Kage twisted her legs out of the way when Kashoku reached for the top desk drawer, pulling out her phone and handing it to Kage.

It was already in the message screen, the tiny digital letters simply reading Let's talk. Kage had to swallow the laugh that wanted to come out. "Ouch. From Daniel, I'm assuming? You know that's the code for 'I want to break up', right? What are you going to do?" The back button revealed a new message she quickly opened. Are you free around lunch?

Kashoku took the phone back and held it close to her chest. "We can't. Not yet. I feel like I can still fix this."

Kage rolled her eyes as she let herself lean up against the desk. "Kash, you've been complaining about how things have been going south for weeks now. Don't you think maybe this is a sign?"

"No," Kashoku snapped firmly.

Kage's eyes narrowed, contemplating if she should argue it, or just let her friend figure it out on her own. Seeing as she had tried route A before, the latter seemed best. "Fine. What exactly are you going to try to do to 'fix' things?"

Kashoku gave a half shrug in uncertainty. "Well, I haven't fully decided yet, but I know part of Daniel's frustration is that I'm kind of exploring and doing new things without him. So…I figured I'd think of something I hadn't done yet and we'd go do it."

"Hmm," was the only response Kage could muster. "Well. Good luck with that." She anticipated a high rate of failure for this event, and kind of hoped for it. It would be better for everyone involved if their fling just ended. "Too bad we aren't on Spira. I'd have the greatest date idea for you."

Kashoku shot her friend a look. "I don't want to know."

Kage responded with an amused snort. "Yeah, yeah. Well, definitely let me know how it goes. I'll start placing some bets with the others." Kashoku shot her another deadly glare, but Kage easily waved it off as she casually made her way out of the office. It would definitely be interesting to see how things panned out. But before she left…

"Ne, Kashy, you may want to figure out that date plan soon. Looks like Jackson's trying to get you pinned down for a nice public breakup."

"What? No!" Kashoku cried, her team jerking at the noise as she stared down at her phone frantically. "Crap! Brandon, hey, let's go get lunch!"

Maybe it was mean, but Kage laughed all the way to the elevator.

Kashoku had found it: the perfect thing to go do. She and Daniel both had half days tomorrow, and although it wouldn't leave a whole lot of time, it was enough. She avoided Daniel the rest of the day, not wanting to give him any excuse to possibly corner her and have their conversation before she could succeed in their outing. The next morning she timed everything perfectly, down to the second. She caught him on his way down to the locker room to change out of his uniform for the day.

"Daniel!" she called cheerfully, waving to him to grab his attention.

He looked surprised, and his brow furrowed as she approached. "Kash, hey… Did you not get my messages?"

Kashoku ignored the question and grabbed his hand to help drag him towards the locker rooms again. "Let's go to the zoo."

Daniel's eyes widened in surprise, and he couldn't help but freeze up in shock. "The… zoo?"

"Yes," Kashoku beamed. "You said you wanted to be the one to explore Earth with me, so let's explore! There are so many animals your planet has that we do not, and who better to see them with than you? You can teach me all about them!"

There was a long hesitation, and Kashoku was sure that he would turn down her offer. "Kash, we really…" Daniel sucked in a deep breath, and Kashoku gave him the best pleading face she had to offer. She needed this, this one last chance. Closing his eyes he let out a sigh and nodded. "Yeah. Sure. Let's go to the zoo."

Kashoku had to bite her lip to contain her excitement. "Good! I'll change and meet you at your car. The weather should be perfect!" She turned and hurried into the locker room, her heart thumping out of her chest. Daniel could have taken the moment and turned it into what she had feared, but he wanted to make this work as much as she did.

The zoo was actually on the mountain and a short distance from the base. Kashoku was thankful for it, as the drive was mostly silent which fueled her nerves. They paid for their tickets and passed through the gates. Kashoku looked at the map and all the different areas. She was only familiar with a few of the animals listed. "Hmm. What should we go see first? Have you ever been here before?"

"Actually, you know, I haven't," Daniel answered thoughtfully. "I can't even remember the last time I went to a zoo. On my travels, I got to see a lot of them up close and personal in their natural environments."

"That must have been so exciting! Well, what was your favorite animal to see?" Kashoku asked, trying eagerly to spark conversation.

"I guess I was always partial to African animals since I spent a lot of time over there," he shrugged.

Kashoku looked at her map. "So the African Rift Valley it is, then. Apparently they have 'giraffes, giraffes, and more giraffes'. Which ones are those?"

The afternoon went far better than Kashoku could have ever hoped for. Kashoku couldn't contain her excitement with each new animal they approached, and Daniel looked like he was thoroughly enjoying explaining everything he knew about each of the animals from habitat, to mating rituals and their place in many religious beliefs. She was genuinely interested, but when the opportunity to potentially pet some of the animals presented itself, she had to take it.

"Look! We can feed the budgies! What are those?" Kashoku asked curiously as she spotted the sign.

"Budgerigar… also known as the parakeet. They are small birds," Daniel explained. "Native to Australia."

"Are they pretty?" she asked.

"They are colorful. Not like a parrot, but they are definitely one of the better looking kinds."

"Come on, let's go feed them!" She tugged at his arm and gladly pulled a couple of ones from her purse to pay for the feeding sticks. Daniel waved on the proffered stick for himself, and told her to keep it for herself. She didn't mind it, excited to have a greater opportunity to get up close and personal. There were very few creatures on Spira that weren't fiends. It didn't take long for several blue and green birds to hungrily make their way for her outreached stick. A blue one landed on her stick and began munching away happily while a green one landed on her shoulder. It cocked its head in curiosity and let out a chirp. Kashoku giggled in delight and brought the feeding stick closer to her face so that she could get a better look at the bird. It lifted its head and reached out its beak, giving Kashoku's nose a slight peck before returning to the food.

"They are so friendly!" Kashoku spoke in awe as birds continued to come and go until the seeds were gone off the first stick. She turned her head towards Daniel, who was offering her a pleasant smile, but the look in his eyes caused her heart to sink. She was unsure of what it was going through his mind at that moment, but she was certain it was not what she was hoping for. With a heavy heart she lifted a hand and gently stroked the bird that was still happily perched on her shoulder. Kashoku was glad that they were almost back to the beginning of the zoo, for she had lost all interest in seeing anything else.

To say Kage was curious was an understatement. When Ramirez showed up at her door, she'd been instructed to wear her least favorite shirt and pants as they were likely to get ruined. Considering all of Kage's clothes except for a few things Kashoku had bought her were issued to her by the base, it wasn't exactly a dilemma finding something. Ramirez herself was wearing an ensemble that closely resembled their SGC uniforms, but had obviously seen some wear and tear. There were interesting random splotches of bright colors Kage figured were some sorts of stains.

"Ready for your first taste of fresh Earth air?" Ramirez grinned as they headed for the outside gate. The Latina's attitude towards Kage that afternoon had settled back into the friendly teasing she'd actually been enjoying up until this last week. Kage wasn't sure how to take it, but decided to cautiously play along. Ramirez didn't seem the type to hold a grudge long, so maybe she was over her protective snit.

Kage shrugged in response, acting like it was no big deal, but she was actually quite relieved to finally be getting out of the SGC, even for a little while. She received a few looks as they passed through security, but she was given the green light and they headed into the garage. Kashoku had told her about their automobiles and she had to admit she was curious how they handled and ran. They came in various sizes, shapes, and colors in the SGC lot, and honestly Kage was glad she had someone with her to keep her on track. Her fingers just itched to take some of them apart. Ramirez led her to a smaller one, its body sleek and the color a loud red that stuck out amongst the rougher, older looking automobiles around it. Of course the woman had an expensive, flashy transport, Kage thought with an inward snort.

"You still won't tell me what we are doing?" she asked as she took her seat on the passenger side, mimicking Ramirez's actions with the seatbelt.

"Nah, where would be the fun in that? I wanna see your face when it sinks in." She grinned as she shifted the car into gear and they were on their way.

There was little in the way of conversation on their journey, Ramirez turning the beat heavy music up loud enough to blow out Kage's ears, and the Spiran was rather occupied taking in the sites. They never travelled very close to the city below, but Kage could see it in the distance. It was large, like Zanarkand, but with a lot more buildings crammed into a single space. They stayed mostly in the mountains, eventually turning off on a dusty side road that didn't seem distinguishable from any of the others they'd passed. There seemed to be absolutely nothing around for several minutes before an arena appeared off to the left, giant multi-colored obstacles within its confines. To its right was a small building with several other vehicles part out front.

Ramirez pulled in next to them and turned off the engine. "Alright, chica, it's game time." She smirked at the Spiran before getting out of the car and popping a hatch in the back. It was filled with guns, different models than the SGC used and strange, but distinct in their design, and masks. Ramirez pulled out the green mask and one of the guns and handed them to Kage. "These will be your best friends for the rest of the day."

Kage settled the mask under her arm and took the gun, inspecting the equipment curiously. What kind of ammo did you use in something like this? The physical bullets the SGC favored wouldn't work, she could tell that immediately. Curiosity began to eat at her. "This is a gun," she stated, but she glanced up at Ramirez as she did so, wanting confirmation that she wasn't holding some sort of prank, something that looked like a gun but wasn't.

"What an astute observation, babycakes," Bentley purred as he came up behind her.

Kage rolled her eyes at his comment, but paid it no real attention. "So what, we're doing some target practice?"

"Yeah, and you're the target," Bentley grinned, something threatening behind the smug look.

Kage frowned, not understanding. She was all about shooting up some people, but she had been told more than once that murder was highly illegal on this world, and she didn't see a single healer around. And even with the bullying her teammates had been giving her, the predatory looks on their faces weren't ones of murder. Still, "You're going to shoot at me with live ammo?"

"Nah, girl, it's just paintballs," Rafe assured her, having pulled up next to Ramirez just a moment before and currently digging through his own gear in the backseat of his large vehicle.

Paintballs? That still made no sense. "I don't –FUCK! OW!" There had been a loud 'pop' before Kage's leg lit on fire, or at least it felt like it had. She looked down and saw a bright green splash of paint where the pain was centered. "What the fuck was that!?"

"WHOA, WHOA, HEY!" Rafe shouted angrily, glaring at Bentley, who had apparently fucking shot her, what the fuck, she was going to murder him. "Safety kill, man! Colonel Connors would destroy your ass if he saw that shit!"

Bentley only giggled with an innocent shrug while Ramirez rolled her eyes and muttered something under her breath in Spanish. She didn't look all that pissed though, a faint smirk on her lips. Kage cringed, swallowing the impulse to attack the asshole back, but that left her with nothing to distract her as her leg pulsed heavily in pain. It may not have been fatal ammo her teammate shot her with, no real damage to her flesh, but that shit hurt like a bitch.

"Speaking of the Colonel, where is he?" Bentley mused as he put the safety back on his weapon.

"Watching everything you idiots have been doing from inside," Connors growled as he exited the small building. "I'll let that one go, just because she deserves it after the last mission." Bentley gave a cough and straightened under the other man's glower. "I think I'll sit this one out, play referee, while the four of you kill each other."

Bentley shot up his hand and bounced up and down eagerly. "I pick Margarita!"

Ramirez let out a loud and irritable groan. "God dammit! No!"

Rafe snorted with amusement. "Nah, that's cool, I'll take Kage. I think the two of you will do great together. Besides," he gave Kage a playful slap against the chest, "this one needs a second chance at watching my six."

Kage cringed at the comment, still guilty for what happened despite the fact Rafe had long since forgiven her for the incident. "So how do we play?"

Connors went through the rules of his game, and although he made it clear that anything within fifteen feet was to be labeled a safety kill, Kage knew that Bentley would probably shoot her point-blank again. The pain had subsided, but she knew the shot would leave a massive bruise and it was going to be stiff to walk on. They put on their masks and gloves and the two teams took their positions on separate ends of the arena, Ramirez having gone through the motions of how to load her weapon with the paintballs.

Rafe lowered his mask as he leaned against the inflatable barrier. "Don't take any mercy, because they won't. Bentley will test his limits on that fifteen feet rule until the Colonel throws him out for being an ass."

"Yeah, well, two can play that game," Kage promised him, lowering her mask and getting in the ready position, waiting for Connors's cue to begin. There was a moment of silence before Connors's voice boomed across the arena.

Rafe instantly gave a hand signal and Kage responded with a curt nod before moving. She was crouched low, and was much swifter than Rafe in moving between the obstacles. Her finger twitched, instincts telling her what she should do next, but she knew there was a point to all of this, and she waited for Rafe's orders. From across the way she saw him point to his eyes and then off towards her right. With a nod she turned swiftly on her heel and laid on the trigger as she spotted Bentley.

The arena erupted in the sounds of chaos, and it was game on.

The drive home was filled with a heavy silence, and when they entered the apartment, Kashoku knew that she had failed. She watched as Daniel dropped his keys on the counter and kicked off his shoes before making his way towards the bedroom. There was no use in putting it off any longer. With a hard swallow she followed him into their bedroom and leaned against the doorframe. "I got your text."

Daniel froze, halfway through unclasping his watch.

Kashoku hung her head. "I got your text, and I knew what it meant, and I wasn't ready for it. I wanted to give us one last chance, because I kept telling myself we could make this work. I thought it was going to work, and then…The way you looked at me." She couldn't bring herself to look at him as her eyes got cloudy with tears. "Where did we go wrong?"

Daniel lifted her chin to look at her and cupped her face in his hands. "We knew this might happen, Kashoku. We took a chance and hoped it would work, but we just," Daniel paused, trying to find the right words, but could only settle with, "We just aren't working."

"But why?" Kashoku asked with an exasperated huff. "There are times when I'm around you that I am the happiest I can remember being, but others I just…"

"I know, believe me, I know." He let out a small laugh. "But, Kash, we are in two completely different places in our lives, and until we catch up with each other this will never work."

"I thought I travelled halfway across the galaxy so that we wouldn't be in two different places," she offered playfully, but she couldn't stop the tear from rolling out of her eye.

Daniel couldn't help but chuckle as he took her into a tight hug. "You aren't ready to give up on the type of living you had on Spira. You still want to go out and have fun until the early hours of the morning, and there's nothing wrong with that. It's just not what I want."

Kashoku pulled away with a nod, knowing that everything Daniel was saying was true, and she had known it. Wiping away at her tears she smiled bravely. "So maybe in a few years?"

There was an upwards twitch of his lip. "Give or take."

"I don't regret it, you know," she assured him. Even though she had given up everything to come to Earth to be with him, he had opened up so many more doors and opportunities that would go on without him.

"Me either. Not for a second," he agreed.

Kashoku nodded gratefully. Shifting her weight nervously she asked, "Just one more night? I just...just want to be with you. Nothing more."

Daniel took her hand and gave it a squeeze. "Come on. Let's go see what I have on hand. I think I have enough to teach you some homemade tempura."

To say that Kage got completely obliterated would have been an understatement. Ramirez and Bentley both paid Rafe little attention and had instead double-teamed her. Rafe hadn't been joking when he said Bentley would test the 15-foot rule, and she had even been a victim of Rafe's friendly fire. Friendly fire her ass. She was certain he had done it on purpose. Her pride would be wounded for months. Dark black and purple bruises splotched her skin, but she didn't have the guts to face anyone in the infirmary. The fewer people that knew about her defeat, the better. Instead, she waited until the following morning and hobbled slowly to SG-15's office.

"Kage, are you okay!?" Kashoku cried in concern as her friend limped in. With a wince Kage lifted her shirt to show off several of her bruises. Kashoku gasped, a hand flying to her mouth. Carr and Wells let out a collective whistle.

"You played paintball, didn't you?" Wells asked, cringing at the sight, while Carr gave a disbelieving laugh, "Your first trip off-base and you went for that? Damn, girl. I give you props for bravery."

"Three against one isn't fair," Kage moaned, lowering her shirt.

Kashoku's eyes widened. "Wait, this is what you did on your outing with SG-11?"

"Yeah, they've got an interesting way of team bonding," Carr nodded, using air-quotes for emphasis. "They totally hazed you."

"Which, they could technically get in severe trouble for," Rodd mused in between fiddling with some device on his desk.

With a disappointed frown Kashoku reached out a hand and had Kage's skin back to normal with the slightest of touches. "I don't like it. You were really hurt."

Kage let out a sigh of relief as her muscles relaxed and the pain subsided. "Yeah, well, I guess I deserved it. And they probably thought I'd go to get healed after they dropped me off. It's whatever, I'm better now, and it was… actually kind of fun when I wasn't getting pelted. So," pulling up a chair she plopped down in it next to Kashoku. "Dodeshita ka?"

Kashoku's body tensed at the question and she bit at her lip before responding, following Kage's lead gratefully in speaking their language. "We had a lot of fun yesterday, but…" She shook her head and gave a shrug. "We talked and… It was mutual."

Kage perked up at what her friend was insinuating. "So the two of you are done?"

Another shrug. "I suppose, but I'm not even sure we were really ever together, you know?"

Kage was giving herself an internal high-five at the news. Finally. Though, when she really looked hard at her friend, she wondered, "You don't seem all that upset."

"Well," Kashoku tucked a curl behind her ear and rested her chin on her hand. "I guess…I'm not. Not much will really change in our relationship bynot being together other than me living here again. We're still friends and that's what really matters."

Kage gave an amused huff. "If you say so. Does your team know yet?"

Kashoku shook her head. "No. I didn't really see much point in advertising it. I guess if someone asked, I'd tell them though."

"Well, at least we get to hang out more, now, neh?" Kage grinned, glad that she finally would get her friend back.

Kashoku gave a genuine smile and they switched the conversation back to English. "Right! You should try and see if you can convince Colonel Connors to have your team bonding at McCabe's with us one night. It would be so much fun!"

"I have a feeling Kage would be the type to start bar fights when she was drunk," Wells mused.

"She is," Kashoku agreed. "There are several incidents on Spira I could recount. It might be wise to let her win at pool every time."

"Hey!" Kage snapped defensively, "I'm not a sore loser… much." Kashoku laughed, and Kage eased comfortably into the seat. Carr began spouting out stories that Michelle had told him from the bar, and Kage finally found herself becoming part of the SGC.

"You don't need a ride do you?"

Kashoku turned towards the other end of the hallway to see Ellis in his civilian clothes headed her way. She smiled and shook her head. "No, I'm fine, but thank you for the offer."

Ellis raised a questioning eyebrow. "I saw Jackson leave about thirty minutes ago. Don't lie to me."

Kashoku opened her mouth to argue, but let her shoulders slump and her eyes fall to the floor. "I don't need a ride because I'm living here at the SGC again."

It was the difference between Ellis and Connors in the way he showed sympathy in his stance and expression. "Are you two…okay?"

Kashoku smiled honestly, hands clasped together behind her back. "We're fine, truly, we just…We're just better as friends right now."

"For what it's worth, I am sorry. I know it's rough when you really think things will work out," Ellis spoke, shoving his hands in his pockets. "But, you're a fun and cute girl. I wouldn't worry about it."

Kashoku chuckled, "That's real sweet of you. I really appreciate it." She barely managed to catch the flying object that was tossed her way. She blinked rapidly before zoning in on the item in her hand. It was a pair of keys. "What's this?"

"Go get changed, and then you're driving me home where Amy will have an awesome dinner waiting," he said casually.

"But-" Kashoku began to protest, staring at the keys with confusion.

Ellis spoke over her. "You have your license, don't you?"

"Well, yes, but-"

"Only way you are going to get comfortable is by doing it." He grinned mischievously. "Don't worry, I'm not going to let you crash my car."

Kashoku turned the keys over in her hand a few times, the jingle echoing in the empty hall, before nodding. "Okay! I'll be right back!"

"Yeah, don't take too long. She's got a warm pie waiting and I'm hungry!" Ellis called out.

Kashoku giggled as she waved back in his direction. It was probably the fastest change she had managed to do, almost forgetting her jacket for the cooler weather moving in. She loved Ellis's kids, and Amy did make the best food she had ever tasted. With Ellis's keys firmly in hand she made her way through security and out towards the parking lot where he was waiting for her.

"You ready?" Ellis asked as he secured his seat belt.

With a deep breath Kashoku put the keys in the ignition and started the car. "Let's go."


	4. Chapter 4

The waves just wouldn't stop coming. No matter how many advanced spells Kage seemed to throw at the Jaffa, more just took their place. The locals on Grilla had lost many of their soldiers quickly, and it was more or less just SG-11 holding down the fort. Exhaustion was going to self-destruct their team if Kage didn't do something about the situation fast. Black magic was simply not cutting it.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck," Kage cursed as she ducked behind another ledge and started tapping her head to think of her options. Dark Knight would probably do the trick, but it was risky for her. It would take her out and leave her completely defenseless if it didn't work. "Shit, only option right now." Pulling up the sleeve of her uniform she activated her garment grid and the sky went dark. Clad in black armor she sucked in a deep breath and stood from her place of hiding.

"Kage!" Connors called in her direction, questioning what she was about to do, still unfamiliar with the different spheres and their various uses.

"This is all I've got!" Kage called back. "If this doesn't work, get the hell out of here, and drag me back with you!" Connors gave a brief moment of hesitation, but then nodded firmly. Closing her eyes Kage let the darkness begin to swell inside of her. "My pain, is yours." She extended her hand towards the hoards of Jaffa and there was a dark boom of magic that engulfed the field in a black cloud.

The last thing she heard were screams filling the air before she felt herself fall.

"Sir, with all-due-respect-," Ellis started before he was cut off with a wave of Hammond's hand.

"Major, I don't want to hear it. The Tok'ra are our allies, and they have asked for our help," Hammond spoke plainly, not willing to tolerate anymore arguments.

"Didn't SG-1 just get finished saving their asses from the System Lords? I feel like there should be some sort of limit, especially since we don't see them helping us like, ever," Carr huffed in annoyance, arms crossed in defiance of the situation.

Hammond offered no answer to Carr's questions. "You leave in thirty minutes," he said before walking away.

"Fucking Tok'ra," Ellis murmured under his breath before also making his way out.

"I don't think I'll be as useful as they are hoping I will be," Rodd mused from his corner. "I don't really know much about their crystal system."

Wells placed an assuring hand on the kid's shoulder, "You'll figure it out."

It was with reluctance that the team geared up, drew weapons, and walked through the gate. The Tok'ra home world was still in shambles from the attack just a few weeks ago that SG-1 had helped stop. Kashoku knew that they typically preferred the isolation of the desert, but this world was shrouded in dense forest.

"Greetings," a male Tok'ra approached them, bowing slightly at Major Ellis. "My name is Hatnir. I was told you were bringing along one of your scientists who might be able to assist us. Which one of you is it?"

"Jeez, straight to the point are we?" Ellis scoffed before nodding in Rodd's direction.

Rodd lifted his hand halfway and stepped forward. "I'm not familiar with the crystal system, but I'll do what I can to help you."

Hatnir nodded, "Follow me."

"Yeah, we'll just stay here," Carr groaned, dripping with sarcasm. "This sure is fun in the sun."

"I'll go with him," Kashoku suggested. "Maybe I can think of something with one of my spheres to help?"

Ellis agreed, "Yeah, I want someone to watch Rodd's back anyway."

Kashoku nodded and took off to catch up with Rodd and Hatnir at the transportation rings to take them underground. "Don't you usually move worlds once the Goa'uld discover you? Why take the risk of staying here?"

"It is true, that we should relocate," Hatnir agreed, "But we have been having trouble with our crystals, and we already had started the tunneling process here on Revanna. The Goa'uld think we have evacuated this planet. If we can hurry and get all our people underground, we should be able to salvage this place."

Kashoku doubted that Anubis and the other System Lords would really fall for that ploy so easily.

"What is it with the crystals you are hoping we can accomplish?" Rodd asked, trying to figure out just what their mission was here on Revanna.

"The planet in which we obtain these crystals regularly is being watched. We cannot risk going there. However, we are running out of specific crystals, while we have many of others. We are hoping we can find some way to be able to transfer the crystalline properties of one to another," Hatnir explained.

Rodd gave Kashoku a concerned look. "That's above the laws of nature that I know of. The only way I know of changing a crystals properties is to apply an incredible amount of heat and pressure that I just can't do without time that exceeds my life span."

Kashoku frowned, thinking heavily as they walked before a light bulb went off in her head. "I have an idea! I don't know if it will work, but one of my dress spheres might be able to help on a temporary basis."

Hatnir turned his head slightly, curious. "Do explain."

"My Gun Mage sphere uses what we call blue magic. For a limited time I can copy the ability of a fiend on our planet to use against them. It's not quite the same, but maybe if you use one of these crystals I can try and copy the ability to help you until you can get more of the crystals you need," Kashoku explained.

Rodd's face lit up in interest. "Really? You think you can do that?"

Kashoku smiled at him, "Don't know, but it's worth a shot, neh? As with any magic, it has its price, but it will at least help the Tok'ra establish their base underground." As they reached the storage room with the stacks of crystals, Kashoku changed into the bright blue, pink, and yellow clothing of her Gun Mage sphere. "Ok, which crystal is it?"

Hatnir handed her a yellow hexagonal crystal and pointed towards a section of the wall. "Use it there."

Kashoku fiddled with the crystal in her hand, observing it closely, before readying herself to try and mimic the crystal's actions. She pressed it towards the wall and there was a flash of a bright light as the crystal began hollowing on the wall of the cave. She held onto it as long as she could before the crystal began to disintegrate leaving a long new hallway in its wake.

"Did it work?" Rodd asked curiously, stepping up next to her.

Kashoku's arm tingled with the familiar sensation of learning a new ability. "Something happened. I guess the only way to know for sure is to test it out."

Hatnir was anxious as he quickly paced down the hall to instruct Kashoku where to try the spell. "Here, if you can."

Kashoku took in a deep breath, biting at the inside of her lip. "Hope this works." Her gun appeared in her hand and she focused on the newfound blue magic inside of her since having touched the crystal. She pulled the trigger and a shot fired at the wall, instantly sparking into light and carving into the cave.

"You did it!" Rodd shouted in excitement, a small jump accompanying his words.

"It worked!" Kashoku beamed, whirling around to smile back at Rodd.

Tok'ra usually were void of showing any kind of emotion, but even Hatnir seemed to be pleased as he lifted his chest and a smile threatened to tug at his lips. "You have saved us."

The Spiran was on her way to asking where to begin next when the three were suddenly thrust off their feet, slamming into the ground as the tunnels shook violently around them. With a grunt Kashoku pushed herself to her feet, brushing off the rubble that had fallen around her. "What was that?"

"Goa'uld?" Rodd asked with worry as he looked up, dust speckled across his face from the debris.

"Hurry, to the surface," Hatnir commanded.

Not knowing what they would find themselves in the middle of, Kashoku cast Protect on all three of them before stepping into the rings for the surface. Thank Yevon she had. It was chaos all around her. Death Gliders were firing shots all around, voices were shouting out orders, and Kashoku could hear the familiar sound of the P-90s firing off in the distance. Wounded Tok'ra were already littering the battle field. Kashoku turned to Hatnir, face firm. "Have all wounded come underground. I can treat them out of harm's way."

"But the tunnels might collapse!" Hatnir argued.

"I can make new ones!" Kashoku reminded him, quickly changing spheres and readying herself for anything that came her way.

"SG-15, this is General Hammond. You have not called in for your 12-hour report. What is your status?" Rodd's radio crackled through the battle.

"Oh, you know, getting fucked over again by the Tok'ra, sir!" Ellis's voice rang loudly over heavy fire. "I don't want to say I told you so, sir, but I told you so!"

"Major, what is going on?!"

"Jaffa decided to come back and finish the job, sir. We are overrun. I don't know how much longer we can hold the fort before we run out of ammo! We need backup!"

"I don't have it, son. All our battle-ready teams are off world. Until one comes back, you are on your own."

Rodd and Kashoku exchanged worried glances. "I'm going to go help our team," He said, fear in his voice, but determination also.

Kashoku nodded. "Go." She turned and ran back towards the rings where several injured Tok'ra had already gathered or been dragged. She quickly began casting her spells, but realized just as swiftly that she alone would not be enough.

Kage feel like she had been hit with a blitzball repeatedly. When she had come to, she was in the same spot she remembered attacking the Jaffa. Ramirez had told her she had only passed out for a few minutes, but Kage was sure it had been days. Her attack had weakened the Jaffa force just enough for the rest of SG-11 to take swift action and eliminate the threat for good.

"That was some powerful voodoo magic shit you did back there, chica," Ramirez commented as she and Bentley helped hoist her to her feet.

Kage groaned as she tried to support herself, but found that she couldn't without great difficulty. "I like to avoid having to use that dress sphere, but it seemed like it was either that or get fucked, and I just wasn't feeling that today without dinner, first."

"You saved our asses, man, thanks," Bentley helped support her from the other side.

"Let's get back to base. Hopefully the locals can clean the mess up without our help and we can get back to Earth," Connors said as he swung his weapon over his shoulder and began taking off. There was blood seeping through his uniform around his shoulder, but he gave no indication of any real pain.

Rafe took up the rear as Kage hobbled along with the help of her teammates, her vision battling between clear and fuzzy the entire way. There were points she had momentary blackouts, gaps between places and time as they got back to the base and Connors spoke with the leaders. She hadn't even realized that they had made it to the gate until she felt the familiar lurching of her stomach through the wormhole and they landed on the ramp. Not wanting to show weakness, Kage shook off her helpers and stood straight in front of the soldiers who were pulling security in the embarkation room.

Hammond had wasted no time from descending the stairs from his place above to the gate room. His brow was creased in worry, and one of the nurses had followed in behind. "Team, I'm very sorry, but I need you to turn right back around and go on another mission. Captain Tyler here can cure any injuries you sustained before you go."

"Are you fucking kidding me?" Ramirez growled in disbelief, not even bothering with the proper addressing of her commander.

"Sir, we are wiped. There isn't anyone else that can go?" Rafe added, his shoulders slumping in exhaustion.

Connors kept the same blank face he always had. "What is the mission, sir?"

"It's SG-15. They were ambushed by Jaffa while assisting the Tok'ra on Revanna after the last attack. The Tok'ra forces were already heavily depleted, and they are being overrun," Hammond explained. "They requested back up over four hours ago and I have not been able to contact them, since."

Kage had a sudden burst of energy as she stood to her full height. "We're going."

"You've blacked out more than once since you cast that spell," Ramirez hissed angrily. "You are in no shape to go anywhere."

"I don't care," Kage snapped back, shaking off Ramirez angrily. "If Kashoku is in trouble, we're going." She walked down the ramp towards the nurse Hammond had brought along. "Cast a Pray spell and let's go."

"Sir, you've got to be joking," Bentley turned to Connors, a pleading look in his eyes.

Connors only shrugged. "General Hammond says we go, so we go. It's as simple as that."

There was a collective groan from Bentley, Ramirez, and Rafe, but they all lined up to get a boost of energy, albeit very small in the grand scheme of things, before turning on their heels and waiting for the gate to start dialing once more. Kage knew that the use of any sort of magic would be limited, but she could still use a sword and gun just as well, especially if Kashoku was in danger.

The chaos they ended up walking in to was far worse than what they had been at for hours on Grilla. There were explosions everywhere and the team scattered to find cover. From her crouched position behind some fallen trees she saw Connors link up with Ellis. Knowing that that particular situation was handled, she began scanning the horizon for any sight of Kashoku. With no immediate luck she stayed low and began moving to the first Tok'ra she could find.

"Where's Kashoku?" She shouted over the battle fire.

"Below, with the wounded," he spoke as he stood and fired his zat'ni'katel at the Jaffa.

"Take me to her." She commanded, instinctively ducking as a death glider's fire landed near them.

He seemed to hesitate, not wanting to leave his position, but nodded and motioned for her to follow. They both dodged bullets and staff blasts as they made it towards the transportation rings. Both came out unscathed as the yellow light engulfed them and took them underground.

There was blood everywhere.

Kage stepped over bodies and looked around hastily before finding Kashoku kneeling next to one of the bodies in a separate room, the soft glow of her magic at work. Her skin was almost as pale as the robes she wore. "Kash!"

Kashoku's head snapped up, and her eyes closed slowly in relief. "Yokatta. Kage, what's going on up there? I keep getting more and more wounded with no sign of this stopping. I've had some Tok'ra come to me more than once. I can't do it anymore."

"It's fucking hell fire up there," Kage answered, the scent of copper hitting her hard. "Your team was ok from what I saw for a second, but Kash, we aren't going to be much help. We just got back from our own war, and I had to use Dark Knight." Kashoku instantly understood the severity of the situation, knowing she had to go that far. "We need to evacuate. The gate was clear – mostly – when we came through."

Kashoku nodded. "We should start gathering people to move."

"MOVE! GET OUT OF THE WAY, NOW!" Ellis's voice boomed from down the hall.

Her entire time was suddenly in the room. Wells was clinging to Ellis, hand clutching at a bleeding wound at his shoulder. Rodd was limp over Carr's shoulder, blood seeping through his uniform around his abdomen. They were both set down next to several other wounded Tok'ra before Ellis and Carr took off again, shouting orders. Kashoku gasped, quickly crawling over to Wells.

"Heal Rodd first," Wells hissed through the pain as he managed to prop himself up against the wall of the tunnel.

Kashoku hesitated but nodded, turning herself so that she could get her hands on the unconscious lieutenant. A lump formed in her throat at the damage. Wells and Rodd would be the limits of her magic.

"Don't worry about me," Wells breathed through sharp gasps. "I'll be fine until we can make it back."

"No," she snapped firmly, "I'll heal you both."

"Are you crazy?" Kage argued, irritated at her friend's stubbornness. "He said he's fine, save your energy for those that need it!" She had experienced several similar injures on hunts before, and although it would suck royally, she knew Wells would at least live.

"I said I'd heal you both!" Kashoku shouted decisively, eyes locking with Wells across Rodd's body.

Wells stared back at her, his heavy panting the only sound in the room beyond distant explosions for several moments. "Kash…"

"Let me work," she said plainly before concentrating once more on calling her magic to her to heal the wound on Rodd's abdomen. She could feel the last of her energy drain through her fingers as the wound closed and Rodd's eyes fluttered open slowly. She smiled as his brown eyes stared up at her. "You ok?"

He pushed himself up onto his elbows and stared at her in shock and utter fear. "I'm so sorry. I didn't-,"

"Shh," she hushed him, far too tired to offer her usual kind words to him in attempts to calm him down. She lazily turned back to Wells and reached out a hand for his shoulder.

He grabbed it, keeping her from reaching the wound as he held her gaze. "Kash, don't. You're too weak."

Kashoku clenched her jaw, offering him a silent apology as she squeezed his hand and let her magic flow through his arm to the injury on his shoulder. Her body suddenly felt weightless, and she could do nothing but let herself fall against Wells's chest.

Kage growled angrily as she knelt down to check that Kashoku was still breathing. Her brown eyes were still slightly open, but she knew that if she cast even the slightest of spells she would be done for. "Baka. Why don't you ever listen?" With a heavy sigh she looked up at Wells, who was holding onto Kashoku tightly, eyes cast down. Kage could feel her heart stop, curiosity swelling up within her at the intimate moment shared between the two.

"She ok?" Ellis questioned as he popped his head back in.

Kage nodded, finally prying her eyes away from the pair. "She'll be fine, but we've got to get out of here. This place is done for. It's not worth trying to protect it."

"No shit," Ellis agreed. "I think the Tok'ra finally understand that. We're getting out of here, now. We're going to another planet where they've set up a temporary base."

Kage helped Rodd to his feet and eyed Wells once more as he scooped Kashoku into his arms, guilt filling both gentlemen's faces. Rodd looked like he might keel over from the thought of it alone. "Let's go." She pushed past the bodies in the tunnel towards the front so that she could lead the initiative towards the Gate. Many of the ground forces had been eliminated between SG-15 and SG-11, but the Death Gliders were viscous in their attacks from above. Kage didn't have enough in her to protect the remaining Tok'ra from the attack, so she focused on the Jaffa still standing. Mercifully, the Tok'ra moved with a sense of urgency and they were able to get the survivors through the Gate quickly.

Ellis turned back, quickly searching for any stragglers that may have been left behind. Satisfied that everyone had made it through he nodded to Kage, "Alright let's go."

Kage didn't hesitate as she turned and ran through the event horizon. The sun was bright on the other side, the planet much more like the typical terrain of a Tok'ra home world. It was quiet as the event horizon dissipated behind her and Ellis and the wounded were gathered to take to the tunnels below the surface. Kashoku had regained consciousness and was standing at Wells's side, but grasping onto his arm firmly for support, his body almost fully sustaining her own.

Connors approached Ellis with slumped shoulders. Even he was finally showing signs of heavy fatigue. "I spoke with the local leader. They can handle things from here. It's time to get our people back."

"You don't have to tell me twice," Ellis agreed. "Rodd! Dial us home!"

"Sir!" Rodd responded before jogging to the DHD and swiftly pressing the correct combination into the panel.

Kage had never been so happy to see Earth.

"You still alive over there, bonita?" Ramirez asked from behind the curtain.

Kashoku let out a groan from her place on the bottom of shower. Her knees were curled into her chest as she let the hot water flow over her skin. She didn't even have the energy to stand anymore, even though she would have probably fallen asleep if Ramirez hadn't called out to her. "I'm coming…" With a deep sigh she slowly pushed herself to her feet and turned off the water. Reaching a hand out from behind the curtain she felt around for her towel and began lazily drying herself off. Wrapping it around her lithe frame she stepped out and padded over to her locker on light feet. Ramirez and Kage were slowly getting dressed around her.

"You look about how I feel, bonita," Ramirez hummed tiredly as she shoved her shirt down over her head.

Kashoku gave a weak smile. "I'm surprised you don't look it, too."

"It's a gift," she responded in equal jest.

"Quicker you get dressed the quicker you can get to a bed," Kage pointed out as she shoved her feet into her boots.

Kashoku nodded and reached for her bra and undies out of the locker and began dressing herself. She was in the process of slipping on her pants when the klaxons went off in a blaze of thunder and a voice came over the intercom.

"Attention all personnel. The SGC is on lockdown due to a possible biohazard threat. I repeat; the SGC is on lockdown due to a possible biohazard threat. Do not leave your current location until further notice."

Kashoku let out a loud sob as she slumped to the bench and buried her face in her hands. "You've got to be joking!"

Ramirez frowned. "Biohazard? What the fuck have those fucking scientist been up to, huh?" She let out a string of curses in Spanish, plopping down angrily next to the half-dressed Kashoku.

Kage let out an explosive kick at one of the lockers with her boot, the exhaustion coming out in pure anger. "This is bullshit!"

Unable to fight unconsciousness any longer, Kashoku grabbed the towel she had used and bundled it up on the far side of the bench before laying down, using it as a pillow. "I have to sleep…" She just couldn't keep her eyes open any longer.

She could hear Kage's sigh. "Yeah, right behind you."

"Kashoku! Kash! Please wake up!"

Kashoku felt her body jolt awake with a hard shake of her shoulder. She shot up from the bench to see Sam standing over her, tears threatening to spill from her eyes. "Sam? What is it? Is the threat gone?"

"It's Daniel. You've got to hurry," She spoke quickly.

Kage and Ramirez shot Kashoku a look, but the Spiran wasted no time reaching in for her garment grid and quickly changed into her robes. She was still exhausted, but the sudden rush of adrenaline had her ready to do anything that was needed. Without a word to the other two women she was out the door with Sam at her heels. "What happened?!"

"Radiation poisoning," Sam began, fists clenched at her side. "There was an armed bomb that was going to take out the entire planet. He disabled it, but with extreme levels of radiation exposure."

Kashoku frowned, worriedly as they entered the elevator. Her mind was racing, trying to process everything her friend was telling her. "I-I don't know what that means."

"It's…It attacks the body on a cellular level. The radiation will destroy the cells and tissue of his body from the inside out. He received a lethal dose. There is nothing on Earth that can fix this," She explained, swallowing hard to try and keep her composure.

Kashoku felt her body grow cold at the explanation, eyes casting down on the floor. "So it's…internal." Sam gave a brief nod. Kashoku couldn't say the words aloud to herself. It would make them too real if spoke them, but she didn't think she could heal this. They entered the infirmary, Daniel sitting on a medical bed in white scrubs with O'Neill at his side.

"…will be followed be tremors, convulsions and something called ataxia. Surface tissue, brain tissue and internal organs will inflame and degrade, I believe that's called necrosis. Now based on the dose of radiation I got, all that will happen in the next ten to fifteen hours, and if I don't drown in my own fluids first, I will bleed to death, and there is no medical treatment to prevent that," Daniel spoke frankly.

O'Neill shoved his hands in his pockets defiantly. "Maybe not that we know of." He looked towards Kashoku, "but maybe her."

Kashoku could feel a sob catch in her throat as Daniel's blue eyes stared up at her. She forced a smile out, trying not to show her concern. "What trouble have you gotten into now, neh?" She tried to laugh, but she had to cover her mouth to keep from breaking down completely. She went to take a step forward, but Daniel held up a hand.

"Don't get too close…I could still be radiating something," he warned softly.

Kashoku clenched her fists, but nodded. "It's going to be ok. I can fix this." Daniel smiled at her, but she could tell he didn't believe it. "Janet, have you already tried healing him?"

Janet gave a sad nod, "I did, but it's hard to say at this point if it worked. It healed the burn on his hand, but it might not have taken care of the internal damage. We won't really know for a few more hours when the symptoms would start kicking in. We just thought…," she hesitated, "I'm not as strong as you. We just wanted to take every precaution."

Kashoku shook her head in understanding. It probably wouldn't make a difference.

"Kashoku, don't," Daniel spoke as she closed her eyes to start casting a spell. She stopped instantly, eyes flying open. "Look at you. You don't have the energy to perform magic right now. I'm not going to let you kill yourself for me."

"I'm fine," She lied, standing up tall to try and be convincing.

He gave her another smile. "I know you better than that, Kash. Save your energy, at least until we can see if Janet's spell worked."

Janet put a comforting hand on Kashoku's shoulder. "He's right. If it didn't work, then we're going to need you at your full strength."

"And what if he doesn't have that kind of time?!" She argued, every ounce of her wanting to try and cast a spell despite their protests.

"Then, I don't," Daniel sighed heavily, seemingly having already accepted his fate. "I told you, that I'm not going to let you throw away your life when we don't even know if white magic will work on this."

Kashoku's lip began to tremble and she squeezed her eyes shut, a tear finally escaping. "Why do you get to make that decision!?"

"Kash, please don't argue with me on this. Let's just wait."

They waited, and it got bad. Quickly. The burns resurfaced on his hands and they swiftly began spreading. When Daniel began to vomit, Kashoku couldn't take it any more.

"I'm not waiting any longer!" Kashoku shouted at his continued protests.

"You haven't had any rest at all. What good is anything going to do at this point?!" Daniel questioned, tiredness showing in his own face.

"Maybe everything!" She cried, unable to hold back any longer. She forced the magic within her to begin generating, but no matter how much she grasped she couldn't pull enough for the strongest spell she had. Shaking, she gathered what she could and focused everything onto Daniel. He was cast in a bright blue and yellow light before it shimmered away.

It hadn't healed anything.

Kashoku was still for several moments, her body feeling completely numb. When he looked at her she let out the sob she had been holding in and buried her face in her hands. "Please don't go!"

"Kash," he whispered softly, his hand coming up to reach out for her, but stopping just short of her arm knowing he couldn't touch her.

"I'm so sorry," She cried. Kashoku couldn't even bare to look at him, her eyes cast on the ground. She couldn't be here. She had to run. Pushing past the nurses she made for the door and felt herself go into a daze as she brushed past personnel in the hallway, everything around her a blur as she headed for her room. As soon as the door slammed behind her she fell to the ground and cried the hardest she had ever felt herself cry.

"Kash?" There was a heavy pounding on her door.

"Kash? This isn't funny, I'm coming in." Wells opened the door and cursed when he saw Kashoku setting against the far wall unmoving. Kashoku couldn't make herself look at him as he knelt down beside her. "Kash? What's wrong? Are you ok?"

He shook her, and she finally snapped out of her daze, her eyes red and puffy with dried tears as she slowly looked at him. "I…I can't save him."

Wells frowned at her. "What do you mean? Save who?"

"They didn't tell you?" She asked, surprised that even despite their dislike for Daniel, Kage and Ramirez had failed to tell her teammates anything.

Wells licked his lips, "Kage said Major Carter had come for you, saying something about Daniel being the cause of the biohazard lockdown. I mean, you took care of it, didn't you?"

Kashoku felt her body begin to shake again as she clenched at a chunk of her own hair. "He's dying."

Wells stayed there, crouched at her side, unmoving and unknowing on what to say. "You…can't heal him?" Kashoku shook her head, her lip beginning to tremble and the tears falling again. He moved so that he was sitting next to her and took her into his arms, her hands grasping at him as she buried her face into his chest. They sat there like that in the dark. Neither knew how much time had passed before Kashoku felt like there was nothing left in her.

"I should go say goodbye," she whispered against Wells.

Wells nodded slowly, hand stroking gently down her back before letting it fall next to him. "You know where to find me if you need anything, ok?"

Kashoku nodded, separating herself from him, and finding the courage to stand. She opened the door just enough to let the light in before peering at him over her shoulder with thanks. He smiled back encouragingly and she opened the door fully, each step feeling closer to the edge. Janet didn't look much better than she did as she passed by, the doctor offering her a silently sorrowful apology as she walked past and took a seat next to Daniel. He had gotten worse. Almost his entire body was covered in the bandages. Swallowing hard she asked, "Do you think…do you think we could have tried harder?"

Daniel's eyes were closed, but let out a weak huff. "Of course we could have…but do you really think it would have changed anything?"

"You don't?" She questioned.

Sucking in a breath Daniel gradually turned his head and cracked open his eyes to look at her. "No. I told you, Kash…what happened was meant to happen."

Kashoku clenched at her robes in her lap. "And you think this is meant to happen, too?"

"Yes," he answered truthfully. "I saved an entire planet from destruction. My death isn't in vain."

She let out a sad laugh. "So that makes it ok, does it? I didn't believe that when all the summoners spout that about Sin and their Pilgrimage, and I don't believe it now. "

"Promise me you won't beat yourself up about this," he demanded. "This isn't your fault, and I would never be able to forgive myself if you continue to try and blame yourself for this." She looked away, unable to give him an answer. He gave a sigh of frustration, but did not push the issue further. "You don't look like you've gotten any sleep."

"I haven't," she answered honestly. "I'm so tired, Daniel, but I couldn't sleep knowing-," she stopped herself, biting at her lip to keep herself from crying again. "I can sleep later."

"Staying awake won't fix anything."

"So, what? You just want me to say goodbye and then walk away to let you die?" She asked angrily, insulted that he would even suggest it.

"I don't want you to see me go, Kash. It's going to get really painful, really quick and I-," he winced in pain, closing his eyes again.

"I'm not leaving," she said as she positioned the chair so that she could prop herself up comfortably against the side of the bed.

They sat there in silence for a long time, and Kashoku thought that Daniel had gone back to sleep before he asked, "Could you sing for me?"

Kashoku was surprised at his request, but smiled. "Of course I can. Kyou ga totemo tanoshii to, asu mo kitto tanoshikute. Sonna hibi ga tsudzuite'ku, sou omotte ita ano koro."

Today was fun,  
and tomorrow will surely be fun as well.  
"These days will continue forever,"  
or so I thought at the time.

Kashoku's world was dark. The only thing she could make out around her was the steady beeping in her ears. With a moan she felt herself slowing coming to, the comforts of the bed she was in finally settling in as she opened her eyes. She was still in the infirmary, but she was the one hooked up to the machine she had been hearing instead of Daniel. "Janet?"

Janet was instantly by her side, a warm smile on her face. "Hey, there. Welcome back. How do you feel?"

"Tired…," she closed her eyes, trying to remember. "What happened?"

"You fell asleep, but it wasn't restful. I started worrying, with how much you had exerted during the missions, so I induced you with a medication that would put you into a deep sleep," she explained.

Kashoku frowned and then her eyes went wide. "Daniel!" Her head snapped towards the bed he had been in when she was singing to him.

It was empty.

Kashoku didn't need to hear Janet's apologies to know what had happened. Slowly she felt herself sink back into the bed as the sobs came once more.

Janet reached for something next to her, and her world went black once more.


	5. Chapter 5

"Kash? You ok?"

Kashoku woke with a start, her head pounding with a headache that hadn't gone away for days. She looked around, dazed and confused, not knowing how she had gotten from the infirmary to here. Where was-oh. Burying her face in her hands she let out a shuddered sigh. "I don't know why I came here."

She felt Ellis slide into the chair next to her at the island counter top. "Because it probably all feels like a bad dream, and you were hoping you'd come in here and everything would be normal."

Kashoku slid her hands back so that she could see her commander. "But that's just it. It is completely normal. Everything is exactly how he left it… He's just not here."

"It's ok to grieve, you know, but I'm not going to let you blame yourself," he told her plainly. "I've lost soldiers before, and it doesn't help. Finding someone to blame doesn't make it go away."

The Spiran rubbed at her eyes, void of tears but red and raw from tiredness. The nurse had told her she had slept for two days before she fled the infirmary, but she didn't feel any more rested than she had before returning from the mission. "I know there was nothing I could have done, even if I had been at full strength, but I'm not used to this. I've never not been able to heal someone."

"Just goes to show that not even magic is the answer for everything," he mused. Sucking in a breath he placed a gentle hand on her shoulder. "I want you to come stay with me, tonight. I don't want you here by yourself. You're still recovering, and I don't think you can get a restful sleep here at the SGC."

Kashoku didn't bother arguing, and offered up a nod as her answer. "When's our next mission?"

Ellis pursed his lip, irritated by the inquiry. "Thursday…I tried to convince General Hammond to give us some leave, but I was shot down quicker than I could ask the question. SG-1 has priority and we're too many teams down right now to afford putting us out of commission for more than the time needed for you to get back on your feet magic wise."

She nodded, understanding. "SG-1 should have priority. He was their team member, after all."

Ellis hummed neither approval nor disapproval at the comment. "Put together an overnight bag. There's nothing else to be done today, so let's just go on home. Amy already knows you are coming, and it'll be a great surprise for the kids."

Kashoku smiled slightly before willing herself to get out of the chair. She strummed her fingers against the countertop, mind still trying to gather and process everything that had happened the past week. "I…I came to a few times while in the infirmary. It was never for very long, but every time Brandon was there."

Ellis scoffed. "Tch. He never left. I had to kick him out, sent him home to take care of Justice. Coincidentally, that's when you decided to wake up and sneak out on us," he accused in jest. "It was like you knew he had left."

Kashoku looked to the ground, ashamed. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to-,"

"Stop," he insisted. "Don't be sorry for anything. It's ok. Go get changed, and we'll go, ok?"

Kashoku hated walking through the halls of the SGC. Every time she thought she might for a moment push Daniel to the back of her mind she would receive another look of pity. She changed quickly and kept her eyes down as she walked through the hallway, doing everything she could to avoid the gazes of any personnel that passed by. Ellis made small talk during their drive, happily chatting about his kids' recent achievements in school and some of Amy's new recipes. Kashoku was thankful that he didn't try and ask how she was doing.

Amy showed no signs of knowing the circumstances around Kashoku's appearance, offering only welcoming hugs and smiles as she ushered the Spiran into the house. Jessie and Cody waived to her from their spots on the couch as Ellis took her bag and walked towards the back of the hall with it.

"Momma said you're staying with us a few days," Jessie grinned excitedly.

"You're going to play with us lots, right?" Cody asked, climbing over the top of the couch to better see her.

"Stop badgering her," Amy insisted with a light smack to her son's arm as she passed by. "You'll leave her alone while she's here."

Seeing the children's' forlorn faces Kashoku assured them, "Of course we'll play, just not as much as you'd probably like. I've been really tired lately."

"Come on." Amy placed her hands on Kashoku's shoulders and led her towards the kitchen. "I could use some help finishing dinner and I've got this bottle of fantastic wine that needs some tasting."

Kashoku watched eagerly as Amy pulled out two wine glasses and made quick work of the cork. Nothing sounded better than a drink right now. She took the proffered glass gratefully and let her shoulders relax as she took a sip. "Thank you."

Amy took a sip of her own and ran her finger around the rim of the glass thoughtfully. "He couldn't tell me much. Not that he ever can," she let out a slightly annoyed huff as she took another sip. "But just know that you are always welcome here for as long as you need. I don't want you to ever feel like you are a disposition on our family."

Kashoku responded with a small but appreciative smile. "It really amazes me how little you know me, but you are willing to allow me into your home like this."

She gave an amused huff as she set down her glass and slipped an oven mitt on. "I've been informed you've saved my husband's life on more than one occasion. That's all I need to know." She pulled out a steaming casserole and placed it on top of the stove. "Grab the salad from the fridge and put it on the table, would you?"

Kashoku nodded and did as she was asked, the children scurrying into the kitchen to wash their hands knowing that it was almost time to eat. Ellis passed her by and grabbed a beer from the fridge before everyone joined in the dining room and took their seats. "This looks amazing as always," she beamed as the aroma filled the air.

"I've got peach cobbler and homemade vanilla ice cream for dessert," Amy added, unfolding her napkin and laying it down on her lap.

The rest of the night passed quickly, an air of ease to the evening that Kashoku threw herself into gratefully. Yet despite what Amy and Ellis both said, she still felt like an intruder in their home as she climbed into bed, stretching out and feeling what were definitely very expensive pillows. Amy even had a full breakfast prepared for everyone before Jessie and Cody headed off to school and she and Ellis had to head back into the SGC. They had a morning brief on a mission that was three days out, but Kashoku couldn't remember where they'd be going or even why by the time they made it back to their office.

"Are you even listening to me?" Kage huffed in annoyance.

"Huh?" Kashoku asked with a slight shake of her head, having been staring off into space once again. She focused on her friend, confused. When had Kage shown up?

Kage rolled her eyes, oblivious or willing to forgive Kashoku's distraction. "I said, Connors agreed to let us have team bonding at the bar tonight. You're going to come, right?"

Kashoku gave a small shrug. "I don't know. I don't really think I want to be around everyone right now."

There was an agitated huff as Kage switched to Spiran despite Carr and Wells both having loud music blaring from headphones and Rodd too engulfed in his current project to care about eavesdropping. "Look. I'm sorry Daniel died."

"Are you?" Kashoku asked accusingly, squaring her shoulders.

"Yes. No." She crossed her arms and looked away. "I'm sorry that he died because it has upset you."

Well, at least that was honest. "You're really good at this, you know," she responded sarcastically.

"Tch." Kage countered, "I'm the most sympathetic person there is."

Kashoku shook her head and sighed, turning her attention away from her friend. Suddenly she didn't want to talk about the issue anymore, especially not with Kage, who well-meaning or not was only tearing into healing wounds. "Maybe," she demurred.

Kage must have already used up her limited empathy, because her expression shifted to irritation as she stood up. "Kashoku, he's dead. He's not coming back and there was nothing you could have done. Stop drowning in your self-pity and get back out there. You're going to jeopardize one of your own teammates if you keep acting like this."

Kashoku's gaze snapped back to Kage. The haze that had clouded her mind all morning boiled red, and she felt her cheeks and ears warming in fury at Kage's accusations. "Just go," Kashoku hissed, unable to deal with Kage's bluntness any longer. What she was saying was right, but the delivery left much to be desired, and she was done.

Kage left and aimed for the gym. With luck, someone she knew would be there to help ease all the built up tension she had somehow managed to not let loose on Kashoku. She'd known the other woman would be upset, but what was with the lost little girl look? She'd asked around and she knew Kashoku had a mission in a few days. If she didn't snap out of it, Jackson wouldn't be the only casualty that week. Yet did Kashoku seem to care? No, she just wanted to carry on with her pity party.

To the punching bag's good fortune, Rafe was already there, lifting weights when she stormed. She didn't have to say a word, her team member chuckling and offering a spar the moment he saw her face. The good-natured man kissed the mat twice before he coaxed the story out of her, and then just hummed quietly.

"I don't fucking get it," she growled as she grabbed Rafe's quickly approaching fist and went to twist it around her.

"You don't think you're being even a little bit insensitive?" he asked, pulling free from her counter attack. He stepped back to the corner of the mat to collect himself, keeping a steady eye on her.

"No," she responded flatly, flipping her ponytail over her shoulder and raising her fists once more.

He laughed as she charged at him, making a half-hearted attempt to meet her, but his mirth quickly found him on his back. Kage sat straddling his hips, her knuckles centimeters from his face, and her expression as sour as a wet cat's. He grinned. "You're being an asshole."

Kage shoved him into the mat in protest before maneuvering herself off of him and grabbing her towel from the bench to wipe herself off. "What else is new?"

Rafe gave another snicker as he propped himself up on an elbow, still lying on the mat. "Ain't nothin' changing about that any time soon, I figure. Do you think Kash is going to want to go back to Spira now?"

Kage froze, towel half-way down her face. The thought hadn't even once crossed her mind. It had been the whole reason she had come here, to get Kashoku to come home. But she had lost sight of that, growing kind of comfortable with the daily SGC routine and the excitement of going off world. If she had to be honest with herself, she had more friends here than she had ever had back on Spira. It seemed weird to acknowledge it, but she didn't want them to return home anymore. "I… don't know. She hasn't really said." She finished wiping her face and set the towel down, exchanging it for her water bottle. "But…I don't think she'll go. Leaving Spira was never really about Daniel."

"So he was a means to an end, huh?" Rafe finally rocked himself up and pushed himself to his feet, joining her in wiping himself down and hydrating. "You saying she never intended on being in a relationship with him? I never really got that impression, but I didn't know much about them. They seemed happy until a few months back."

"No," she shook her head. "I think she had every intention of trying, but I also think Kashy likes the idea of things a lot better than she actually likes them," Kage explained. "Plus, I think the SGC offered a distraction… wandering eyes and all that."

Rafe raised a curious eyebrow. "You think she's had the hots for someone else? Who?"

Kage laughed. "Ha! Like I'd tell you, you gossip. Don't think I don't know how you manage extra dessert from the commissary."

"Hey, I'm just making sure my military given recon skills stay sharp, no fault in that. If I get paid in cinnamon buns and brownies, that's no one's business but my own," he defended.

"Yeah, yeah, whatever you say. Just make sure you don't eat too many or you'll have to spend even more time in the gym than you already do," Kage smiled. "Besides, I'm not entirely sure. It's just a suspicion...with a lot of evidence."

"Well, damn. Get some, girl," he grinned. "My well-tuned recon skills" – Kage snorted – "say she could easily have anyone on their hands and knees."

"Ew. Mental image," Kage replied only half-jokingly.

Rafe slapped a hand on her shoulder with a broad grin. "Cheer up, girl. Drinks are on their way after our afternoon mission brief. And a few days after that, you get to kill people again."

"Thank fuck," she groaned, pleased that she could satisfy her urges again soon.

"Chow after we shower?" Rafe asked as he gathered up his gear.

Kage nodded, her stomach growling in response. "Yeah, sure."

"Can you drop me off downtown? I had some errands to run and then they are finally giving the beast a longer leash and letting Kage go to McCabe's tonight," Kashoku spoke in jest as she buckled her seat-belt.

Ellis gave a grunt. "That should be interesting. Yeah, no problem. Do I need to come get you tonight?"

Kashoku shook her head. "No, I don't want to wake up Jessie and Cody so late. Michelle said I could stay with her and Robbie anytime, so I'll probably just go home with them."

Ellis shrugged as he put the car in reverse. "Ok, but know you can call if you need to. It's not a problem. They sleep through anything."

Kashoku nodded in thanks, but she really had no intentions of attending McCabe's. At least, probably not. She still didn't feel like being around anyone she knew, and everyone from the SGC went to McCabe's. Her errands turned out to be mindless window shopping and a pedicure she had hoped would relax her somewhat, but she felt no better as she walked out of the salon. The sun was just beginning to set as she passed by a small pub. There weren't many people yet, and her stomach growled at the sight of food in front of a customer.

Changing course, she opened the door and made towards a seat at the barely populated bar. The bartender was prompt, which got him a smile, but also savvy enough to not try chatting with her once he'd gotten her drink and handed her a menu, which she appreciated more than anything. Desiring more of that, she skimmed the menu and quickly picked out a burger, handing the menu back and busying herself with her drink as the bartender entered it in and settled nearby to watch the television over the bar. She hardly noticed the man that sat a few stools down until he spoke to her.

"Come here often?"

Kashoku looked up and was shocked to see none other than Colonel O'Neill. He was dressed casually, a cap on his head and a beer in his hands, and his eyes stayed focused on the sporting event the bartender was watching. She gave a small smile and looked down. "No."

"Yeah," he took a swig of his beer, "me either."

The bartender gave a snort and Kashoku smiled then. Clearly, he must have been a regular. "Does it bother you that I'm here?"

"Why would it?" he asked, glancing over at her.

She gave a shrug, thinking about the months passed. "We haven't exactly had the best relationship since meeting."

He fingered the rim of the bottle thoughtfully before countering her response. "True, but I think the same thing brought us both here tonight."

Kashoku could feel the grief wash over her again for Daniel. Gripping her glass tightly she took a large swig of the alcoholic substance. "I'm so sorry. It's my fault he's gone."

"It's not," O'Neill said firmly. "I don't know why you think that."

"I couldn't save him," she responded, trying hard not to let the tears form up again. Over the past few days she had gotten so much better about pushing Daniel to the back of her brain, but it was still so painful to talk about. It must've been hard to hear too, she thought, distantly noting as the bartender quietly crossed to the far side of the bar, a kind illusion of privacy.

O'Neill frowned before setting his beer down and sitting up straight, looking straight at her. "So nobody told you?"

Kashoku's head snapped towards him, eyes staring him down accusingly. "Told me what?"

O'Neill shifted, clearly wondering if he should have even brought it up. With a deep sigh and a rub of his forehead he began speaking softly, aware of wandering ears. "Jacob came with a Tok'ra healing device. It was working."

Kashoku could feel a tight knot forming in her throat, her hands clenching at the edge of the bar top. Cautiously she prodded, "But?"

"He wanted to go," O'Neill answered sadly, picking up his beer again.

He wanted to go, her brain echoed. The words felt so hollow and try as she might she just couldn't understand. "Why?!" she asked, a sob choking out of her on the tail end, try as she did to hold it in.

O'Neill heaved a sigh. "I've never pretended to understand anything Daniel does, but all I know is that it's what he wanted. You shouldn't live with the guilt of his death."

Kashoku put a hand to her mouth, trying hard to take in what O'Neill had just told her. Her head was spinning, trying to understand why Daniel would have given up when there had been a means to save him. Squeezing her eyes shut to keep in the tears she motioned towards the bartender. "I need a shot, please."

"Make that two, on me," O'Neill added. The bartender nodded and pulled out a bottle of whiskey and two shot glasses, placing one in front of each of them. They both downed their portions and continued on their respective drinks. "For what it's worth... Even though I thought the two of you together caused some issues, I'm sorry."

Kashoku gave a sad laugh as she wiped her mouth with the back of her hand. "What, nobody told you? We broke up a few weeks before he died."

O'Neill paused, not really knowing how to respond to the given information. "I sort of suspected things weren't going well between you two. He didn't talk about it, but having been through a divorce I kind of pick up on those things."

"I didn't know you were married." Kashoku was surprised that O'Neill had even decided to open up about his personal life around her.

"Yeah, well, my marriage wasn't the only thing I lost," he said softly as he finished his beer and motioned for another. "Sorry things didn't work out. Were you two at least ok?"

Kashoku nodded, the bartender replacing her empty glass with a new one as well. "It was mutual. I guess…"

"You guess?" he prodded, his cheeks tingling red with the buzz they both were getting.

"I don't think I really wanted to let it go, even though I knew it wasn't working out," she admitted, thinking back to the final days of her relationship with Daniel. "I tried desperately to hold on to what remained, but all that was left were threads." She took another large gulp of her drink. "I mean, I came all this way to be with him and it ended like this. I gave up everything."

O'Neill rubbed at his face, trying to get some feeling back into his cheeks. "Do you regret it at all?"

"I try not to regret things," she answered. "At that moment, when I made the decision, it's exactly what I wanted at the time. I shouldn't regret that."

"Are you going to go back home now that it's over?" It was an honest question, with no hope of an answer that swayed one way or the other.

Kashoku licked her lips, thinking about the question for a moment before answering. "I miss it. I miss the familiarity of it, but I like it here. I learn something new every day, and I love my team. I don't think I could go." Swirling the pink liquid around in her glass she changed the course of the subject. "Have you found a replacement for your team?"

O'Neill gave a frustrated huff. "Scientists. Useless. All of them. I've been going through the case files, and I just can't see any of them on the team."

Kashoku hummed thoughtfully, "They can't all be useless. Daniel wasn't."

A noncommittal hum was his response. "You know…Jonas got wind of you and Daniel being together. He keeps trying to get the courage to tell you he's sorry." Conspiratorially, he revealed, "He feels like it's his fault too."

"Ah. That explains why I keep seeing him all the time. We should start a club," she laughed. "We'd make quite the group."

O'Neill snorted. "Yeah," he said as he sat up and emptied his bottle, "I think I should call it quits. Carter is coming to be responsible and take me home. You need a ride?"

Kashoku shook her head. "No. Kage is having her first night out down the street. I can catch a ride with someone there. Besides, I have food coming." The bartender at some point had slipped into the back and by now she knew that meant her burger would be out soon.

"Geez, I better hurry and get out of here before the cops start showing up everywhere. I don't think it's a good idea to let her out in public," he said as he pulled out his wallet and left a generous amount of money on the bar top.

Kashoku giggled. "You're not the only one, but since even Colonel Connors has to still be present, I imagine things won't get that far."

"Don't let him fool you. He's wild. Crazy. He'll be naked downing shots before you know it," he joked, almost managing a straight face.

"I hope not!" Kashoku laughed before standing to see him off. "Thanks…for listening."

"Yeah, well, you weren't the only one who needed an ear, I guess," he said.

Kashoku smiled softly, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. "Have a good night, Colonel. I'll see you around."

It was odd. The mission they had been briefed for was definitely not a combat mission, and Kage had sat through the whole thing wondering why she was being included at all. Sure, they'd have to be extremely sneaky for mission success, but if all went well there'd be no enemy contact. …Of course, things never seemed to go quite to plan, so maybe that's why she was going to be brought along.

"Maybe he's finally starting to trust you a bit more," Ramirez offered up as she changed out of her uniform in the locker room, Kage having just shrugged out of her jacket to leave her tank top and military pants.

Kage raised an eyebrow skeptically. "Yeah. I don't think that's it."

"Well, you haven't killed anyone here yet or gotten in any fights lately, so he has to have let out some sigh of relief," she joked as she shoved her feet into her boots.

"More like he's waiting for the storm," Kage snorted.

"Nah, chica, we save that shit for the Jaffa now," Ramirez grinned viciously where she was bending over her boots, her dark mane free from her typical bun and hanging around her face. Kage had been turning to grin back at her, but paused, eyes trailing down the long tresses she'd never seen free before. Ramirez kept talking as though she hadn't noticed anything. "Now, let's go see what I have that will fit you. You better not puke on my clothes."

Kage threw back her head and laughed. "HA! Me? Not able to handle my booze? You're joking, right? I'm not Kashoku."

The corner of Ramirez's mouth curled up smugly as she darted another glance up through her hair. "No? That's a shame. She does get flirty when she's drunk." She finished lacing up her boots over her jeans and grabbed her jacket. "Alright, let's go get ready for the best night you've ever had on Earth."

"Well, that certainly wouldn't take much," Kage murmured as she followed behind out of the locker room. Ramirez drove them to her apartment, throwing her keys on the table as they entered through the door. It was small, but homey, rich rugs offsetting the crappy floor and colorful pillows and throws thrown about the worn looking couch and matching thick chair. Ramirez had shown Kage a little about her heritage sometimes during their spare time, and the décor looked familiar.

Before Kage could follow her far inside, Ramirez was calling out loudly. "Antonio!"

"¿Qué?" A voice rang out from one of the other rooms.

"¡Venir aqui!" Ramirez hollered back.

A man came out of the side room who looked a lot like Ramirez, only with about a foot on her and a buzz cut. It was hard to tell if he was older or younger given his height, but his face still held some youth that Ramirez didn't have. He gave Ramirez a sour look. "¿Qué chingados quieres?" he asked again.

"Don't fucking give me that attitude," Ramirez growled. "Antonio, this is my co-worker Kage. Kage, this is my baby bro, Antonio."

Antonio didn't look impressed, but obligingly jerked his chin up in greeting. "Sup?"

Kage didn't bother answering, equally unimpressed.

"We're going out tonight. You have plans?"

"Duh," Antonio responded as if he were insulted she had even asked the question.

"Chingado," Ramirez hissed as she jabbed her brother in the chest. "What crawled up your ass today, huh? It better crawl itself right back out or I'll cut up your fake ID and then you'll be going nowhere."

"Ok, ok, sorry," he winced as he rubbed at the spot his sister had hit him. "Yes, I'm going out."

"Don't get arrested," she said simply before turning back to Kage. "Come on, let's go find you some shit." She led Kage towards the room across from Antonio's and opened up a closet. "Take whatever fits. You have a bigger foot than me, but lucky for you military boots are in style these days."

Kage gingerly began looking through the clothes, not having the slightest idea what to pick. "Uh. Shit, I don't know. Something black?"

Ramirez gave an amused huff. "Damn, chica, why don't you just dye your hair black, too?"

Kage's eyes lit up. "When can we do that?"

"Well, I somehow don't think I can get the guys to go for that one, so it might have to wait until you get a little more freedom and you and I can have a girls' date," she said, reaching past Kage to grab a dark grey shirt, worn with age, and a black jacket. "What about this? It's worn thin enough it shouldn't get all stretched out over those tits of yours."

Kage shrugged, not overly bothered if it did end up being tight across the chest. Spiran fashion was all about showing off the torso, male or female, so she was still adjusting to Earth's weird hang-ups about hinting too much at the body underneath. "It looks fine. Is it appropriate for where we're going?"

Ramirez laughed. "Chica, I don't go anywhere where I can't wear ripped jeans and a t-shirt." She threw the clothes at Kage. "Let's go, get dressed. Quicker we get out of here, the quicker we can get drunk. I think I've got some pants that might fit you."

Kage began switching out her own clothes for the ones Ramirez had thrown at her, wondering what she'd look like with dark hair. Once they finally found a pair of jeans that fit Kage's thinner hips, the material clinging skin-tight to her muscled thighs, it didn't take long for either of them to get ready. Neither one really cared about make-up nor doing much with their hair, though Ramirez insisted Kage drop the ponytail. Apparently, letting their hair down was a saying for going out and getting wild for a reason. Kage relented for the thirty seconds it took to twist it into a long braid over her shoulder, a smartass act that got her a quick punch in the arm.

Antonio was already gone by time they walked out and headed back for the car. "The shit-head's nineteen, so he's technically not supposed to be out drinking at all, but I'm not dumb enough to think he wouldn't find a way if I took his ID away," Ramirez said on the drive. "I told Mamá I'd look out for him, but Tony's not as much an idiot as he acts. He gets in trouble, he knows he can call me and not get a lecture until the hangover's worn off. Well, unless he vomits in my car." The grimace on her face told Kage quite plenty there. "And don't you vomit either, or I swear I'll throw up on you and make you clean it all up."

McCabe's wasn't very far from the apartment, and the excitement crept in quickly as they entered, the tavern full of people. The bar scene was the most familiar thing Kage had felt her entire time on Earth, and she couldn't wait to feel the splash of alcohol down her throat.

"Look who finally decided to show!" Bentley raised his glass as he jumped up to wrap his free arm around Ramirez.

"Get your fucking hand off of me." Ramirez slapped his arm away and glowered.

Bentley puckered his lips in a pout. "Aw, Margarita, don't be like that."

"Aw, hell, look what the cat dragged in!" Carr grinned as he approached the group from the bar with a huge grin, grasping Bentley's hand and bringing him in for a hug.

"Well, we have to welcome our newest teammate into the wondrous world of drinky-drank!" Bentley wiggled his eyebrows in Kage's direction.

Kage responded with a roll of her eyes. "We have alcohol on Spira, you know. It's not exactly a foreign concept."

"Maybe not, but drinking with the most awesome people in the universe certainly is!" he said proudly, puffing out his chest.

"You sure do enjoy giving yourself far more credit than you deserve," Connors's voice rumbled as he joined them, beer already in hand. Even off-duty in normal clothes he still looked menacing, and Kage instinctually straightened her posture.

Rafe smirked as he, too, approached the group. "Well, sir, he has to be good at something."

"That's right!" Bentley raised his glass in cheer. "All my talent is saved for the bedroom. Ladies, you know what I mean!" He waggled his eyebrows at a nearby table of women and, though most rolled their eyes, one woman at least winked back.

"Oh god," Ramirez groaned as Rafe laughed into his beer. "I'm too sober to see this."

"Relax, Ramirez," Connors drawled as they all settled in at Bentley's table. "There's a pitcher coming."

Kage stood on her toes and tried to look around the crowded bar for Kashoku. She assumed since Carr was here that she wouldn't be far behind. "Is Kashy here?" she asked.

Carr shook his head and gave a shrug. "If she isn't I haven't seen her. When she comes it's usually with Wells and he said he had some shit to do or something tonight."

With Wells. Was that where she was? Kage tried not to let the scowl show on her face, but the thought somewhat irritated her that she might have been ditched for dick. "I need alcohol."

"Well, my dear, you've come to the right place," Bentley wrapped an arm around Kage's shoulders, despite the imminent threat of being socked in the face. "What's your poison?"

"Something strong," she stated plainly as she let herself be led through the hordes of people towards the bar.

"We-e-ll, you could," Bentley shrugged, "but I say we make the night last and start off small. You can never go wrong with beer. Hey, baby! Come give Daddy some sugar!" he whistled in Michelle's direction, earning him a middle finger.

"You have the absolute worst pick-up lines I've ever seen from someone," Kage scowled.

Bentley grinned. "Whatever. That's Carr's wife, she's used to it." Despite his comments, a cold beer was slammed in front of him without a word. "Thanks, babe!"

He handed it to Kage who took one sip and cringed. "This tastes like piss!"

"Exactly!" He grinned with a pleased slap to her back. "You're drinking to get drunk tonight, not to enjoy it. Now come on, let's go teach you how to be kick-ass at pool."

Kage almost felt completely at home again in the bar. It was comfortable and easy, drinking terrible alcohol and scaring off strangers who tried to hit on her. She even picked up quickly on how to play pool, and she and Ramirez were destroying Bentley and Rafe easily.

"Damn, girl, you sure you don't have this game back on Spira?" Rafe asked as he watched Kage sink another ball.

"Nope," Kage smirked as she analyzed the table for her next shot.

"She's always been a natural at these sorts of things."

Kage's head shot up to see Kashoku smiling at her from a few feet away. Her eyes lit up. "Kashy! I thought you weren't going to come."

Kashoku shrugged. "I was in the neighborhood."

"There she is!" Carr spotted her and brought her into a hug. "Where's Brandon?"

"I didn't come with him," Kashoku answered apologetically.

Carr lifted an eyebrow. "That's a first. Well, come on, then, let's get you something to drink."

Kashoku bit at her lower lip, knowing she probably shouldn't have anymore, but she only nodded and followed her teammate to the bar.

"Would you hurry up and take your shot already? Our only hope at this point is if you knock the eight-ball in by accident," Rafe commented, trying to snap Kage out of her gaze towards Kashoku.

Kage gave a snort as she rubbed some more chalk on the end of her stick and lined it up with the cue ball, "Please. That's not going to happen." With her tongue sticking out in concentration she hit the ball and sunk the last solid before the eight. Kage shot Rafe a pleased look. "I think you owe us drinks when we beat you. Again."

"I know an expensive tequila that's calling my name," Ramirez agreed as she leaned up against her stick and watched as Kage decided which pocket she wanted to sink the eight.

Rafe could do nothing but succumb to another defeat and another burning hole in his pocket as he racked his stick and headed to the bar to order tequila shots for the two women. He might have even thrown in another two for himself and Bentley, because the sting of defeat was burning. "Man, we made a mistake teaching our girl the game," he told his partner, turning to watch the last shot while they waited for Michelle.

"Did we?" Bentley asked with a leer, watching as Kage leaned over to take her final shot, borrowed jeans fitting tight along her backside, "Did we really?"

"Yeah, nah, man, I'm drinking your shot too. You're too close to death already."

"What, no!"

Bentley managed to snatch up two of the shots as soon as Michelle put them down and danced away, Rafe on his heels with the other two after thanking her. Kashoku returned with them and the shots were taken.

Kage didn't fail to notice the forlorn look on her friend's face, despite the many people vying for her attention. "What's wrong now?"

Kashoku clenched her drink and looked absently at the balls Bentley was gathering up from the pockets to rack back into the triangle. "Did you know that Daniel wanted to die?"

Oh, geez, not this again. Kage gave a heavy sigh and propped her elbows up on the table behind her. "What the hell are you talking about? Who told you that?"

"Do you think it was because of me?" she asked.

Kage squinted at her friend through the dark lighting, taking the time now to really look at her: cheeks bright red and eyes watering. She reached for the drink in her hand and snatched it away, placing it out of Kashoku's reach. "Holy shit, how much have you had?!"

"Answer the question!" Kashoku whined, not really concerned that Kage had taken her drink from her.

Kage let a growl rumble in her throat, the fun she had been having quickly dissipating. "You know what I think? I think you need to go at least 24 fucking hours without bringing up Daniel just once!"

"Aw shit, she crying over Jackson again?" Bentley asked, stumbling over to their position with another round of shots in hand. He set them down on the bar top and handed one to Kashoku. "Here, take this! The more you drink, the more you forget!"

Kage attempted to take the shot out of Kashoku's hand, but she had already down the liquor and set the glass down, coughing at the potency. Kage glowered at her teammate. "I really don't think giving her more alcohol is the best idea."

"You want her to shut up don't you?" Bentley asked.

"Yes, but-"

"Well, then, more drinky-drank!" Bentley said simply as he retrieved the drink Kage had hidden and gave it back to Kashoku. "The teary-eyes only lasts through that middle-ground, you know what I'm saying?"

"If it weren't for the fact I know you know better, I'd take you for a rapist who got girls drunk and took them home," Ramirez said with a roll of her eyes and a disapproving cross of her arms.

"Aw, shit, Margarita, it isn't any fun when they just lie there, Christ!" Bentley responded. "I ain't into all that shit!"

"Well you wouldn't know, giving her all that alcohol when she probably doesn't need it," Ramirez answered back with an irritated wave of her hand.

"Ah, she looks alright. Look, she's already forgotten about Jackson." Rafe tipped the top of his bottle in her direction where she was now flirting with a man at the bar.

The man was handsome and young, and he definitely seemed interested in Kashoku who had turned an even brighter shade of red between the alcohol and the flirting. "Good." Kage let out a sigh of relief. "She should go get laid and forget about Jackson because I swear if I have to listen to her cry over him one more time I might kill someone at the SGC."

Connors, who hadn't said much during their time at McCabe's eyed her with a suspicious glance. "I find it hard to believe that even you, for all your insensitivity, aren't more sympathetic towards a person you regard as your best friend after she lost someone close."

"It's really not all that hard to believe," Kage countered, tired of the conversation and picking up the cue ball to set it in place to break for a new game. "I'm kind of a bitch, or has that been forgotten somewhere along the line?"

"Aw fuck," Carr muttered as he quickly set down his beer and took off. "Someone hold her back!"

"What do you mean someone hold me-" But Kage saw it. The man Kashoku had been flirting with was suddenly grabbing onto her, despite her protests. The buzz she had gotten dissipated rapidly and was replaced with a fuming rage, but Rafe had a tight grip on her arm before she could so much as take a step.

"He's got this," Rafe promised her as they watched Carr approach the man. There were heated words exchanged, but Carr easily managed to pull Kashoku away and back towards the group.

"I-I-," Kashoku turned pale as she doubled over, clinging to Carr.

"Ok, time to go," Carr sighed, wrapping his arms around her to help straighten her back up. "Tell Michelle where I went, ok?"

Ramirez nodded. "Yeah, I got it, get her out of here." She watched as the two slowly made their way out of the bar and then turned to Kage. "You aren't worried at all?"

"What, because Kashoku can't handle her alcohol? That's nothing I don't already know. She's with Carr, she'll be fine," Kage shrugged; just honestly glad to not have a sobbing mess around her anymore. "Come on, it's time for me to kick your ass again, Bentley."

"Aww, fuck, can't we just team up?"

Kashoku's entire world was spinning. Even when she had been taken out on their first trip to McCabe's she didn't feel half this bad. Her head was throbbing and with every motion of the vehicle she felt her stomach about to empty itself. She had no idea how long they had been in the vehicle before she almost fell out of the car when the door opened, and a pair of hands grabbed her and pulled her out onto her feet.

"Come on, Kashy," Carr's soothing voice came from her side. At least, she was pretty sure it was Carr. Wasn't it?

He led her up a few sets of stairs before coming to a stop and fumbling around his jeans for something. Colors were all blurred together, and Kashoku couldn't make any sense of where she was until a door opened and she heard a voice she could never mistake.

"Are you fucking kidding me!?" Ellis barked in a hushed tone. "Were you not paying attention to how much she was drinking?"

No, not here. Anywhere but here! She didn't want him to see her like this!

"I had no idea! Bentley kept feeding her shots behind our back, and I'm pretty sure there were other guys at the bar buying her shit where Michelle and I couldn't keep track," Carr spoke in his defense as he lifted Kashoku back up and through the door.

Kashoku could feel herself being handed off to Ellis and that's when her stomach gave its final protest. She was going to hurl. Ellis must have realized it, because she was suddenly being whisked away and somehow the contents that came up ended up in the toilet. She gasped in between heaves, letting herself completely sink to the bathroom floor, hands gripping onto the edges of the seat as she shook.

"Matt? What's-Oh my god, is she ok?!"

"Amy, go get me some water and some towels. And something to hold her hair back," Ellis ordered, his voice still hushed as to not wake the kids. "Carr, just get out of here. I've got this."

"Yes, sir," Carr's voice answered solemnly.

Kashoku felt a soothing hand on her back, but it didn't help. She still felt the need to vomit and empty her stomach of the poison she had filled it with, but it didn't seem to want to come. Tears spilled from her eyes as she gripped tighter. Her hair was pulled back away from her face and she then found herself choking on what she was sure were someone's fingers before the bile rose and she was doubled over once more.

"Do we need to take her to the hospital?" Amy's concerned voice came.

"It's bad, but I don't think she's that far gone. I'm helping coax it out," Ellis responded.

Their voices became indistinguishable mumbles as she shook and cried, begging for the feeling to go away, but it just kept coming for what seemed like forever. And then the darkness came.

"How many people is it going to take to tell you it's not your fault before you actually believe it?" Daniel took a seat next to her at the edge of the lake, the water crystal clear and reflecting the blue and green hues of the forest.

Kashoku didn't answer him, only tugged her bare feet closer to her chest and wrapped her arms around them. "Why did you want to die?"

Daniel sucked in a breath and let his own bare feet touch the water as he leaned back on his hands. "I think there's a life after death where I can help people more than I could alive."

Kashoku turned to look at him. He was dressed in a white sweater and pants and his glasses were absent. "How?"

Daniel looked at her and smiled with an unknowing shake of his head. "I'm not sure yet."

Kashoku didn't like his answer and looked away again. They sat there in silence for a long time before she spoke again. "I really miss you." A tear drop rippled against the water. "I wish I had never agreed to let you go."

Daniel sighed, sitting up straight. "It wouldn't have changed anything. I'd still be gone. I don't regret a single second we shared, and I wouldn't have changed anything. Just having been able to know you is one of the greatest things I've had in my life." He reached over and pried one of Kashoku's hands loose so that he could hold it. "But you've got to let your guilt go. You have to let me go."

"It's so hard," Kashoku sobbed, squeezing his hand tight.

"It was hard when I lost Sha're too, but I had my family back at the SGC who helped me through it. You have a family who will help you too. Let them."

Kashoku took in a deep breath and wiped at her tears with her free hand. "I guess my dreams will just have to do for now."

"I'll pop in if I can," Daniel assured her.

Kashoku let out a gentle laugh. "You say that like a dream has nothing better to do than just 'pop in and out'."

Daniel met her eyes and smiled widely. "Who says I'm a dream?"


	6. Chapter 6

"I don't know how to say it," Rodd sighed, his voice tired and thick with his Georgian accent. "Every time I think I have the courage to approach her, something happens. I thought I was finally going to be able to do it on Tuesday, but as soon as I opened my mouth she snapped at me."

Kage let out a heavy sigh as she listened to Rodd pour out his problems. Even Yevon probably was scratching its head at the thought, but somewhere down the line Kage had grown kind of soft around the young and cowardly lieutenant. His recent problems communicating with Kashoku should've had her walking out, but instead here she was, giving a sympathetic ear. "That's because she was battling a massive hangover on Tuesday. Bad timing. If you want my opinion, just let it go. I just managed to convince Kashoku Daniel dying wasn't her fault. I don't need you to add to the guilt party that's going around here. Even if you hadn't been injured, it wouldn't have made a difference."

Rafe placed a gentle hand on Rodd's shoulder in agreement. "She's right. Kashoku doesn't hold you responsible. In fact, she mentioned to me the other day during lunch that she was upset you were ignoring her."

Rodd lifted his head marginally, a small glimmer of hope in his brown eyes. "Really?"

"Trust me," Kage said dryly, "Kashoku gets really upset if anyone ignores her. Do you honestly think I liked her when we first met? I became friends with her because it's easier than hating her."

Rafe couldn't help but chuckle. "She really knows how to reel you in, doesn't she?"

Kage huffed in grievance. "Why are you in the military anyway?" The abrupt question was directed at Rodd. It was something that had been on her mind for a while. Unlike Kage's own team, SG-1, and most others she'd worked with, Rodd didn't really fit the soldier mold. She'd actually thought for a while that the guy was like Jackson, pure civilian, until Bentley laughingly corrected her.

Rodd's shoulders slumped and he sank further into Ramirez's office chair. "Believe it or not, our military is really only 20% combat, 80% combat support. I was promised a life doing science in front of a computer providing Intel or whatever else was needed. I never wanted to be put in combat situations, but recruiters lie."

Rafe threw back his head and laughed. "That they most certainly do! Come on, man, you can't regret it though. You could've gotten the desk job you wanted, but you'd never know about what's out there."

Rodd hardly looked convinced by that logic. "There are plenty of scientists here who don't have to see combat. I don't understand why I can't be one of them."

"You do realize that all of the lab rats are civilians, right?" Rafe inquired with an amused upward tug of his lips.

"Yes, I noticed," he groaned, leaning forward to hide his face in the pillow of his arms.

"So then don't be afraid anymore," Kage suggested simply. "You're too useful on the field brain-wise to get benched, so stop thinking about it and wishing for what won't happen. Work on what you can change. If you learn to kick ass in combat, you won't have this problem."

The confused, despairing look Rodd gave when he dared to peek up at her wasn't really surprising. She'd just have to show him what she meant. Standing up from her chair, she grabbed hold of Rodd's jacket collar, heaving him upright with a firm pull and dragging him out of SG-11's office. "It'll be a long process, so might as well start now."

Rodd stumbled and almost fell, unable to get his gangly limbs coordinated as she dragged him about, but another tug from Kage kept him on his feet. She released his collar while he regained his balance, only to put a hand on his back and steer him forward again. "Wait, where are we going?!"

"Where do you think? The gym. Rafe, you coming?" she asked, tossing a look over her shoulder. The man in question was stepping out into the hallway, surprise still all over his face.

"And leave all this paperwork behind – some of which is yours?" Rafe asked pointedly. "Damn right I'm coming."

Rodd managed to wiggle his way out of Kage's hold while she waited for her teammate to catch up, but he didn't take his chance to run. His curiosity had him wondering what the terrifying woman had planned. "Why are we going to the gym?"

"You want to man up and not be such a coward anymore, don't you?" Kage asked as she jammed the elevator button repeatedly.

Rodd shrunk in on himself and shrugged. "I don't know. I guess?"

Kage placed her hands on her hips and drew herself up so that she seemed far larger than the man before her. "The answer to that question is yes," she said dangerously, "because if you don't learn to toughen up you're likely to put Kashy in danger or get her killed. And if that happens, you're dead. You get me?" He didn't get a chance to answer her with the elevator doors opening up behind, but his expression was enough for her to know that he understood. She turned and boarded the elevator and, apprehensively, Rodd followed her.

"Don't worry," Rafe spoke cheerfully as the doors closed behind him and the elevator lurched with motion. "I won't let her kill you."

If it weren't for the fact he had absolutely no where to go, Kage was sure Rodd would have bailed as quickly as possible. The elevator ride was brief, but it gave Rodd time to psych himself out and the lieutenant was looking more than a little freaked when the doors opened. It wasn't far to the gym, however, and sandwiched as he was between her and Rafe, he had no real choice but to see this through. When she kicked off her shoes and stripped off her jacket, tossing it to Rafe to set with his, Rodd hesitantly followed suit. She then moved to the mat in the middle of the room and motioned for him to join her. Rafe stayed along the borders, arms crossed and a smile pulling at his lips.

"Don't break our boy, Kage," he cautioned good-naturedly.

"Why? Would you be jealous?" she threw back, sticking the tip of her tongue out through a grin. "Don't worry, baby, I'll save all that for you."

"Mm-hmm," Rafe leered. Then, "Jeremy, if you manage to knock this one on her ass, I'll buy you lunch tomorrow."

Rodd swallowed audibly, and Kage threw a quick eye roll at Rafe. "You knock me on my ass, I'll buy you lunch," she said dryly. "Alright. Get ready. Put your hands up." Kage put her own up in emphasis, ready to fight.

She could see Rodd swallow hard again, his brown eyes widening with fear and a bright flush creeping up his neck and ears, freckles popping against the redness.

Kage dropped her hands irritably and placed them on her hips. "I haven't even hit you yet!"

"But you're going to!" he argued.

"Yeah, so defend yourself so that I don't break your nose!"

Rodd's hands instantly went to covering his nose, and his eyes squeezed shut in anticipation of a hit. Kage almost didn't even know how to respond to the complete and utter shut down, until she decided to walk up to him and push him flat on his back.

"Ow!" Rodd cried out as he hit the mat with a thud.

"Oh, did that hurt?"

"Yes!"

"Well maybe if you hadn't closed your eyes, you wouldn't have ended up down there." Kage frowned, crossing her arms above him. "Try actually defending yourself next time."

"It wouldn't matter if I tried defending myself or not. I'll still end up down here," he argued as he pushed himself back up to his feet. His ears were an angry shade of red now, and he refused to look at her. It was such a complete shutdown that Kage quickly decided her initial plan to be gentle with Rodd was just not going to cut it. A quick glance in Rafe's direction showed him also frowning, and when their eyes met, he nodded imperceptibly.

"Probably," she agreed with a shrug of her shoulders. "But a shot not taken is a guaranteed miss." She reached out and shoved Rodd again, not enough to knock him over, but enough to send him back a few steps.

"Cut it out," he growled as he easily regained his footing. Kage pushed him again. "Stop!"

"Make me," she challenged, adding extra force to her shove this time. Rodd stayed upright. He didn't back up when she got closer for another shove, but he didn't try to keep her away either, despite the sour expression that had wiped the scared look off his face. When she shoved him again, Rodd let out a slight growl as his foot hit the edge of the mat, and his eyes were set in a narrow, warning stare. Kage gave him her bitchiest smile, a nasty mocking curl to her lips. "Gee, Rodd, who taught you to be such a fucking wuss – your mom?"

Rodd snapped. The thin veneer of control he'd been hanging onto was thrown out the window, and she barely got through all the words before a hand connected with her chest in a surprisingly strong show of force. Her back slammed down against the mat and for a second, air wouldn't come.

"Don't you ever talk about my mom!" Rodd snapped from above her, his brow creased in anger. From the tension throughout his body and the veins standing prominent on his fists and forearms, he looked like he'd like to follow her down and make sure she listened. Kage kept her mouth shut.

Rafe, however, felt no such need. He exploded with laughter on the sidelines, covering his mouth as he whooped. "Aw, shit, you did it now, Kage. You never insult a southern boy's mama."

The moment of shock shifted into a quiet delight as Kage sat up and gave Rodd a smile, ignoring her teammate and the pain in her chest. He'd hit her right on her fucking boobs which hurt like a bitch, but Kage was willing to forgive Rodd that in light of his success. "See? You do have it in you. Looks like Rafe and I owe you a lunch."

The praise seemed to pull through Rodd's haze of anger. As the realization hit, the man reverted back into cringing submission, grabbing his ginger curls in a panic. "Oh god, I'm so sorry! I just wanted you to stop! Please don't kill me!"

Kage groaned and flopped back on the mat as Rafe began laughing anew. "Well… It's a start."

Kashoku might have been imagining it, but she was sure that it wasn't just Rodd that was ignoring her lately. Wells had seemed to be giving her the cold shoulder of late, and it had been eating at her since she noticed it. Usually he would go out of his way to speak with her or invite her to eat with him, but there had been none of that for the past two weeks. But, she hadn't exactly taken the initiative, either. Maybe that was it. With a sigh she looked down at her watch and noticed that it was close to lunch time. She should invite him to go to the chow hall with her.

Pushing her chair back away from the desk she rose and put on a smile as she approached his desk. "Hey!"

"Hey," he spoke drearily, evading her gaze by staring straight at his computer screen.

"It's almost lunch time. You wanna go?" She asked hopefully.

"I've got too much work to do right now," He responded plainly, beginning to type away fervently.

Kashoku bit at her lip, worriedly. Wells always looked for an excuse to get out of doing any kind of work. "You need to eat. You sure you can't take a break?"

Wells sucked in an annoyed breath and glared up at her. "I said I was busy."

She flinched at the tone of his voice, the pure venom unexpected in it. "Ok, I'm sorry," she spoke slowly as she backed away from him feeling crushed that her suspicions had proved to be correct. Looking up she looked longingly at Rodd who looked like he might ask if he could tag along. "You want to go?"

She was sure he was about to say yes, but he looked down at his watch and shook his head. "Sorry, I got to be somewhere in a few minutes."

Kashoku didn't say anything as she disappointingly turned on her heel and walked out on her own.

After almost two weeks of being completely ignored by half of her team, Kashoku was excited to go on the next mission. Being out in the universe meant that Rodd and Wells had to interact with her at some point. Kashoku had accepted rather quickly that Rodd would need to approach her on his own, but what really bothered her more than anything was the cold shoulder from Wells. He had taken every opportunity to avoid her. She was sure they hadn't even exchanged a 'good morning' in the past week. At least if they were split up, she knew he'd be forced to talk with her then. They always paired up together.

As though hearing her thoughts, Wells caught Ellis's attention as their commander finished speaking with the general of this city's military. "I'll go with Carr to check out the armory on the eastern side. See if their aircraft are as cool as they claim."

Kashoku whipped her head to the side to stare angrily at her teammate as Wells gazed off into the distance. What was wrong with him lately? By all rights Kashoku should've been the one acting strange after Daniel's death, and yet here Wells was, acting as though she were contagious!

Even Ellis seemed surprised by the pairing, but unlike Kashoku he let it slide off easily with a shrug. "Okay. Rodd and Kash, go check out that greenhouse thing General Jiva was talking about while I go with him to meet the governor."

"Yes, sir!" Rodd spoke up enthusiastically as he moved to stand next to Kashoku.

"Geez, what is this, fucking Freaky Friday?" Ellis muttered as he walked off with the elder general. Kashoku could distantly hear the general inquiring what Ellis meant by his comment, but they were too far away to hear her commander's response.

To her left, Carr was calling for Wells to wait up, his partner had set off seconds after Ellis turned his back. No doubt to avoid any more time spent around her, she thought bitterly. Why was he acting so strange? Was it possible that Wells thought she should have been able to save Daniel and was holding a grudge? No, Kashoku didn't believe that. She wouldn't. But maybe it was possible that after seeing her White Mage fail her, Wells was reevaluating how safe he felt around her.

Kashoku kicked at the ground, irritable with all this second guessing. It all sounded stupid in her head, and maybe that was the problem. Maybe Wells was just being an idiot – just being a guy, Sam would no doubt tell her with a scoff – and would come around. She wasn't sure how much more of this she could take.

"Are you okay?" Rodd asked Kashoku, touching her lightly on the arm. Judging by the concern on his face, it wasn't the first time he'd spoken to her.

She hadn't even realized he had been talking to her. With a shake of her head to clear those thoughts away, she nodded. "Yeah, sorry. I got a little lost in my head there. Lead the way."

"Right!" He grinned as he stepped back and headed down the marked dirt path with a bounce. "I'm kind of excited to see this system they are using for their crops. We've been working on something similar back on earth, but sustainability has been a big issue, and whenever we get close to a solution, circumstances arise to set everything back again. But it sounds like the greenhouse they've built actually reads and adapts to nutrient levels in the soil to produce good crops with limited strain on the earth. If we can figure out how to replicate that on Earth, it could really revolutionize farming."

Rodd made a quick face. "Of course, it would have to be declassified first and knowing the government, I doubt the technology would be made available to the people who really need it, whose livelihood could only be benefited by something like this. It'll probably be hushed up or sold to the highest bidder. But one day, Kashoku, I guarantee it, the Stargate Program will be declassified and this kind of thing will have to get out, and then the real good can come."

He seemed so alive right then, the bright sunlight of Ghamor setting his red curls aflame, grinning at her with freckle-spotted cheeks as he segued back into rhapsodizing on farming methods. The warm, largely-pastoral planet was good for Rodd, who had told her on their first mission here that it reminded him of his childhood. That mission had been spent acquainting themselves with the local city's military, and then the military's ground mounts. They hadn't been all that different from the horses of Earth, except Ghamorese mounts had a great deal more size and bulk to them. Had it not been for Rodd's great enthusiasm over the horses, her team's alarm likely would've been taken as an insult; instead, they'd all been offered ponies into the city and a grand dinner, and were sent home with an invitation back.

To Carr's clear relief, no one had met them with horses today. Rodd, however, had seemed disappointed when they'd stepped through and were told they wouldn't need to ride anywhere. None of that earlier disappointment showed now as he waved at a pair of children leading a pony twice their height in the opposite direction. The children shyly waved back and fell into giggling whispers as they passed.

"You're unusually bubbly today, even for having new technology to go explore," she commented, a soft smile on her lips, though she regarded him with confusion. She was glad for the fact Rodd was finally making an effort to talk with her again, but she couldn't help but be taken aback by his sudden loquaciousness. Much as Rodd liked Ghamor, he'd practically tried to melt into the floor during the briefing when Ellis attributed the first mission's success to him. It wasn't comfort or pride of recognition loosening her teammate's tongue or having him stand taller today, and she doubted he'd really gotten over whatever was keeping him distant of late. It must be something else, she decided, eyeing him curiously.

Rodd blushed under her perusal and gave a half-hearted shrug, clearly trying to sober up outwardly. "I'm just really excited about this morning, I guess."

Kashoku shuffled through the various events of the morning, trying to think what he could possibly be excited about, but truth be told, she hadn't even seen him until they were going through the gate. "What happened this morning?" she asked, genuinely curious now.

Rodd stopped, planting his feet firmly on the ground with squared shoulders and a proudly puffed chest. "I hit Kage. Properly, too, not just a shove."

Kashoku could feel herself flinch in surprise at the comment, mouth gaping. "I-wait- What did you say?" Almost unbidden, Kashoku perused her teammate's body, checking for any obvious injuries. Nothing stood out, but the uniforms covered almost the entire body. Or perhaps Rodd had been sensible enough to go to the infirmary – but then Janet would want to know what had happened. Was Kage going to be sent back to Spira? Kashoku stared wide-eyed and open-mouthed at Rodd as these disastrous thoughts flew through her mind.

Rodd laughed, something he so rarely did, and he looked so happy that Kashoku slowly closed her mouth and just looked at him in wonder. "Kage's been training me," he explained as he gestured for them to slowly start back on their walk, "to help me try to get over my fear of, well, everything."

This kept getting more and more unbelievable. "Kage? As in Kage from Spira is training you? How exactly is that going?"

"Painfully," Rodd sighed in amusement. "You should have seen the bruises I had after our sessions earlier this week."

"Why didn't you come to me?!" Kashoku cried. She couldn't decide which emotion was dominant in that moment - irritation that Kage had actually gone as far as to hit him or hurt that he hadn't come to her for help.

"Kage made me swear under threat of fist to go to Dr. Fraiser instead of you," he said. "Although I'm pretty sure she was a lot angrier about it than you would have been."

Kashoku rolled her eyes, not at all surprised that Kage was trying to keep this a secret from her. But, honestly, once she got past the shock of it all… She felt a sense of pride that Kage was reaching out to one of her teammates, especially that it was Rodd. He would have been the last person she would have figured Kage would offer a helping hand to, and yet here he was, proudly telling her about landing a hit on a woman who'd not-so-secretly terrified him for months. Kashoku let out a slow breath and placed a gentle hand on Rodd's shoulder. "Well…just be careful, okay? Kage sometimes doesn't know her own strength."

"Tell me about it," he groaned as he absently rubbed at his nose, clearly in remembrance of a wound now healed. "Major Rafe comes to all our sessions to make sure she doesn't kill me."

"Good," Kashoku nodded, satisfied that at least someone was watching his back. "So… It's working, you think?"

Rodd shrugged. "Maybe? I guess I won't really know until we come into contact on a mission. I have a long way to go still, but… Yeah." He smiled sweetly at her. "I think maybe at least now my first thought won't be to run away. It'll just be my second."

"You punched Kage and lived to tell the tale," Kashoku teased. "I'm pretty sure it won't be you running away when that gets out." Rodd ducked his head in shy pleasure, and Kashoku gave him a moment to recover before she shifted the conversation. "So is all this confidence boosting what made you decide to finally speak to me again?" She asked it in jest, not wanting to hurt his feelings bringing up the subject, but she couldn't deny that subject any longer.

Rodd's mood visibly dimmed as he hung his head, his entire countenance portraying shame for having ignored her at all. "Sort of. I was feeling so bad that first week that just seeing you was awful. I kept trying to apologize to you, but I could never get the courage. Kage told me that you didn't blame me, that you were upset I had been ignoring you, but I just couldn't do it until today. I'm sorry."

"Ah, so you'll believe Kage, but not me? I'm hurt," Kashoku spoke with a pout. "Next thing you know, you'll say you like her more than me."

Rodd looked honestly mortified at the accusation. "Not to be rude, but there's no way that would ever happen. Even when she's being nice, she's scary."

For the first time since Daniel died, Kashoku doubled over in laughter. She had missed the feeling of letting herself be able to let her problems go, and for a moment she even forgot about being mad at Wells. "Come on," she breathed in between the fading giggles. "We've got a job to do, my badass friend."

It turned out that the Ghamorese indeed had more to offer than just oversized horses. Rodd had given an excited thumbs up to the greenhouse technology and when they rendezvoused with their team, Wells and Carr reported positive things about their aircraft. SG-15 returned to Earth with good news for Hammond that would hopefully lead to treaty talks with one of the political teams within the next few weeks, and Kashoku herself was feeling decidedly happier with her team situation.

She'd had time on the walk back to the gate to think about how she was going to approach Wells, but when she arrived back at the office after changing into her civilian clothes, her new plan crumbled around her. He was already long gone. With a frustrated sigh she let her purse fall on top of his desk. "Damn it…"

Before she could regroup mentally and think up a plan B, a familiar voice was calling from the open doorway behind her. "Oh, good, you're still here!" Sam Carter was leaning in the doorway, a cheerful smile on her face. "I saw that you guys had gotten back in not long ago. I was hoping I'd catch you before you left."

Kashoku returned the smile, happy to see her friend. Between SG-1's grounding following Daniel's death and SG-15 picking up some of the lead team's slack, there just hadn't been any time lately for them to see one another. Sam looked worlds better than the last time they'd crossed paths, only a few days following the funeral. "Hey! Yeah, lucky for you I forgot something and had to come get it. What's up?"

Sam walked in and pulled up a chair to the center island, Kashoku following suit. "There was kind of something I wanted to talk to you about."

Kashoku's heart sank in worry at her friend's serious expression. "Is everything okay?"

"No, yeah, yeah!" Sam responded swiftly. "Everything's fine. We were just going through Daniel's things and we've been trying to figure out what to do with a lot of it. He doesn't have any family that we can give it to. I realized that his Jeep was still parked here and since it's paid off I thought… Well, maybe you'd want it?" She pulled the keys in question from her pocket and set them on the desk.

Kashoku blinked in surprise. "You want me to have his car?"

"Well, yeah," Sam nodded. "It can't just sit there forever, and it would save us the trouble of having to put it up on the market. This way you wouldn't have to rely on your teammates to give you rides all the time either. Plus," she gave her a sad smile, "I really think he'd want you to have it."

Kashoku gingerly reached out for the keys. It wasn't just Daniel's car key on the chain, four or five others keeping it company. She fiddled with them, fondly thinking about where each one went and memories of what they unlocked. One for his apartment, one for the safe in his closet, one for the china cabinet with his most precious small artifacts, his office key… With a hesitant nod she decided. "Okay. I… Thank you, Sam. I really appreciate it. This will help out a lot."

Sam took her hands in hers and squeezed before moving to stand. "I really wish I could hang out tonight, but I've got a ton of work to do in the lab. Any plans for the weekend?"

"Well, I hope so, now," Kashoku responded, slinging her purse over her shoulder. "Saturday night, around 8?"

"Great," Sam grinned. "I'll see if Janet can join us too. I'd invite Kage, but…"

"Mm, she doesn't have that much of a leash quite yet," Kashoku laughed. "Maybe if she continues to behave, we'll get there."

"How's she doing anyway?" Sam asked thoughtfully as they set off together down the hall to the elevator.

"You know? Really good," Kashoku replied, a fulfilling feeling rising up within her as she spoke those words. "She's finding her place, and she hangs out with her team a lot more than me."

Sam's brows shot up in surprise. "Wow. On purpose?"

Kashoku giggled. "Yeah, on purpose. I think she's even conspiring to steal my own team away from me. Carr spent all of yesterday moaning about how she keeps whipping his butt at basketball. And did you know she's taken Jeremy under her wing as her apprentice?"

The face Sam gave her was about the same she had given Rodd at that information. "She what?!"

"Yeah!" Kashoku confirmed with a nod. "She's apparently been teaching him how to fight! It's crazy."

Sam shook her head in pleased disbelief. "That's great, though. I have to admit, I didn't think she'd make it."

"You weren't the only one," Kashoku agreed, and they continued to catch up until the elevator opened up on the lab floor. "Don't work too hard," she bid her friend.

"Who needs sleep?" Sam joked. She stepped out and waved, and Kashoku pressed the button for the exit floor.

It was a weird feeling getting behind the wheel of the Jeep she had ridden in so many times. Nothing had changed from the last time she had been in it. It was still immaculately clean and the same Egyptian charm hung from the mirror. She turned on the engine and moved to shift gears when she noticed the phone connected to the charger, sitting in the groove on the dash. "Typical Daniel," she smiled fondly as she reached for it. "Always leaving his phone in here." The car, even turned off, had kept the phone charge and it lit up instantly as she pressed the button on the side. There were notifications of several missed calls, texts, and voicemails, but her heart stopped when she noticed the picture behind the notifications.

It was her.

The photo had been taken at the zoo on their last date. She had several bright colored birds perched on her shoulder and the seed stick she had been holding. Even after all those weeks he had never changed it. Lowering the phone she bit at her lip, refusing to cry. Daniel was gone, and continuing to hold on to his memory wasn't going to change anything. Right now, she needed to save the relationships of those that were still alive. Gathering herself back together she placed the vehicle in reverse and attempted to remember the route to Wells's house.

"So how about it? You up for another night on the town?" Ramirez asked, her hip cocked out to the side as she leaned against the lockers. Her long thick hair was down, curling over one shoulder and just touching the name of some band whose cover art decorated her black t-shirt. She wasn't really dressed for a night on the town as Kage had come to expect, the other woman tending towards lower necklines and nicer jeans than that worn looking pair to entice more free drinks her way, so Kage felt more confident in turning down the offer.

"I don't know," she voiced hesitantly, almost regretting her answer if only for rejecting a chance at the outside world. "I didn't think I'd ever say it, but almost two weeks straight of going out and drinking? I'm kind of tired of it. And I can't take another night of Bentley."

Ramirez gave a knowing laugh as she shifted her weight, not looking bothered at all. "Yeah, I can understand that. I guess after so many years with him I've learned to just pretend he doesn't exist."

"Yeah, well, I'm not there yet," Kage said as she reached back to tie her hair up.

"Well, I can go get us some movies and dinner? Bring it back here and just stay in for the night," she suggested.

Kage shrugged. "That's fine. But you don't have to do anything if you don't want to. I think I can survive a boring night by myself."

"Yeah, well," Ramirez looked away, "maybe I just want to, okay? You can even invite Kashoku if you want."

Kage thought about that. It had been a while since she and Kashoku had really hung out with each other, but she had a feeling this late in the day the woman was already gone. Standing up she reached for her friend's locker and popped it open because Yevon forbid the woman get a damn lock for the thing. Her purse was absent. "Looks like she's already got plans."

"Probably for the better. Knowing puta bonita she would have wanted to watch some fucking sappy chick flick." Ramirez pulled out her own personal items from her locker before slamming it shut and shoving her hands in her back pockets. "Any food suggestions?"

"Whatever's fine," Kage answered, truly indifferent to any of her options. She had never been extremely picky with food, and Earth did have a lot more variety than Spira so it kept it interesting.

"Okay, I'll be back in a bit then," Ramirez said, flashing a smile as she backed out of the locker room.

Kage popped out the crick in her neck before she closed her own locker and headed back to her room on base. In the last month alone, it had become significantly more inviting than the militaristic cell with a door it had seemed like when she first decided to stay. The walls were still hideous, but Kashoku and even her teammates had gotten or lent her things here and there that gave the room a more personal touch, and on top of the dresser her garment grid cast orange hues on the room that Kage rather liked.

She had never really had a place to call home before, not back on Spira. Her bed was wherever she could find one when she was hunting. Lunestiswas as close as she'd come, but even then it had been a bed set in the corner of an airship. She would never be caught dead admitting it to Kashoku, but she kind of liked it here.

Turning on the TV, Kage kicked off her boots and plopped back onto her bed. She wasn't sure when Ramirez would be back, so she might as well get comfortable.

By the time Kashoku finally made it to Wells's house through the missed turns and heavy traffic, it was almost dark. The sun was gone beneath the visible horizon and only a few rays still lit up the sky in the distance. Wells's house seemed dark, its porch light off, but his car was in the driveway and she could see a light on in the kitchen as she pulled in. Probably feeding Justice, she thought fondly, killing the engine.

Emotionally, Kashoku didn't feel up to this confrontation anymore, but now that she was here and not driving around endlessly, she couldn't turn back. This conversation needed to happen, and maybe she should wait for Wells to come to her, but… A part of her knew that he wouldn't come to her on base. So she strode across the yard, shoulders back, and if there was hesitation when she reached the door, nobody was there to notice. She reached out and rang the doorbell.

Instantly, Justice was at the door barking. If it weren't for the fact she was well acquainted with the dog he would have sounded very intimidating. Even still, the time she was left standing there, the Irish Setter kicking up a fuss on the other side of the door, was almost enough to have her changing her mind. Maybe Wells was out for a run or something. She shifted and made to turn away, but the porch light switched on at that moment, the locks tumbled, and Wells stood on the other side of the door, surprise on his face.

"Kash? What the hell are you doing here? How- Whose car is that?" he asked, giving the empty Jeep a confused look.

"Um, it's mine," she explained simply, tucking a loose strand of hair behind her ear in a nervous motion. "Can I come in?" she asked. She didn't want to talk about her new Jeep, or let Wells side-track the conversation.

He looked uncertain, closing the door slightly. "I don't know if that's a good idea."

"Please let me in," Kashoku pleaded, putting one hand on the frame and the other on the door itself, keeping it from shutting on her. She wasn't putting any weight into it, so Wells could've easily dislodged her, but he didn't push back.

Instead, Wells stepped away from the door with a heavy sigh, opening it with him, and turned his back as she walked in behind him. Justice stopped barking finally, recognizing her once she was fully inside, and eagerly showered Kashoku's hands with kisses. Wells continued towards the kitchen, and with one last pat to Justice, she followed after him. He was leaning heavily against the counter, nursing a glass of whiskey. The decanter was a few feet away on the table, so he must've been working on it before she showed up.

Wells met her troubled frown with a supercilious look, brow raised challengingly. He took a pointed sip of the whiskey, smacked his lips, and spoke. "Why are you here?" His voice, at least, was at odds with his arrogant demeanor, low and bogged down with exhaustion from their long week. It emboldened Kashoku, a new lick of irritation bolstering her tongue as she realized he was putting on an act, pushing her away in a way that just wasn't Wells.

"Why have you been acting this way?" she demanded.

"Acting what way, Kash?" he asked.

"You know exactly what I'm talking about," she countered angrily. "Ever since Daniel died you've refused to do anything with me, including saying 'hi'! You do your best to avoid me at every turn and won't even acknowledge my presence when we're in the same room together. You've been an ass! Why?!"

Wells put the glass to his lips and downed the entire last finger of whiskey. "If I recall, Rodd has been doing the exact same thing and I don't see you running off to his house to yell at him."

"That's because Jeremy is not you!" She shouted out, her heart stopping as the words left her lips. She had never meant to admit that. Wells knew it too by the way his eyes widened and his grip on his empty glass tightened, trying to bring it up for an aborted sip before he gingerly set it down on the counter. She could feel her heart beating rapidly against her chest, but there was no going back now. "I can't lose another person I'm close too, Brandon. I can't. Please don't shut me out."

Wells licked his lips and looked away, his entire belligerent attitude dropping until he stood there, pressed against the counter like a man lost, tired but honest. "I don't know how to approach you anymore, knowing that I was partly responsible for you not being able to save Jackson," he admitted, voice rough with regret. "And that I…" He made a frustrated noise after he trailed off, scrubbing at his face and hair roughly, but he didn't continue. He just looked at Kashoku guiltily.

She could've pressed, but really, Kashoku didn't need to. She knew, just as Daniel had known but never mentioned, what always sat unacknowledged between her and Wells. Instead she focused on what he had said, biting back her frustrated laugh because how stupid these men in her life were. "You weren't responsible, and neither was Jeremy. That kind of affliction is not something I can cure, even at full strength. I just can't." She sighed and tucked her hair back again. "I wish you had talked to me, Brandon. I could've told you this weeks ago. My healing you had nothing to do with my inability to help Daniel. You shouldn't feel guilty.

"We're in a dangerous line of work and people are going to die. Daniel knew that and he accepted his death. I've let it go. Please do the same. I hateit when you don't talk to me. I hate it when you look away and don't acknowledge me. With Jeremy I could take it. I knew he would come around on his own, but you?"

Wells didn't meet her gaze for a long time, absently tapping his glass gently on the counter top as he watched Justice gnaw on a toy in the doorway. For a while the dog's playful growls were the only noise in the kitchen before Wells looked up at her with tired eyes. "Why?"

"What?" she asked startled.

"Why me?" he asked again. Slowly, he set the glass down levelly and straightened up, waiting.

Kashoku took in a deep breath, trying to sort through all the hundreds of reasons she could tell him that would answer his question. She didn't voice any of those reasons. Instead she thought back to what he had almost said, and all the moments they'd used to share together, and came to a decision. She licked her lips and took a step forward, and bravely answered, "I could ask you the same thing."

There was only a second's pause before Wells dove in and pressed their lips together. Kashoku leaned into the kiss, reaching up to grab at his arms to steady herself. As soon as she gave that indication this was what she wanted, Wells let loose. He wrapped his strong arms around her torso and lifted her up, turning to set her level with him on the counter.

It was as though something had finally been set free within the both of them, a desperate need that they'd pushed down and ignored for too long. This wasn't the time for slow or sensual. It wasn't anything Kashoku had ever had with Daniel. Instead, the energy filling the room was desperate and purely sexual. There was no talking, no going slow. They grabbed at each other's clothing, ripping and clawing to get to skin, pulling away only to shuck shirts off, and then joining their mouths again desperately.

Wells's hands were all over her skin, unable to quench his thirst by the touches alone, his mouth burning hotly across her neck, jaw, the edge of a breast where the bra's cup ended. His thumb slipped under the wire to rub the base of her breast while his fingers danced across her ribs and Kashoku arched into the touch, dragging his head down to pillow between her breasts. His tongue dipped below the gore and licked a hot trail up the valley, and Kashoku pulled him back up to her mouth by his hair, kissing him over and over, sucking and nipping at his jaw while her legs tried to pull him in closer.

When Kashoku shoved her hands down his pants, brushing against his straining penis through the cotton of his boxers, Wells hissed and buried his face in the crook of her neck, pulling her hand away. Before she could try again, he was slipping his hands under her thighs and lifting her up, Kashoku hurriedly locking her arms around his neck as he carried her over to the couch, cursing as he almost tripped over Justice. Kashoku hit the couch harder than she would have normally liked, but the fact Wells followed her down, shifting between the spread of her legs, and swooped into another long kiss like he couldn't get enough more than silenced any complaints. Kashoku threw her head back and moaned as he pushed her bra up and sucked a nipple into his mouth, other hand palming her other breast until he lifted his head to lathe at that one, a hint of teeth grazing the nipple and drawing a hiss from her. Her nails raked across Wells's back lightly, and her hands groped down and underneath his pants to grip his ass firmly.

Wells jerked slightly in her grip and huffed out a low moan. He maneuvered himself upright with a last kiss and crawled up her slightly, one hand reaching over her towards the drawer in the stand. Cursing when he still couldn't reach, Wells moved to his knees and leaned over her more. As he finally got the drawer open, Kashoku licked her lips at the expanse of torso and covered groin before her. Rising to her elbows she licked and kissed his stomach, the muscles tensing at her ministrations as Wells let out a frustrated growl and his search became more frantic. Kashoku laughed and laid back down to eagerly pop the button of his jeans, carefully tugging the zipper and then pants down enough to free him except for his boxers, and palming him with precise touches. Wells's penis strained against the fabric, precum leaking out to wet the material. Kashoku had just leaned forward to suck at the wetness when Wells let out a victorious cry and sat back. She tried not to pout too much, choosing instead to sit up and meet him in another open-mouthed kiss, hands slipping behind her back to undo her bra until she gave it up for too tangled, dragging it over her head uncomfortably instead.

Wells made good use of the time she was struggling to shove his pants and boxers down. He was quick and methodical with the aluminum wrapper and took only a moment to appreciate the sight of her beneath him, pupils blow, nipples hard and red, lips spit-slick and swollen, tongue caught between her teeth as she laid back and looked her fill. They were both too needy to linger long though. Kashoku made a soft noise in the back of her throat and touched his bare thigh, and Wells had his lips back on hers before she could even catch her breath. His hands fumbled with her zipper, and she tried to scramble up the couch to shove them down just as he yanked hard on her jeans and underwear, her slender body sliding down the couch with them and a yelp. With a snort, Kashoku wiggled higher and grabbed the couch before Wells pulled again. This time the clothes went without their owner.

Both of their jeans were just pushed down off their waists, but Wells was pressing in and Kashoku's back arched with a loud gasp as she felt herself grow completely full. It was uncomfortable, but it was exactly what she wanted in that moment. Wells didn't give her much time to adjust, keeping with the fast pace they had started with. Kashoku clawed at his back, certain she was drawing blood, but Wells was playing right along as he bit at her lower lip.

This wasn't loving sex, couldn't be anything but a primal rough fuck, she knew. She and Wells were having a silent battle of dominance, broken only by their harsh grunts and moans, and Kashoku decided she wanted to be the winner of their friendly skirmish. With a forceful shove she pushed Wells up and out of her, his surprise giving her time to scramble the rest of the way out of her clothing and shove him back against the back of the couch.

He looked up at her with lust blown eyes, showing no indication that he was rejecting her need for control. Sinking down into his lap she grabbed onto his hair forcefully and latched back onto his mouth. His nails dug into the small of her back, then down to palm roughly at her ass, and she moaned encouragingly into his lips. His hips began moving to meet her and before long she had to pull away from his lips to let out a sharp gasp as her body trembled with orgasm. She felt paralyzed with pleasure as she continued to quiver.

Wells took the opportunity to take back control and had her slammed back into the cushions, his breaths and movements becoming more and more erratic before he was crying out against her lips and he came to a halt above her. Their breaths came out in pants, Kashoku rubbing soft circles into Wells's forearm and their eyes locked onto one another. When his breathing finally evened back out he reached up and brushed back a strand of hair that was stuck to her sweaty forehead before leaning down and kissing her long and hard.

Breaking their kiss, he stood and pulled off the condom, tying it off and padding to the kitchen to throw it away. When he came back, he reached down and laced his fingers with hers, tugging her up with him. He shrugged his jeans all the way off onto the floor and led her silently to the bathroom before letting go of her hand to turn the knobs to the shower. Kashoku stepped in and let the hot water flow over her skin. There was a sharp hiss as it hit areas where Wells had broken skin, but when he stepped under the spray with her she could see she had done the same to him. She was still wearing her ring, so with a gentle touch to one of the welts on his arm, she let her magic flow until the bruises and cuts disappeared without a trace.

Wells tugged her into his arms and gently ran his hands across her body, rubbing away the sweat and, perhaps, taking the chance to explore her more patiently. They stood there in each other's arms without a word spoken until the water grew cold. Wells dressed himself in a ratty t-shirt and a pair of boxers before handing Kashoku one of his own shirts and dragging her to the bed. They settled next to each other, Kashoku placing her head against his chest and his arm wrapping protectively around her waist.

"I don't regret it," Kashoku spoke softly, breaking the silence. Even though there wasn't an air of awkwardness between them, she felt it needed to be said.

"Well, if I did I wouldn't have let you stay around," Wells said with his returned cockiness. "Have to admit, though, it feels a lot like a rebound." He gave a snort. "I would know."

Kashoku felt a stab of guilt run through her, and she lifted herself off of his chest. "I'm so sorry I-"

Wells gently reached for her arm and pulled her back down. "I never said that I wasn't okay with it. In my experience rebound sex is the best sex, and you hardly disappointed."

Kashoku smiled against his shirt, but she wasn't completely convinced. "It's not like that…not completely. Daniel and I had been done for a while. I just… I need to be near someone. I need the closeness, but Brandon," she moved her head so that her chin was resting against his and her eyes met his. "You'll get in trouble. You said there were rules about teammates and relationships. I don't think I could stand it if something happened to you."

"Trouble is understating it," he sighed. "We go to jail for that sort of thing. At least, we're supposed to. But hey!" He spoke with a more light-hearted tone, "None of us have ever exactly been ones to follow the rules before, so why start conforming now? Besides…" He sighed, looking more serious as he stared up at the ceiling. "You aren't the only one who could use the closeness. I've tried just having a friend-with-benefits relationship with some girls, but no matter how great the sex was I could never just talk with any of them about work. I never wanted a serious commitment with them, but some days it's just nice to talk with someone about how I got captured by some Jaffa and thought that today might have been my last. I'm not saying let's be in a relationship – it would never work – but for now… Maybe we can just be with each other?"

Kashoku curled into his side and grinned. "That's an eloquent way of calling us friends-with-benefits."

He rolled his eyes as he turned on his side to meet her. "Would you rather I just call us fuck buddies?"

She smiled wider. "It's calling it what it is, I suppose." She let out a small laugh. "Kage would have a field day right now…"

"She can't know," he said softly. "No one can."

"I know," Kashoku responded with a sigh.

"I mean it. No one. Not Carr, not Michelle, not Kage."

"I know… Do you think it's worth it?"

Wells reached up and caressed her cheek with his thumb. "Yes. Do you?"

She didn't answer right away, thinking back to how her and Daniel's first attempt at a relationship ended up with him being grounded. If they were caught, the consequences would be far worse.

"Yes."

It was close to two hours before Ramirez returned, bitching about traffic, but takeout food in one hand and alcohol in the other. "I thought we weren't drinking?" Kage asked, raising an eyebrow as she sat up on her elbows. She inhaled. "Shit, what is that?"

"You said you were tired of going out and drinking," Ramirez commented as she set everything down on the table, "This is staying in. And I ordered Chinese, but then I caught a whiff of wings next door when I was buying the beer, so I said fuck it, I'm a goddamn Marine and you're some kind of alien witch, we can totally eat both."

"Fair enough," Kage responded to all of it, cravings for a drink rising up as she eyed the dark brown beer bottles in the various six packs. She climbed off the bed and reached for one instantly while Ramirez laid out the absolutely insane amount of food on the foot of her bed, popping off the top and flinging it into the trash can. "So, what are we watching?"

"I don't think I can survive another mission where you don't understand Bentley's Fight Club references, so we are watching that," she said simply as she pulled the DVD from one of the bags. "It's a cult classic that even Kashoku should watch."

"Good luck with that," Kage huffed before stuffing a large egg roll into her mouth.

They made it through Fight Club, Kage thoroughly enjoying it as Ramirez had expected, and had gotten about half way through Top Gun. The wings had been absolutely decimated, the Chinese looking barely touched despite how much of it they'd eaten, and the beer was almost out. They were as full and satisfied as they could be when Kage started laughing, leaning more of her weight on Ramirez's shoulder.

"Oh my god, he does act like that," she commented, her cheeks a soft red from the buzz. "I'm honestly surprised he hasn't tried singing to Kashy yet."

"Don't count it out just yet," Ramirez laughed. She had told Kage when they started the movie that Top Gun was kind of corny and really inaccurate, but that all pilots actually were pompous, cocky bastards. Wells and the main character had a lot in common with their personalities, she'd said with a smirk.

Kage definitely couldn't disagree. "Is that what he flew before he joined the SGC?"

"Similar," Ramirez nodded. "Those are naval jets, and he's Air Force, so different model numbers, but pretty much the same. Wells would probably tell you differently, but trust me, don't let him. He'll go on and on and will cry when you tell him you don't give a shit."

"Ugh," Kage groaned with a smile as she let herself fall back on her pillows happily. "Thanks for doing this."

Ramirez fell back next to her, beer still in hand. "Eh, not like I have anything better to do. Antonio can take care of himself. You know, did I tell you what he did? I tried to go by my apartment to grab some real booze, but the fucker doorsocked the damn door. Not his bedroom, Kage, the fucking apartment door. Little shit." Ramirez started giggling next to her, struggling to hold the beer level so none spilled.

Kage snorted at how amazed her companion sounded, but honestly she wasn't really following her. It never really seemed to matter with Ramirez though. She tried to remember what she'd been saying before and went back to that. "Yeah, but I mean, you've put up with me a lot more than you have to," she said, struggling to keep her words coherent.

"You're not so bad," Ramirez countered, turning her head to smile briefly at her. "I expected a lot worse after all the stories that were going around after your first visit."

Kage let out a harsh snort. "I can only imagine the things said."

"Eh, no different than what they all say about us. We're kind of the outcast team. A bunch of fuckin' jarheads who have a knack for violence," Ramirez sighed, taking another swig of her beer. "Marines have never exactly been anyone's favorite."

"Fuck 'em. They're my favorite," Kage said, turning her head so that she was staring right at Ramirez.

Ramirez returned her stare, one eyebrow raised questioningly. "Whatever, chica, I'm calling bullshit."

"No, I'm serious," Kage insisted, shifting so that she was sitting further upright. "Do you think anyone else would have given me an outlet to let out all my anger and frustration the way you and Rafe do? Or that any other team leader would have asked Hammond to put me on a team?"

"Not in a million years," Ramirez agreed as she set her beer down on the night stand and adjusted so that she was level with Kage. Her hair was all mussed up and her face was a little ruddy from the booze, and there was a stain of sauce from the wings on her cheek, but she didn't look anything but beautiful as she met Kage's gaze.

"So, see? I'm serious. And…" Kage bit at her lower lip. She knew that if she hadn't been drinking, she'd never have the balls to say this, to do anything but look, but she also knew that she wanted to tell Ramirez, who she'd seen looking before too and who wanted to hang out with Kage tonight even if nobody else was there. "You're my favorite out of everyone," she whispered. Ramirez was staring at her blankly, seemingly not really knowing what to say, so Kage swallowed hard, gathered her nerves, and leaned in. The smell of the wing sauce was overpowering this close up, the angle was awkward as hell, and Ramirez's lips tasted like beer, but her mouth was soft and responsive as Kage kissed her. She slipped her hand up, fingers just brushing Ramirez's silky hair and the skin of her neck, and it felt like her stomach was in knots she was so happy – and then Ramirez inhaled sharply and shoved Kage back and over the side of the bed.

"What the fuck?!" Ramirez scrambled off the bed on the other side, her eyes wide. Kage could only stare in stunned silence as she climbed to her knees. Shouldn't she be saying that? "What the fuck gave you the idea that you could just do that?!" Ramirez demanded.

"I'm sorry, I thought-" Kage started, confusion in her voice. She was too off-kilter to really snap back, too thrown by this sudden turn of events at the moment, but Ramirez had no such problem, cutting her off.

"Whatever the hell you thought, fucking forget it!" Her body was trembling despite the fierce words, and it wasn't anger in her brown eyes as she tried to glare at Kage, bending over and dragging her socks and shoes on with jerky, hurried motions. Clearly the woman was intent on not staying a moment longer.

Kage clenched her lower jaw shut. She was well aware of the risk she had been taking when she made a move, but this reaction was blowing it well out of proportion. She climbed to her feet and tried to soothe over the situation as best she could in her buzzed state. "Shit, Ramirez, all you had to do is say no. I just thought I had seen you eyeing up women at the bars and-"

"You fucking didn't! Do you understand me?" Ramirez was across the small room in seconds, hands gripping tightly around the collar of her shirt. "You never saw that!"

Kage's heart was beating fast, pounding in her ears. She had never seen her friend look like this, and it had her terrified. "No, I don't-"

"Kage! I have never looked at another woman like that and neither have you! Do. You. Understand?" Her fingers were gripped so tightly they were turning pale and Kage could feel the fine tremors running through them even if she somehow hadn't seen what was before her eyes.

She gently placed her hands on Ramirez's and squeezed, trying to offer some small comfort against whatever this was as she gave an unsure nod. "Yeah… Yeah, I got it," she said softly.

Ramirez removed her hands swiftly, as if Kage's touch caused burns on her skin. Her breaths were quick and she stood there simply staring for several moments, her mouth opening and closing a few times before she spun around, grabbed her keys from the top of the dresser, and fled with a slam of the door.

Kage sat heavily on the bed, confusion, rejection, and worry replacing the warm fuzzy buzz she'd been enjoying just five minutes before, and in the background Top Gun droned on.

"What the hell just happened?"

The next morning didn't bring any more clarity. All morning long Ramirez not only ignored any attempts at a conversation, but she was blatantly being a bitch. That was saying something coming from her, but the other woman was snapping at her for everything from asking questions to ribbing Bentley about the date he'd had the night before, even though Ramirez herself normally gave the man way worse for his thinly veiled booty calls. Even Bentley had taken Kage's side, but Ramirez ripped into him so bad he just held up his hands and went back to his own work until he could flee to SG-15's office without Connors having his ass. Rafe actually pulled rank on Ramirez at one point, telling her she was damn lucky Connors wasn't around, but the warning only reined the Latina in marginally. She was all over the place and Kage wanted to help her, but the more time spent in the small room with her and Rafe's narrowed, suspicious gaze, the angrier Kage got. It was barely approaching lunchtime when she had to storm out, the only alternative before she started throwing fists.

In the hallway, she hesitated. She could go to SG-15's lab like Bentley did, but no doubt he had told everyone he passed about Ramirez's warpath, and she feared she might actually snap if she had to hear a single word about it from Carr or Wells, asking her what she'd done. She knew what had set Ramirez off – she just didn't know why. And with the woman in question making it clear there would be blood if Kage tried to approach her to clear things up, Kage wasn't likely to have an answer anytime soon. That left only the gym where at least the equipment could be replaced if she lost it.

Unfortunately, some people on her team couldn't leave well enough alone. Luckily for the SGC, it wasn't Ramirez.

"What the hell is up with you two?" Rafe called out, having finally tracked her down. She'd had a good few minutes with the punching bag before he arrived, so he must have gone to SG-15's office first. Or he'd taken the opportunity of privacy to give Ramirez the same third-degree he was about to give her. Kage landed a kick so hard that the punching bag flew off its hook.

"I don't know. Why don't you fucking ask her?" Kage hissed as she reached down for the chain to lift the bag back up.

"I did. I can only assume she told me to go do something very inappropriate to myself in Spanish," he responded as he moved to a mat and motioned for her to join him.

"Well, maybe you should follow her advice." She took a fighting stance and they began to maneuver around each other. Normally she tried to wait Rafe out, but today she was angry. She faked to the right and then came at Rafe hard.

"It might be interesting to try," Rafe responded, dodging a fist and ducking around to the side of her, "but I think I'd like to figure out why both of you are being royal assholes first." He blocked Kage's next kick and stepped back warily when she backed up a few steps and gave him a measuring look. "You two were bosom buddies when I saw you yesterday. The hell happened?"

Kage thought about not telling him, but she figured that if anyone knew Ramirez it would be Rafe. She sighed as she got back into a fighting stance, and across from her, Rafe mirrored her actions. "We stayed in last night and watched some moves, had a few beers," she breathed as she threw a few punches and followed with a kick that just missed from side swiping his feet from under him.

"Okay, and? Sounds normal."

"And I kissed her."

Rather than deflecting her next punch, Rafe grabbed Kage's wrist and jerked her in close, grabbing onto her and literally dropping like a rock to the mat. They both landed like shit, the wind rushing from Kage as she landed, and half under her, Rafe let out a grunt and rolled her underneath him.

"What the fuck?!" Kage snapped. "Foul!"

"Shut up," Rafe said his face serious as he looked down on her.

Kage was stunned enough that she frowned, closing her mouth on the rest of that rant. "Okay…" she said slowly. "But unless you start talking real fast, I'm going to throw your ass across the room like I did that bag."

Rafe sighed. "Kage, I don't know what it's like on Spira, but you can't fucking say shit like you just did here. About kissing women," he added, quietly but intently, leaning in close and staring her down. "Don't ever say that."

Kage shoved Rafe off of her, suddenly furious again. "I don't fucking understand what you two's deal is! I made an assumption that turned out to be wrong and you two go fucking postal! All she had to say was that she wasn't interested! If it's because we're on the same team then, again, that was all she had to fucking say."

Rafe shoved a hand over her mouth and pressed her back down. "Shut the hell up! You can't just be shouting that shit wherever you want!"

Kage shoved his hand away and leaned up into his face. "I don't understand! Why?!"

Rafe looked around hesitantly, making sure that no one else was around that might hear. Most of the personnel who were anywhere nearby had headphones in thankfully, and while their time on the ground was gaining a few looks, most people were used to his and Kage's spars occasionally ending in wrestling and fucking around, so no one seemed suspicious. If his girl kept making a fuss though, that might change. "Because you can't be gay in the military," he said finally.

"I don't know what that means!" she responded furiously.

"It means," he growled, "that women can't love women and men can't love men!"

Kage's mouth dropped, actually taken back enough to be speechless for a few blessed seconds as he cautiously let her sit up and moved back to kneel in front of her. Then, "That is the stupidest thing I have ever heard!" She punched him in the arm, glaring.

"Hey, look, I'm not saying it's right," he said, throwing his hands up defensively, his sharp motion contrasting against the hush of his voice. "I personally don't give two shits who you want to fuck, but the military says it's taboo, and frankly so does a lot of our world still. Maybe someday it'll be different, but right now this is how it is. If anyone around here heard you saying that shit, she could lose her job and worse. You understand, now?"

No. She didn't. There weren't forbidden relationships on Spira. There were no words that labeled different types of relationships and no one cared. So, no, she didn't understand why it was taboo. But… Shit. She could understand why Ramirez had flipped out if her entire job was at risk. Why Ramirez would continue to flip out if Kage ever tried again, even if she did apologize and fix things between them. Her shoulders slumped in defeat and she stared down at the mat. "Was I at least right?"

"About what?" Rafe asked as he stood and offered her a hand up.

"You know… my assumption," she whispered the word as she grabbed her towel.

Rafe raised an eyebrow at her. "Tch. I don't know shit, ya feel me?"

Kage sighed out of frustration, but there was nothing else she could do. "Yeah… I feel you." Not even the brief side hug Rafe gave her before he ducked off to the showers made her feel any less defeated.

Kage had set out that morning thinking there'd just been some misunderstanding that she could fix. She'd let herself think like Kashoku, focusing on how sure she'd been that Ramirez had responded to her in the same way, and had totally fucking ignored the possibility that the problem wasn't something Kage could beat, that Ramirez wasn't suddenly shoving her as far away as she could just because the woman was overreacting. She wasn't being a giant bitch because she didn't appreciate Kage's advance – she was fucking terrified of it.

"FUCK!" Kage screamed under the muffling beat of the shower head, the tile walls echoing her mockingly. She punched the tile just once, and leaned back against the side partition as she tried to will back her frustration. Suck it up and move on, she told herself firmly, rubbing her face and tugging hard on her hair. She hit the wall again, open palmed, and took only another minute before she took a breath, shut the water off, and made herself get out. She dressed, dried her hair, and headed for the chow hall.

She'd expected no one she knew to be there, the large clock on the wall attesting that she'd missed the rush, so spotting Kashoku at a table, sitting alone for once, was a surprise. Her friend didn't look like she was really bothered by the empty spaces all around her, but Kage quickly grabbed her food and headed over anyway. "Hey," she offered as she set her tray down across from her.

"Hey!" Kashoku responded cheerfully. Her face lit up as she smiled at Kage, and for her part, Kage felt able to relax for the first time all morning as she smiled back.

It felt like it had been ages since she'd seen her best friend, both of them busy with their job and Kage always off with her team, or Rodd, or- Kage blinked, only just realizing how the tables had turned recently to where she was the one often too busy to hunt down the other. It was weird, and she vowed to do better by her best friend. Especially since it seemed her social time was about to be cut down with her Ramirez fuck-up.

"Where's the rest of the gang?" she asked as she stabbed her chicken with her fork and began to cut. She wasn't actually sure if Wells and Rodd had gotten over their Kashoku-guilt yet, but Rodd at least seemed like he was finally confident enough yesterday morning, so maybe he and Carr would be joining them.

Kashoku rolled her eyes, putting that idea to rest. "They went on a 'men's only' lunch with your guys."

Kage scoffed at the comment. "So then where's Bentley?"

Kashoku laughed. "I'll tell him you said that."

"Be my guest," she offered proudly. They fell into a comfortable silence as they ate before Kage couldn't help but mention what was on her mind. "This planet's ideals fucking suck."

Kashoku looked up from her salad in confusion. "What ideals?"

"Love." The shocked look from her friend was expected. Hell, this was a topic she hated touching with a ten-foot-poll and she certainly wasn't going to dive any further into it, but Kashoku never asked. Instead she only looked down at her food sadly.

"Yeah… I know."


End file.
